You think seeing is believing
You think you're alive just because you're breathing
But the truth that you've been told
Is stale and old
It holds you back, won't let you move
To do some good or think of something new
Dark and relentless, warped and demented
Read on if this has captured your attention

So this is what it's like to be holy?
This was the vision that kept me awake in bed
The revelation manifesting itself in my head
I remember wishing so hard to wake up dead
But then a whispering voice crept up and said
"Why not turn your weakness into strength instead?"
It was like a gust of wind with a goal to embed
Me with some kind wisdom for what was ahead
But who was I? Some kid thought to be brain dead
Filled with guilt, shame and irrational dread
Always quiet, leaving my words left unsaid

So this is what it's like to be holy?
But now after hard work and humbling failures
I'm breaking down doors and busting up barriers
This is so major
After dealing with haters, traitors and jailers
Who gave me the spark, who gave me a reason
To go make my mark and fight for my freedom
To pick up the pieces and make something decent
To freeze all the heathens and either eat or be eaten
Or I could have become numb and go to the bottle
But I'm having too much fun becoming colossal
       -Tommy Johnson
Sunlight warming up face
They're bitter just taking up space
But I'm trying to start something
I'm not trying to be judging
But it's kind of touching
How I started out as nothing

So this is what it's like to be holy?

Above my head, I saw the dead dance
Put under a trance
A Gothic romance
I heard the whisper say "take a chance"
"It's the won't it's never can't"
"You must always advance"
And with that I made took my stance

So this is what it's like to be holy?

During that winter
We experienced a blizzard of crippling misfortune
Cold misery mounted our souls
And we carried it wherever we went
Filled with shame and strokes of bad luck
We were put into a hypothermic coma
And pushed along by careless snowplows
Forced into the drive way aprons of the rock salt streets

You’re something I can’t believe  
Hey there angel, no please go on
I’m so blind I should’ve known
You’d take away all my loneliness
And this is something I can’t help but to confess

My brain melts whenever you’re around
So much to say but I can’t make a sound
You’re my addiction, my only vice
I can’t believe what I see

I can’t believe you’re real
Brighter than the sun
Make my heart skip a beat
I’ve waited for so long

It runs through my head repeatedly
The idea of you just wanting me
And have someone I can call mine
I can’t keep this feeling inside

I never had this feeling before
A girl of such great candor
Your utter being mystifies
You know I just can’t believe
I can’t believe you’re real
Brighter than the sun
Make my heart skip a beat
I’ve waited for so long

Shake my world
Please be my girl

I never had this feeling before
A girl of such great candor
Your utter being mystifies
You know I just can’t believe

I can’t believe you’re real
Brighter than the sun
Make my heart skip a beat
I’ve waited for so long

I’ve known you for quite some time
Who could have known?
I had no idea you be mine
I always hoped

I can’t believe you’re real
Brighter than the sun
Make my heart skip a beat
I’ve waited for so long

Shove it in the box
So I can catch a glimpse
Of the soldiers walking home
Going single file
All the way home

Scribble it out
It’s not good enough yet
Hold tight

From the earth and the sea
Pour it on me
So versatile
Your smile

The smallest shell
The toughest to crack
It draws near
The last one born
Coming home
Coming home
What a good story, now close the lid

The living legend is ****** into a rut of pining for his splendid playwright
She was his everything
A new breed of woman
No societal entourage could compare
No jovial jubilee could top her
Her humongous measure of perplexity
Her grace
Her charm
Her mystery

He now despises himself for this moment of nostalgic weeping
The mucus makes it hard for him to breathe with his deviated septum
He looks for something to alleviate his sniffling
And eviscerate all his emotional anguish
Nasal spray and bourbon
He can breathe but the alcohol only exacerbates the visceral issue
And dampens his already flaccid spirit  

Clouted with the disheartening reminder that it wasn't all her fault
He fumbles with the bottle while retracing the event in his mind

"It was the golden age of bronze metals"
"She was asked to do as she was told"
"A white lie"
"A foul up"
"An accusation"
"An accessory to ******"
"Madcap ad libbed alibis and recounts verbatim"
"She turned on them, they killed her"

The bourbon was gone, his nose was stuffed again
Wheezing, gagging, crying  

What's the word for when a living legend wants to die?

Hush now
In this pain
There’s a broken bone
Felt on me
Where we’ve been
Fascinations
In the faithless age
Guess again
At your fingertips
As the lake
Flows on away my friend
Men grow old
Every child knows the end
Drive fast
While we stand here
Someone help
Get me out of here
Our spirits name it
And it’s so huge and wide
I’ll make it great
Go back
Dot the I’s
Darling
In the sea air
Liar
Kiss her
Shine against her
It’s hard to tell
Get off
Tired games
Goodbye

A robust, full bodied cup of coffee
The resounding zeros and dated euphemisms
The criminal and large and I sitting
He has something to say I tell him to spit it out
He says he knows I'm holding out on him and tells me to cough it up

I adhere to his demand and pull out my rucksack and empty it out on the shellacked table

Cream of tartar
Cumin
Cloves
Bay leaves    
Clovers
Ginger
Mustard seeds
Anise
A plethora of extracts and Madagascar vanilla bean

I give in because this guy has a murderous track record nine miles long
While I have a lifelong loosing streak
I dare not try and petition him with defiant excuses and off the hook tones

He needed these things to prepare a meal for his dying father
He suffers from hangnails and trend followers
As his son follows a dark path that is a far cry from a path that will lead to a career

The criminal gathers the vials of herbs and spices with tears in his eyes and goes on his way
I sit and finish my coffee unfazed and understanding

To be continued...

