it’s seems like i don’t control my moods, but they control me

it’s hard to have a positive outlook on the future with depression
when that’s what i feel all the time

i’ve learned this past year to just be yourself and embrace it. no point in fighting it if people are going to judge you no matter what. not that it’s that easily achieved to just be you. but just doing stuff you want to not because someone else wants you to is so liberating.

there’s million broken thoughts
behind that forced smile
there’s a million broken silent screams
behind that forced laugh

tell me why everyone has to hide it
when we’re all feeling the same thing
i promise i understand what you’re going through
we’re all feeling the same thing

i know we all have a purpose
in this world
i know that you have to have darkness
in order to have light
but i’ve been in the dark for so long
if there’s one thing
i want to know
it’s if this suffering
will be worth it
because a life without meaning
isn’t what i’m living for

i feel like i can’t move
i have no motivation to
so i don’t
but laying in my bed
i also feel so powerful
and like i can change the world
but i can’t
because i’m laying in my bed
lost in my own head

i leave your office feeling like i’m on top of the world
but then i feel the world on top of me