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xavier thomas Nov 2021
#30
Dear God,

I remember this day like it was yesterday. When I was only 4-5 years old, I asked my mom who lives up there (pointing towards the sky), and who lives down there( pointing towards the ground). She told me you ( God) lived in heaven with Jesus, the angels. While the devil & his minions live down below. She was the first person in my life to tell me to follow you father. To be thankful Jesus Christ died for us. Ever since then, I been curious of your mysterious ways, thinking about you daily.

March 16, 1998
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Madeleine Nov 2021
Suicide isn't the way
Talk to me, I'm here
Allow me to help
You are worth it!
xavier thomas Oct 2021
#29
Dear God,

When is enough “enough” for you?
We (your creation) have sinned, cast stones, apologize for our actions, been forgiven, felt good, then repeated the same cycles for centuries to come.
So again I ask, when is enough “enough” for you?
Or you love us that much, hoping we’ll finally get the message.


February 14, 1989
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xavier thomas Oct 2021
#28
Dear God,

When I die
I want my day to be celebrated.
No pain, no sorrows, no regrets, no sadness.
Just a big party full of fun living, breathing, healthy people who enjoy the company of genuine people.
That I be remembered as a goofy, silly, different type of unique being that has enjoyed his time on earth.
Because I can honestly say I lived & learned in this world.
And I did it all thanks to you.

October 26, 2038
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Ellis Oct 2021
I-
-want to say-
-something-
but i-
-to talk to you-
but i-
-thinking about thinking-
-too- because i-
-think-    -much-
-i meant too much-
but i-
-m just a ******-
because i-
-don’t know what to-
but i-
-see you walk away-
because i-
-didn’t- -opened my-
dumb mouth
but i-
sit-
next to you- -so close-
because i-
-want-
-want,want,want-
I really want

-talk to you-
but i-
-stumble, fumble, tumble-
over words-
-because i-
No- -i’m not-
-really-
but i- -i’m not lonely- -because i-
-convinced myself 15 different times-
-with 15 different excuses-



-so what-
-if you walk away-




I’ll talk to someone else.
xavier thomas Oct 2021
#1
Dear God,

I rather be a honest sinner and give my soul to you
expressing my truth
than a lying hypocrite idolizing a fake life in society .

February 28, 1968
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xavier thomas Oct 2021
#2
Dear God,

Thank you for waking me up this morning. Forgive me for my sins & unknown sins each and everyday.

June 20, 1994
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xavier thomas Oct 2021
#3
Dear God,

I’m mad.
Sometimes I wish you would come down here & stop the madness that goes on around here. The killing, stealing, disrespect. I wish that you would stop these bad people from harming others for their own desires.

But at the same time, how can I be mad at you? You gave us free will. You gave us everything we needed and it was certain individuals own fault that caused all of these issues to occur.
It’s s not your fault that we don’t know how to behave. I guess I’m upset because I want you to do something about it.
I’m sorry. Forgive my ignorance.

Sometimes I just wish you controlled these situations.

March 9, 1988
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xavier thomas Oct 2021
#4
Dear God,

I have days where I wish I was with you in heaven. No, I’m not suicidal. I just think about you taking my soul away as I spend all eternity with you.
But then I start to think, “How selfish of me would that be when I haven’t even fulfilled my purpose on earth yet”, you know?
I haven’t tried to change my life around. Given myself time to find out who I am or what makes me, “me”. Nor realize how it would affect family / friends to see me gone in an instant.

So thank you for not taking me away just yet. I will fulfill your request. I promise

But what is my purpose?

July 8, 1974
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xavier thomas Oct 2021
#5
Dear God,

I don’t know if you saw, but the other day, I saved someone’s life with my words. They told me they were cutting themselves to the point where they **** near killed themselves. But I came into their lives right on time, sharing my story that was very identical to theirs.
The difference between us was that I kept fighting for my life. Then I showed them how to fight for theirs so they survive.
I honestly didn’t know I had something like this in me. I mean I was just writing down how I felt.
Yet, to hear them say I saved theirs life made me cry with them happily.

Looks like you have another angel coming your way.

April 14, 2020
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