The Kleptomaniac sat in his stolen smoking jacket
Disregarding all the trifling troubles of the world
And plotting his next lofty move

The Urchin rolled down his window
And screamed his head off about Manifest Destiny
In the Sahara

The two met at the airport
A rift in fate
They were both subjected to a pat down search
The Urchin attempted to interject
The Kleptomaniac saw him as an irritant who should just keep his mouth shut, yet respected his bold brashness

The Urchin saw the Kleptomaniac as a person on the right track
Someone of substance

He wanted to simulate
Emulate
Imitate
Everything he was

They were both the biggest all star losers at their all time low winning at having the two longest losing streaks ever  
Inglorious

They traded numbers
But never spoke again
Even though they knew the phone worked both ways

Everyday you live is another social experiment
Live it with a grateful attitude
Gratitude
Play it by ear
Off the top of your head
Read the unwritten laws
And hear to the unspoken rules
Fair warning, they'll ask you to take sides
They'll take advantage of any soft spot they can find
People's lethal libidos
Off base orchestrations
Driving you up the wall
Repeating louder to instill their point
Tight knit cliques of fashion victims
Clever spoonerisms
Brutal braggarts
Do not let them get the best of you
With their slurred words
And blurred vision
I tell you this in confidence
You will have the last laugh and the last word
I know the past makes you tense
But if it's not your policy it's not your problem
Legend has it, time keeps you waiting
For your metamorphosis
To become your peacemaker
       -Tommy Johnson

The over-zealous zealot passed the buck to the drunk monk
Who just got back from his vacation in ****, France
Crunching numbers out of context
Inflicting catch 22's

Vocable
Colloquial  
Do-able
Crass
Exerting energy on inert beings
A hankering for mediocre comestibles
Velvet intuition
Ignore the meteorological forecast

Cut to the chase
Regale me
Regain my attention
Tell me the difference between value, price, cost and worth
Distill my soul
Make me more refined
And filter me
So I may reign supreme
Good luck
       -Tommy Johnson

The retired vaudevillian engraves his love's epitaph while eating caramelized clusters
The local sodomites huddle around and mourn outside the morgue
Waiting for the body of their **** to be handed over
They've given her body an overhaul
She looks more alive than when she was living
Hobnobbing with the well-to-do

The retired vaudevillian comes to collect the body of his deceased wife
He looks down at the sodomites
For their outlandish appearance and choice of employment has resulted in mistrust

"Oh my love, why couldn't you have been the driver instead of the passenger whose body was jettisoned into the air and smashed upon the asphalt?"
"She could do ten thousand breast strokes, paint masterpieces with one brush stroke"

The sodomites began to taunt the vaudevillian
Calling him washed up
He retorted back calling them toothless heathen ******  
A mercenary was called to end the dispute outside of the morgue
He killed half of the sodomites and tasered the vaudevillian

The undertaker wheeled out the body bag on dolly
But he lost control, and the body went careening down the hill into a cloudy bay
The party of mourners grouped around the bay and watched the body float on to the afterlife
She left behind her has-been husband and her **** ******* cohorts
I bet she would have appreciated this little organized dime store wake

Hello doctor I'm in so much pain
I will pay any amount to make it go away
You see, my head is pounding and I can't see
My burned throat is what's really ailing me
Not even my shattered heart hurts this bad
These lacerations are making me go mad

I need to speak but it hurts so much
I need a vocal crutch
The wounds filled with **** and misery
Why oh why has karma done this to me?
Shouldn't have been a loud mouth
So my throat is closed now

There must be some sort of pill to heal me
Perhaps a shot, a needle, yes a vaccine
It strangles me from the inside out
I can't even scream for help
No I can't make a sound
I'm asking for a remedy
Oh please I'm begging on my knees

Worst pain I've ever felt
Inability to talk
Choke in my sleep
Nightmare where I'm in a sonic lock

Inflamed
Engulfed
Infected
And swollen
I fear
Ill never
Ever
Speak again

Worst pain I've ever felt
Inability to talk
Choke in my sleep
Nightmare where I'm in a sonic lock

I need to speak but it hurts so much
I need a vocal crutch
The wounds filled with **** and misery
Why oh why has karma done this to me?
Shouldn't have been a loud mouth
So my throat is closed now

Lost my voice
To the pain
Lost my choice
It was slain
And now I wither in silence
Doctor, doctor gimme your compliance

******* there’s twenty dollars down the *******
Five cartomizers for this electric cigarette
Why am I even smoking?
I quit five years ago, so why even put this in my body?
Where is the logic in that?
Because I like what it does to me
I like the relaxing hush it puts over me
But ******* it!
These five little cartomizers full of nicotine ain’t compatible with the battery because they’re for the rechargeable e-cigs
The ***** at 7-11 didn’t tell me that, why would she?
It’s her gain and my loss.
That’s her logic “this clueless kid doesn’t know any better, he just wants his nicotine fix.”
****, just ****
So now I either go buy the rechargeable kit for another twenty dollars
Or I just buy another disposable one for ten dollars and make the twenty I already spent completely worthless
Well
I’m not spending the other twenty, forget that right now!
I’m gonna buy another disposable one, then smoke the five nicotine cartridges, then the one it will come with then the first one I bought if it still has some juice left in it
All before the battery runs out and I gotta buy another one
Goodbye lungs!
Logic

We are all here

The values and morals we’ve all held dear are now gone

Now look!

