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Taylor Jun 2014
Dear dad,

Twenty-six years ago
you met the love of
your life.

(Let’s put the fact
that you two divorced
recently aside.)

And just remember
how you felt
about her.
You told me,
“I just knew
she was it.”

Then you went on
to tell me that you
just know when you
find them.

Well dad.

A year and
one month ago,
I *knew.
i write like no one will ever read it
Taylor Jun 2014
But for once,
just once,
I want to be able tell someone
absolutely every crazy thought
that rummages throughout
my absolutely crazy mind      
and I want them to tell me
that maybe I am not insane,
that maybe I am just
and then maybe tell me
that they like
Taylor Jun 2014
Your voice grew shaky,
as mine grew weak.
“Please, tell me you’re okay.”
I could hear your car keys jingling,
you were on your way here.
I did not want to tell you that
it would definitely be too late
by the time you got here,
I was already dying,
I didn’t need to **** you too.
“Answer me, please.”
Suddenly there was sobbing,
you were growing more hysterical
by the second.
Part of me wanted to apologize,
part of me didn’t.
Because you are crying now,
tears are streaming down your face,
voice concerned.
But you could not care less
that one night at 3:32am.
I tried to tell you,
I am so sorry that you didn’t listen.
I didn’t mean for this to happen,
you should’ve told me sooner.
Don’t say it, not now.
“I’m in love with you,
please answer me.”
No no no no no.
My voice is too weak to apologize,
God, I’m so sorry.
Taylor Jun 2014
So she sat there and waited
what else could she do?

You keep asking yourself,
did you make the right choice.

Was leaving the right decision
and if it was – why?

There’s no one out there
like her.

Like the waves hitting the
sharpest and most poisonous rocks.

Like the bolt of lightening
lighting up the sky.

Like the bitter cold
of the fall turning into winter.

Like the hurricanes
that let nothing stop them.

She was everything

And there is not a girl
more beautiful,

Than one who wreaks havoc
with a side effect of beauty.

But you left didn’t you.
May I remind you, it’s okay.

Because you didn’t deserve her
in the first place.

Do not blame her,
blame yourself.

She may have lost the one person
who actually made her feel beautiful.

But you just lost the one person
who made you feel anything.
Taylor Jun 2014
i look at you like i look at poetry.

like i am trying to figure out
your rhyme scheme
or your iambic pentameter
or maybe your allusions
and the entire time
i am missing what the poem
is even about

isn't that sad
Taylor Jun 2014
As the smoke lingers off of her tongue,
you can see the smirk so evident on her face.
She traces the outline of her lips with her tongue
and gently inhales the cigarette smoke.
You can see the tiny glint of a ***** bottle on her nightstand
and the ashtray that is overwhelmed with burnt out cigarettes.
She is staring at the ceiling
and you have no idea what in the world she is thinking so hard about.
All you know is that you want to know.
And you want to know the way
her lips curve around the tempting neck of the ***** bottle,
or the way her tongue moves as she blows off smoke
from that cataclysmic cigarette she’s holding.
Alcohol and cigarettes,
that’s what everyone thinks ruins your life.
But those two things
are what saves hers.
  Jun 2014 Taylor
WiKeD LiTTle GuRl
Tonight I realized that
you weren't the one
who wrecked me,
ruined me,
or destroyed me.

It was me.

Because only I
have the power to
do that to myself.

                                        I destroyed myself
                                        by loving you.
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