Tonight I realized that
you weren't the one
who wrecked me,
or destroyed me.
It was me.
Because only I
have the power to
do that to myself.
I destroyed myself
by loving you.
I hate dreaming about you,
when I wake up my whole body aches
from being tricked into thinking
I was really touching you,
that you were really there
and you really did want me.
I don’t like waking up whenever
I dream about you because
when I turn over to the
other side of my bed
to that empty space
I’m just reminded that
you still aren't here with me
and I’m still lost without you.
You’re searching through my bloodshot eyes, trying to find me.
You’re staring right into me,
but you can’t see me clearly.
Knocking on my door,
there’s no one home
and there hasn't been for a while.
I left a long time ago,
slowly faded away without a single soul noticing
until it was too late.
You’re right in front of me
so why don’t you reach out and pull me back in?
Can you hear my desperate cries for help?
I think you’re touching my face now,
it feels like you’re trying to reach into my brain;
you’re trying to figure what’s going on inside my mind
but there’s something in the way.
Something’s taking me over and not letting you in.
Who am I?
Baby, do you know?
Do you remember who I really am,
the person I was before the poison,
the man behind the mask?
You’re staring into me with those eyes glazed over
and I die a little more with each passing moment.
Baby, I'm begging you to please save me
but I know all your efforts will go to waste.
I’m stuck sleepwalking
and no matter how hard you try,
you can’t wake me up.
I don't like change
I don't want to realize you're leaving
I don't like being without you
I don't like the emotional dependence
I want you to stay
Even if you may
Or may not
Want to be the one
I find the comfort of depression
The sweetest kind of aggression
That's how it feels
Just to know all that happens after you leave
— The End —