Can you think of your next move?

Has the migration begun without you?

Unperplexed or confused?
Fire and ice
Rejection and acceptance
***** and *****

Has no grasp of the underlying meaning
As a meager happy tune come from the mouth
And a barrage of bullets disperse from the automatic
A song of love sung in a whisper as the lives of complete strangers are ended

Undertakers in the delivery room
Can never have enough
Already have too much
A cradle and a coffin to set the mood

I got one!
Bring meaning to the meaningless
Excess is the American way
And to that I salute
The senselessness
Keeps the infinite far
Too far for us to obtain

Make me
Tase me
Take me away
Cuff me
Love me
Shut me out

Your gun and badge do not make you more than us

Symbol of conformity
And self denial
To go through the gates
To the other side

And for that I send you my condolences

Lock me in a prison
I’ll get out in time
I’ll be free where it counts
In my heart and my mind
While you’re locked outside

Telling me
Giving me orders
On how to act
On how to be

Am I out of control?
Yes
Okay, just checking
Alright, good

Once you’re out of the control
Of others
You learn to control yourself

Right and wrong
Yin and yang
Passion and rationale
Decline and growth

Stuff your sorry's in a sack
Everything in moderation

You have arms like noodles
Technology and my bladder hate me


It's better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven

I do as I Please
And that tickles my funny-bone

There is a fine line
Between being a party planner and being a clone

I don't go there as much as I used to

It's hard to get on your good side
When I'm just a walking disaster

Friendship shouldn't be broken by misunderstandings
There is no bliss in ignorance

This is going to get worse before it gets better

Go on with this emotional release
Tell me more about me

Get your lufa
I don't want any part of this

Life is a dream for the dead

Good talk. good luck, goodbye and godspeed

Buried hatchets and gateway drugs
Third wheels in search of two way streets
Manic compulsions are my hobbies, I need closure
The bad news bearer has me pegged, I'm still unsure
The bad guy still harbors feelings, drowns in his thoughts

Use you foresight to see that you need
To do the breast stroke to win
But in hindsight I guess you shouldn't have made that last brushstroke beforehand
Clog my toilet with a dollop, you hoot and holler, you'll get a wallop
Rebuked and cold cocked, so despondent kick rocks at their glass house

Goose eggs make green house gas
Do or die, cardiac arrest
Life's calling
The call is dropped
You're unfit for this
I'd like a life line
It's survival of the fittest

       -Tommy Johnson

I found the rat-fink bound at the whipping post
I found the ****** at the hitching post
I'm the one itching to go
Find me at the scratching post
Chomping at the bit
Chipping off the splintered wood on a telephone post  

Get me out of this stockade
Put me in the guillotine
Because I'm out of my head
And I'm going off
Bombard you with simple truths
You know it isn't all it's cracked up to be
If it's too good to be true
You've forced my hand
Now I gotta be uncouth
Something I gotta come to terms with
Something I gotta come to grips with

Looking back at my formative years
With the world I lived in hot on my heels
The celibate dust collectors
The abstinent hypoglycemic meat puppets
I was on cue
My cue to calibrate my own gumption
Bounced off the wall
Put on parole
Used my reserved rights to exercise my rights
To put my foot in the door and leave it a jar
While I stuck my hands in the cookie jar
But I guess there is such a thing as too much of a good thing
Become an over night success
Being famous for being famous
That whole scenario's played out
So mind your P's and Q's
I'll ask you point blank
Do you think you're ingenious?
Prodigious?
Are you in that proverbial extravaganza?
Collecting blood diamonds
Enunciation silent letters
That say all that need be said
Sent through the Pony Express
Written in an acrostic anagram
She'll answer with palindrome acronym in a Pig Latin
And she's right
In some aspect
To a certain point
To some degree
She sheds light
In some right

Forever in debt to the price to survive
Forever seems like such a long time
Forever damaging stubborn pride
Forever giving out bad advice

Onomatopoeias
They are setting up camp
On the tip of my tongue
Sarcastic tooth fillings
Profanity coats my gums
My lips chapped from social phobias

I fill the empty spaces of the conversation with senseless banter

I avoid the waiting faces
Making no eye contacts
Trying to come up with a response

What would you say we are?
Acquaintances?
Strangers?
Aliens?
Or friends?

Trying to give off a certain vibe

On the listens, smiles and invites

I don’t know you
You don’t know me
But that doesn't mean I’m not interested
Small talk is an obvious front

Hello
What’s your name?
Where you from?
What do you like?
What do you hate?

I see
Tell me your story
I’m curious
So amaze me
You’re so pretty

Come on
Tell me your sign
You know
We got nothing but time
Don’t send me away
My interest is peaked
Make my day

So please
What’s your talent?
What can you do?
There’s got to be something
Maybe name a few?

