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Deep Feb 2021
Hope is drying up
Like a Well dries after the monsoon,
Sitting in this room, alone and aloof,
I have counted the stains on the wall,
None of it is more prominent than the
One I have with me, I'm a social pariah,
like an untouchable, polluted with death;
Run, Run away from me,
I hold death in my lungs.
Deep Dec 2020
Hope is drying up
Like a Well dries after the monsoon,
Sitting in this room, alone and aloof,
I have counted the stains on the wall,
None of it is more prominent than the
One I have with me, I'm a social pariah,
like an untouchable, polluted with death;
Run, Run away from me,
I hold death in my lungs.
Mirror, Mirror in the Heavens!
A demeanour equable to viridity,
The nascence of a lamb.
The supposed handsel from the welkin!

Mirror, Mirror in the Heavens!
A swaying of a quixotic mind,
The dance from the societal crwth;
The derogation of the lamb via gibes.

Mirror, Mirror in the Heavens!
A continual lampoon –
The spawn of a chapfallen eagle.
The brainchild of a timorous creature.

Mirror, Mirror in the Heavens!
A diagnosis of a bird in incommunicado with flight;
A late palpation, albeit.
The societal routine…
As a child, I would write letters. No, I have never been a romantic, just a rather diplomatic child. I would write letters of negotiation to a friend of mine, burn them, and let the ashes be a legible phoenix to him.

As a child, I grew up writing letters. I stopped believing in the existence of phoenixes. Either that or my friend wasn’t really a fan of one. He was way older than I’d ever be, so I was sure it wasn’t a change of taste. It was rumoured that he preferred the savour of sconces, so I kept burning my letters.

As a child, I wrote letters in desperation. I learnt the fine line between a negotiation and a plea. I pleaded…I pleaded a lot in my letters. Do you think dried tears on paper burn too? I think my friend thought it insufficient. Either that or salt water becomes invincible above the clouds.

As a child, I wrote letters. I wrote lots of letters. I wrote letters to the only one I was sure would write back in some way. I think burning those letters wasn’t such a good idea, it made him unable to read them. Either that or he forgot changing mails was supposed to be a colloquy. He’s my friend, right? He’d have replied if he really did see them…right?

As a child, I did write letters. Then I stopped. Then, then I never wrote them again until I was forced to for grades’ sake. They are the only letters I can say I got replies to. Only difference was, for some reason, each one I wrote came back with the marks of a red pen and a word beneath it all.
Aeerdna Mar 2016
My tuberculosis infected heart
spits blood
and
stays away from light
lives in humidity causing fungus growing
In my inside.

My tb infected heart caughs from all its holes
at night
it never sleeps
nevear eats
it's lost it's appetite for people and joy
and laughs

My tb infected heart will die soaked
in smoke
they'll burn its bed, its clothes
every crumble of feelings
and I will be left naked
with blood stains on my skin

My tb infected heart
lives in isolation
between walls of mirrors reflecting
the misery of my mind
It lives in fear and shame
hungrily waiting for death to come
for them to burn its bed.
TB Wayne Jun 2015
I want to drive

But to where?

I want to travel

But to whom?

I want to fight

But for what?

Without a dream my wants are empty.

Without a purpose my needs are superficial.

How do I choose a path if I don't know the destination?

Am I empty in a good or bad way?

T.B. Wayne
Farhia Yassin Mar 2015
Sad
I'm just so sad right now
I don't know if it's just momentarily
Or a general sadness about my life
I think it's the second one this time

I mean
I've had a lot of "sad moments" before
But none of them felt as real as this one
This time it's different

I am generally disappointed
In how I am living my life
Do I have a choice though?
This is my life

I did not ask for it
Nor do I control what happens in it
So, yeah
I'm just going to continue loathing my life
And being helpless about it
This is super old but I like it it's super personal
TB Wayne Dec 2014
Separated by two lives
Two different realities
The material world
And the world of inner peace

I have felt that moment of clarity
Where all is right in the world,
I have felt the pain of desire
The pain of one million heart breaks.

I want to be with my family
But this life is killing me,
I don't want to wake up
To this dismal reality.

I want to live a solitary life
One of much self love
With a calm and simple mind
To get me through the day.

I find it hard to be
The true and lovely me
Especially when I'm told
Who and how to be

I am torn between the paths,
These hard paths of love
One walk is very steep
And always filled with mud

The other is more uncertain,
Is it a path at all?
My fate is undecided
My destiny will soon call,

Maybe I will leave
Maybe I will stay,
I will take this journey slow
For my path ends bitterly every way.

T.B. Wayne
TB Wayne Dec 2014
The sky seems so dark

The moon seems so dim

The rain falls heavy,

On my tattered skin.

My eyes grow gloomy

I’m shy like the sun

I am never warm anymore

My day has just not come.

The sky does not open

The stars do not come out to play

There is no twinkle in my eye

Like lovers who’ve met that day.

One day I thought it was over,

The next I tried to begin,

Life seemed to ignore what I wanted

And I ignored every win.

I gradually woke up,

And decided to be happy,

Not because the world allowed it

But because I wanted to be free.

Free from some idea

That the world owed me

Free from all the pain,

That stopped me from being free.

When I walked outside,

Like any other day,

The sun did not shine,

But the rain came my way,

And even in that dark sky

And in the midst of pouring rain,

I began to smile,

And I never felt the same.

T.B. Wayne
TB Wayne Dec 2014
I could write a million songs

About the color of your eyes,

I could write a million poems

About the softness of your hands,

I could sing forever about your beauty,

And it will never be enough.

I could just look at your face

And know the world is going to be all right.

I could touch your arm

And calm your heart down to a beat,

I could laugh for years upon end,

Just in hopes of seeing your smile.

For every tear I shed on a lonely night,

I pray you lay there next to me.

If love is what I have

You will never have as much for me.

But if I should die

And your world would fall apart,

I would force God to return my life,

Just to love you one more day.

But as I sit here,

With you not in sight

I wonder can I live

Without you in my life.

T.B. Wayne
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