Well now
I have no idea
Where this will go
I’m an inquiring mind
Wanting to know

Visually you’re pleasing
And my brain is twitching
From your teasing
Tell me what’s on your mind
Baby we got nothing but time

Belief and faith
Guided by a deity
But the virtues and morals placed on me
I do not believe so

No religion or cult has proof or disproof
They believe what they believe

Symbols have different meanings in different eyes

Parallel philosophies in different lives

From witchcraft
To a black mass

A hanging cross
Paradise lost

Psychics and telepaths
Seems hokey

But it’s possible it sounds to me

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Well, the beholder might be blind

Or maybe we’re not in the universal mind
I believe in giving everything a chance
Taking what makes sense to me
And kindly placing down what I can’t dig

My lord, the lady of death approaches
She brings a note unfolding the plans
Of your untimely assassination
A shroud of blackness surrounds your chambers
No locks can prevent her from entering

Your eyes widen as you read
The message, so detailed, so terrifyingly distressing
Holding on to the last moments
So this event can never transpire

She turns
And walks

Heels tapping every step

Leaving you in a state of fear and angst
You don’t have much time

The seconds draw the minutes closer
Dragging your expiration along with is

A premonition
A prediction or maybe a hidden mission

Plotting the downfall of our king
A revolt a mutiny, a revolution
"Guard the doors!",  it won’t do any good

Panicking, twitching, sobbing, break down
And cry on the floor pleading to the gods
“No, no let it not be true!”

You look in the mirror and think

“This war, the famine, the toil in our kingdom and country it falls on me”

Before you even realize there’s a problem, death comes upon you

Never getting a chance to right your wrongs to redeem yourself

The note reads:
“The time has come. The time has come. A deal was made and our end is complete now you must hold your end.  One thousand breaths for a seat on the throne, when the sun goes down on this day your soul shall be taken.”

Oh why, why, why?
What a terrible bargain that was made
This poor man cannot be saved
For he has signed his named
And now he’ll die in shame

The lady shall return at dusk
Do not let her pass the gates

He writes letters of goodbye to the queen and their children
He says to me “you my most loyal and trusted subject, stay with me in my final hours. Pass on my story. A tale of deception and agony. Please don’t leave me.”

I nodded and agreed

The final hour of sun was coming to an end
The time has come

He sits staring out the window
His back turned to me, he prays

I brandish a long dagger
Place my hand on his shoulder rubbing in a friendly reassurance all will be well

He looks back at me, screams, jumps up and out of the window to his death
The transaction was complete

Now the lady of death comes for me
Contracts
Contracts

Get me a ticket flying cargo
Sweep me to Columbia, to Mexico
Desserts of ancient sands
Bring me enemies and friends
Take me in first class
And back again

Steal tears, take everything for me
Every need is a want, every want is a need
Riots at the embassy in Mexico
Carry on we’ve places to go
Take me by coach
You already know

My suspicion
Intercepts
Your deception
I don’t believe

Don’t call me paranoid
Because I see through your lies
No I'm not a skeptic
I'm just not dumb and blind

You'll never have my trust
I'll never confide in you
My faith was just sentenced to death
It's still hanging from the noose

My suspicion
Intercepts
Your deception
I don’t believe

Put your trust in no one
Then you'll never get hurt
Put it all in yourself
And see what its worth

I don’t believe in you
Someone I can't rely om
Your stories are fiction
So it makes me uncertain

Used to give people my trust
Then they'd throw it all away
Bought too many bridges
That’s why I hesitate

My suspicion
Intercepts
Your deception
I don’t believe

Put your trust in no one
Then you'll never get hurt
Put it all in yourself
And see what its worth

I don’t depend
I just doubt
The flames been
Blown out

My suspicion
Intercepts
Your deception
I don’t believe

Put your trust in no one
Then you'll never get hurt
Put it all in yourself
And see what its worth

The ingrate is chewing on his ungrateful cud
But he isn't a liberty to say what's in it
He spits fire at social drinkers
And goes slow mo in the fast lane
Just to ******* those he considers wastes of life
He'd curse them out but that be a wasted breath

The milk maid's dunlap is protruding
But she doesn't give 1/16th of a ****
Or 1/4th of a ****
She has gunk in her teeth
But all the *****, ***** old men are all aboard The Desperate Express

The polygamist is off to the races
Then the roller rink to inject misinformation into the grapevine
He gallantly gives his consent to take a lie detector test
As they try to get past his veneer and get a confession compromised of cul-de-sac secrets
With their monocle and chronic swamp-*** they contracted while waiting on line at the concession stand

The spy's identity will not be compromised
He needs to investigate this world's nation wide arms race to the red button that will undoubtedly end us all
That's why hes undercover in the vineyard
His beliefs correspond with mine
He thinks the planet will be fine but its inhabitants are doomed
And I concur

Back stage everyone was in a huff getting ready for the show
The critics were in the balconies
The understudies waited jealously in the wings
A fresh crop of new actors were about to take the plunge
To some this was just a pit stop to fame
To others this was their big break
And to the rest it was a moment where people would chew them out and pick at all their rookie moves
The actresses eye make up so rainbow-vibrant
Like oil spots
Popping Dramamine so they'll be able to stomach the ride
The men putting brill cream in their hair
Looking like quaffed oil slicks
Like they ran their fingers down an dip stick and applied generously
They all had great, even sun tans
Melanoma was of no concern in the tanning beds
And the burnt skin was just picked away
Sunspots

Here it comes curtain call
"Places everyone"
Time for this debacle
Everyone take a lap at the salt lick for luck

Take a bow
Not a dry eye in the house
They cast recedes back stage
Crying, hugging
They congratulate each other
But now live in paranoia of what the reviews will say
The applause outside is nonstop
They're all gonna need Melatonin to sleep and end the excited squeaks

They all get in their cars
Their SUV's
4 doors
2 doors
Hummers
All terrain vehicles
Taxis
Buses
Trains
And get rest for the next show tomorrow

As I'm left here driven to madness by guilt
Because I paid off the crowd to clap and the pundits to write rave reviews
That was the act for this evening, a tor de force production

In an attempt to reclaim my sanity
I sit and listen attentively to the whispers of the cold wind
It's rather stormy for the month of may
But beggars can't be choosers
I would have chosen a bright clear skied day
Instead of wet and windy sky of gray

Eyes hidden
Riddled with pain
Fiddling with your hands
Tell the truth

We have a treat for you all!
It's Captain Obvious and The No-duhs
With their newest hit single, "A picture of a picture"
How existential are they?!

They use a clavichord, a harpsichord
A mellotron along with an autoharp
And of course a theramin to express this song to the universe

I will say no more
Here they are, Captain Obvious and The No-duhs

"Hey, are you free today?"
"Hey are we still on for tonight?"
"Do you live in eternal
Or temporal time?"
"Lets look back on our
illegible live's highlights"

"I got a paper cut from a bookmark"
"But I haven't got a *******'s clue"
"If I should round to nearest tenth"
"Or pop all of the animals made from balloons"

"Now, I'm looking at a picture of a picture"
"And I'm truly the worst for wear "
"You missed the cut off date"
"You're camera shy so there"

"Hey, you wanna chill today?"
"Hey what you wanna do tonight?"
"Want to watch the changing of the tides?"
"Or take in a movie then go and grab a bite?"

"I disregard the label makers"
"And mark all the typos"
"Shorten all the long winded speeches"
"And smelt all the silver idols"

"Now, I'm looking at a picture of a picture"
"And I'm truly the worst for wear "
"You missed the cut off date"
"You're camera shy so there"

"Knit me a sweater of vanity and greed"
"Sew me a lust and sloth tapestry"
"Croshay me a hat of envy and wrath"
"Macramé me a bracelet of gluttony"

"Now, I'm looking at a picture of a picture"
"And I'm truly the worst for wear "
"You missed the cut off date"
"You're camera shy so there"

       -Tommy Johnson

The quartet became a trio
The trio became a duet
The duet became a solo act
The first chair was ambidextrous
His hands worked as a duo
He called them Cain and Abel
They had great reflexes
He washed them with soap and water

He played in light houses
Night clubs
Tin Pan Alley

He sang about tapped phones
With a dead pan, dry humor
And dehydrated wit
To a room full of sugar daddies and their sugar babies
His music left them befuddled but hungry for more

He ate nothing but black bean brownies for weeks
Any tiny morsel of food he could find to survive
He wore a pork pie hat
And would always say "lather rinse repeat"

To him racism was a detestable invention of mankind
"Towel-head"
He cringed at that word

But when he got on stage at The Tree Trunk a moment of tranquility commenced

Jack Squat, Tom, ****, Harry, Average Joe, John Doe and Mr. Smith
Decided to switch gears and do something neato
Instead of the usual nada and zilch

They went to go figure out exactly who's who in the zoo
And sure enough that's exactly what they did

They penetrated the mantel
Separated the crust
And stimulated the core

The Missionary positioned herself on her knees
And prepared to pray

They became metamorphic
They took the high ground
Ingenious
Sentiment

Fraternal twins
Both lived in eternal fret
One practiced fretwork
The other joined a fraternity
They both found each other years later at the amphitheater
They let their recessive genes surface
And clean the surface of their distressed jeans

Insane
In pain
Invain
My vanity
Is insanity
I'm panicking

The Golden age took place during My darkest days
Undisclosed illness
Indisposed
I left a bread crumb trail back to the poster board of my heroes and heroines

Masterfully
Mastery
Call me a maverick ,aster
Ask for me
Can't keep track of me
Can't keep up with me
Up keep
Big Mac attack
Crunch wrap supreme
It's not mystery
I'm a machine
Keep it clean
Make it shine and sheen

When it counted
I was unprepared and dumbfounded

But you'll never take them alive
They're already dead on the inside

I throw my voice
A slip of the lip
Plate tectonics take place  
Volcanoes erupt and coat the viceroy in ash

Cherish it

Eurydice's ****** body is covered in moss
I feel her aged finish and weep

We all scattered when it hit
I ran into an abandoned watermill
To hid from the infection they're trying to spread
The knowledge of good and evil

Apartment complexes mowed down
Only the doors remained standing
To be open and allow a sound to come out
The sound of defiant opposition
That will shake the world from this contagion

The Birthgiver's sacrifice, her life taken in vain
Now a mystic, an alchemist, a shaman and a mage come from the other side of the world

Here is the sound
The one the calls us
Here is the picture
Faded to yellow
Tattered away by time

There's a town somewhere up north off of route 54
It's cheap to live there, but I wouldn't recommend it
It's streets run with greed, ****** and sin
The people there are devoid any sense of ethics
It will leave you all shocked and breathless
Welcome to the neighborhood
Where you board up your windows and doors then double check if they're locked
Where you can always hear some one screaming
"Stop"
"Stop"

The mayor has been in office for six terms
And in his cabinet are members of the mob
Whose fronts are local mom and pops
Where junkies like to hang out
While a mugging of an eighty four year old widow takes place around the block
Welcome to the neighborhood
Where you board up your windows and doors then double check if they're locked
Where you can always hear some one screaming
"Stop"
"Stop"
       -Tommy Johnson

The youth are all in gangs that **** each other
Delinquent dropouts doing drive by's
Defiling untouched regions between innocent women's thighs
Girls making appointments for back alley coat hanger abortions
As some hate group constructs homemade bombs

Welcome to the neighborhood
Where you board up your windows and doors then double check if they're locked
Where you can always hear some one screaming
"Stop"
"Stop"

Diseases and food shortages
Rotten government cheese and unpaid mortgages
Call the department of health and human services
Life here is unbearable mercilessness  

Poverty and violence
Money and bullets keep those who might talk silent
Here it has come down to a simple science
The spineless **** the non-compliant for their defiance and they lay lifeless by the hands of those who commit viscous acts so mindless

Where you board up your windows and doors then double check if they're locked
Where you can always hear some one screaming
"Stop"
"Stop"

You may ask, "where is God or the police?"
They're doing their bi-weekly patrol
And they're both on big brother's private payroll
There is now law and order in this contaminated area
It's an unkempt, repugnant pustule in the middle of the caked-on face of America

Welcome to the neighborhood
Where you board up your windows and doors then double check if they're locked
Where you can always hear some one screaming
"Stop"
"Stop"

*** stain on the wall

A feeling of disgust stemming from the tip of my ****

The sound of someone taking a ****
Drip
Drip
Drip
They didn’t flush
Or put the toilet seat up

Next to a stranger I lay
Not exactly what I planned to do today
Today was brought to you by the word SHAME
And in this instance I wonder if I’m insane

***** laundry covers the floor
Double locked the bedroom door

Parents should be home soon
I must leave
Out the third story window
Goodbye, don’t call me

I've got more issues
Than the daily news
You don't even know the half of it
You're so full of it
You said "last time" last time
I'm guilty until proven innocent

Everything has a shelf life
I'm ******* up left and right
Please excuse my bad taste
As I build my persona and reinvent the wheel

These are the paths we follow
These are the lives we lead
We believe in our own lies so hollow
Mesmerized by their majesty

You have allotted powers
And a cognitive prerogative
To appropriate
The procreate
We co-create
Something concrete

Awestruck by the rhetoric
And the ironic ruckus
Of the fire truck up in flames
And the destructive rumpus of the ambulance taking lives in vain

It's nature verses nurture
You're blessed with life
Premeditate
And respect your life

The moment for reluctance has passed
The juncture of decision has come
To never know is to never ask
Let your knotted heart come undone

Flood my soul with your love
I'll become deluged and succumb
Attempt to quell this blazing sun

Allow your feelings to go unmasked
Watch your inhibitions run
In this chilled confession, bask
Proclaim your fearless affection

Flood my soul with your love
Soothing waves of ocean
In the crystal blue we are one

       -Tommy Johnson

Tell every one of the infinity
Come with me
The time is now
Tell everyone of joyous eternity
We can be free
The time is now

Reach out and touch some one
Spreading nothing but love
Out on the sea and plain
To your enemies and friends

Where truth and acceptance meet
A miraculous feat
The time is now
The gardens growing spread your love
Tell everyone
The time is now

Only all of us and we
With you and me
Friendly flexibility
The harmony that could be

Tell every one of the infinity
Come with me
The time is now
Tell everyone of joyous eternity
We can be free
The time is now

Downing whiskey that isn’t mine
The bottle’s owners’  
angry gives me a black eye
Crack it over his head now it’s a fight
You got to admit it’s a funny sight


Lost my papers, roll a blunt
Don’t call the cops you stupid ****
You can try it all you want
But you can never control us

Pound one down
Light one up
Take a tab
Now it’s time, time for the 2nd round

Acid, molly and some bud
Certain things we use for fun
Looking for kicks, thrills and shocks
Maybe we’ll get laid with some luck

Pound one down
Light one up
Take a tab
Now it’s time, time for the 3rd round
There’s an ******* rave in my head
I’m hallucinating again
I can feel my heart race
As I watch angels fornicate

Full of loathing and the fear
There’s something not quite right in here
There’s demons devouring little kids
Let’s go again

Pound one down
Light one up
Take a tab
Now it’s time, time for the 4th round

Shoot another Everclear down
We can do this coke I just found
Puke all over your girl’s night gown
Then wake up .up on the cold hard ground

Pound one down
Light one up
Take a tab
Now it’s time, time for the final round

Have you ever tried to save your life in vain?
A bullet to the brain
Your life is **** circling the rusted drain
Then you watch your self go insane
I begin to feel the judgment of my being being made by kids made from denim
So I exit the conversation

We sit pool side trying to conserve water
Falling off the wagon yet again
Packing it in
And calling it an early night
Would you pay to hear yourself sing?
To see yourself perform?

       -Tommy Johnson

Shes tired of being the peace maker for another day in paradise
Hes in a dark mood going midnight bowling
Plotting, scheming, planning dreaming
He won't make the same mistake twice
A big rig low rider
Har har snicker har!
Headed to the head shop
Dank

You egocentric snob
Talking about ecocentrism
Isocentric laser beams
Saying it's all esoteric and we're all simpletons
Mallrats
Wondering how they all got from A to B
It hurts so good
Cooking that ******'s jumbo jambalaya
Can you read between the lines on the wall in the bathroom stall written in permanent marker?
      -Tommy Johnson

When we make little cracks in the stained glass window
It means we’re away for the moment
Caught up in the yellow frost
It came over us
We are not angels
I try to rise above the madness
We are not the answer
We are out of the picture
Everybody wants it
Everybody can reach it
Come out and touch me
Forget how you lived once before
Give and get forevermore
We are the proof in the pudding
We are the bigger picture

       -Tommy Johnson

The backseat driver's lips began to chap
And his jaw locked
Thank you Based God

The people pleasers asked to hitch a ride
They had no mode of transportation
And the lack of communication coming from the backseat driver was concerning them even more

I thought I was about to be bamboozled when they started to clean the interior

I decided to pull over and check out an antique store on the side of the highway

They had used toothpicks used by President Eisenhower
The word "Anagram" in all upper case letters made of lacquered balsa wood

While we were there I tossed out all my unpaid speeding tickets  

Then I saw a sign the said "Continental breakfast $2.50!! 3 miles thata way!!"

I zoomed to the diner and ordered that continental breakfast for the backseat driver, the people pleasers and myself

We each received one coffee, one buttered roll and one danish

We all had the same irritated, sour look on our faces

We flipped the table in disbelief

Attacked the waiter and held the innocent patrons hostage with a fully loaded sling shot
And demanded the cook whip us up a gross of spinach horderves

As we left the back seat driver called shot gun
So we all pilled in with our horderves
And I gunned it to 95
The backseat driver held on to the "oh **** handle" for dear life as the people pleasers cheered me on with their mouths full

On to Massapequa

Nervously lighting another cigarette
My hands twitching and my head spinning
I look back at my trips to the city
With my first love, holding hands walking all over the island of Manhattan
Wearing my leather jacket, hoody and skull cap
Then, to my current love walking side by side holding doubt in one hand and self loathing in the other
She’s so good to me so why do I do the things I do?
I am a *****
I am a pig
I am a liar
A hypocrite
And a user
Or am I just dishonest to myself?
No not just to myself but to everyone
We walk through the Village with Scott and Tony
Laughing and seeing the street art
Drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes
Looking for the next stop of our interest
I think of the girl I’m seeing behind the curtains
Do I want her? She’s unsure as I am
Asking herself if she wants me
I don’t want me
I’ll do the same to her as I did to the others
I'll lie and build obelisks of false love stories
I was a believer in love
One and only one soul mate
But the pain changed that
Now I believe in making it work
But also free love
Or am I just a bitter ****?
I don’t know
She tells me she doesn't feel special
I don’t show her off like the one before her
It’s me not her
She gives me love, honesty good times
Social networks all blocked
No contact
Secret meetings and deleted conversations
I hide my tragic impulses
Everyone knows but not really, not at all
I kissed a man two nights ago, he wants me too
But I’m just looking for a good time
Am I just young and reckless?
Or am I stupid and remorseless
No, I’m not remorseless
I wouldn't be writing this of I wasn't
Then again this situation is just another trial
Another error, a tribulation
One step closer to finding out my limits and who I really am
If I leave her I am no better than then girl who left me
A drunken decision
A painful incision in the capillary of lust
The roads are blocked, good
I can’t make a decision without them being aware of the bigger picture
I bide my time
Time
Time heals all wounds but the scared are there until forever
My stomach is in knots 24/ 7
Constipated with guilt and indecision
I ask god, Buddha, Shiva, Jesus, Mohammed, the Greek gods, the Egyptian gods, for the answer
What do I do?
What do I fix?
How can I change?
I’m tired of crying like a little boy with a scraped knee
I need to be honest with myself
They both mean nothing but they want me
I need to find a person that means something more than just a place to stick my ****
I stick my **** in other people’s lives and **** it all up
I’m a monster, a ***** devil
I’m emotionally detached I see it now; I need to find my way back to the belief I once treasured and respected
It's all on me
But I don’t know what or who I want
I must find the pedestal and place someone up there
Or do I?
Do I really need someone right now?
Is it time?
I don’t know?
Should I just be alone with no attachments and go on doing what I’m doing?
No, that’s not solving anything
If I’m going to be alone I’m going to be alone and not look but be looked for
I don’t know why these people are in my life
I put them there
I built the rickety bridges
And what of Kathleen?
Just sending out more lies just to get my rocks off
Nope not going down that road stopping that right here
And what of Mary? Nope not doing that either
I’m learning
But now I have two
I used to have none and that made me want everything
Now I have too much and I wish I could throw it all away
Maybe the gods sent me this to make me happy maybe I should enjoy the luxury of having people wanting me
Or maybe it’s a test to see if I deserve to find the one and only, if they exist that is
In the subway I see a girl checking me out smiling; I smile back with my girlfriend next to me
I’m disgusting
I cheated on my first love seven times and never told her, she cheated on me once and confessed and left me, karma
I deserved the pain I brought it on myself
Whoever I choose I will not cheat ever again, but who do I choose?
I need more time
So I’ll take it, I'll fake it then make it or break it
Or do I chose myself and negate everything
American spirit takes me away
Back to Manhattan
The glitz the glamour, the icy winds tearing at our faces
We wait for the 167 to take us home
I can’t sleep I text the new girl and ask many questions to get to know her better to make my decision easier, it does not help
The fact that I do that just proves my weakness
I will wind up with neither I know it
The decision that the one before had to make is now before me
I feel as though I need to choose the one I’m with to do the right thing, but what is right?
What’s right for me?
Marijuana clogs my process so I won’t partake in its consumption until the decisions made and maybe not even after
Who am I kidding?
I will

Here's to absent friends
Who have to had the wool pulled over their eyes
Causing them to take unneeded detours
That delay them to their appointment at the mortician's

As their conversation went something like this...

"Who took the cookies from the cookie jar?
Was it you?"
"Yeah! And I'd do it again too!
I just want to watch the world crumble"

"Hurry, get this on tape!
We're gonna be famous!
This can't wait
The not so innocent will remain nameless"

"One lump or two?"
"Seven"

"There's no place like home"

"Unbeknownst to me, my rose has been thrown for me"

"I don't know you, but that's where you are"

"Bad form"
"Poor character"
"Unsportsmanlike conduct
Yellow card, take five in the box"

"I've spared Jacopo  
He will be my right hand man
Let's hop in the hot air balloon
And get my revenge"

Guiltlessness
Swallowed my pride and chased it with scotch
I’m here to collect my belongings

Hungry foxes
Emaciated
Crawling into the hen house

Built this stress
Out of bricks of procrastination
Boards of uninterest
Blocks of hesitation

Go forth, don’t forget your pen and paper
It’s either now or later

Trusting rivers
The earth is moving
While I unleash truths from a cigar box

Contemplate
Answering the questions
That you were too afraid to ask

Go back, and rewrite the letter
It’s either then or never

Maybe I’m wrong
Or maybe you are
Maybe I’m right
Or maybe they are

If I leave home
I’m on my own
I won’t be held back
Is it worth it?
I don’t know

I can’t take the demand and guilt tripping anymore
Won’t fake obedience, scrub the floor
Immature teenaged angst might be all this is
Or is this my path, could it be?

Where would you go? I’d squat
What will you do? I’ll find a job
Who do you know? No one
What about school/ I’ll get to that

Yeah it sounds good on paper
Is a beautiful dream
Got to go with what’s safer
I cannot leave
Take a chance
Show my hand
Or
Back out quick
Just deal and quit

If I go, if I stay
Either way it’s a path
Both are hard, both are harsh
Do I end it or do I start

No matter what I chose
I’ll find happiness that’s true
I think I know what I’ll do
I’ll stay

Think of yourself as a raindrop falling
Into a lake of sugar water on a sunny spring day
Children come to drink the sweet water
To swim, splash, dive and to play

Tidal wave laughter pours on to the grass
Made of confetti and felt
Transparent bubble clouds waiting to burst
In the sky

Look at the world in the mirror
Made out of cylindrical crystals with blue and red beads
Hear hands clapping while you sing the next chapter
Throwing candy canes and jello molds at your feet

A floating piggy bank comes from the desert
Hoping you'd join him tonight
Now you rest easy because now you know what
It's like to fly

Feel the vibration moving so fluid
Through languid locations, of perennial plants
Their petals massaging your skin, so loving
Then the wind asks them to dance

The sun smiles down on the world
As a huge rainbow boarders around
You close your eyes and inhale the eons
And let out a supernal sigh

The splitting of hairs
Anti-oxidants
Numbers that are easy to remember
And the counting of sheep

Sure enough
The Penny Pincher is bent out of shape
Clean as a whistle
And secretly queer as a three dollar bill

My life is an open book
Case closed
Looking for the special someone
Who will see my half closed casket half opened

Fast acting laxative
Are you chicken?
Reopen all the wounds
For what it's worth
Will you go by the rule of thumb
If it's all the same to you?

You try to capture my attention
By painting by numbers
The inescapable feelings
Are melting in my mouth
The worn off novelties and furtive commodities
I never thought I'd get this far, allow me to paraphrase

Divide and conquer
This is our valor
Different molds
Different shapes
Different models
Different makes
We have the right away

You try your best to preclude
Dissonant product placement
And learn the differences between emotion, feeling, attitude and mood
The art of subsumption  
Looking for a viable something or other

I am a gun for hire aiming at those who cajole
I am a gun for hire aiming at the rigmarole
I am a gun for hire aiming at the Lords and Commons
I am a gun for hire aiming at special interest groups

Oh, shock of mercy subpoena me into extinction
But not before I get a clear consensus
Of who knows that while you get played they get paid
Then let the Copperheads lay me down under my shroud

On June 15th, a Wednesday at noon

You know the cool advancements over the moon, you are self aware, you have locked the castle and you have the key
You are alive, but are you living?
New definitions of omnipotence
Add-ons to mythology and legends
Commemorate the mirages from our travels in the blazing desert
The rage is shaking Torrent Mountains
Our love is somewhere lost at sea
We’re being relocated to skid row by jubilant cherubs
Seminal Neanderthals are steadily cupping their hands to somehow try and avert their chances of getting short changed
We are living in the faded age
The sun is a soggy cancerous being
Nihilistic brigades pour out on to the bleak playing field and its side lines
Preserving the first shots on the non-guilty
Spiddles of blood on the adrenaline fuels catalyst of violence
The crickets and aphids are gassed
Birth, life, death, after life or after death
Forgo this bluff of nothingness, of course there's more
You go first into this quest; for the clarity that shatters the idea of our precipitous finales
      -Tommy Johnson