Tethered to her, it enveloped her.
No harm even though in tattered
Relics of painted thoughts she saw.

She had called for him. She held the
Hand once known, "I love you,

But from peace it was pulled and
Now not as was before, but she
Still called it **"Father,

It came down to this...

My head to heavy to lift,
my fears to big to face alone.

Tears?
I've plenty.
they spill out of me in over flow,
creating an ocean that would swallow me.
    
I had strength yesterday...

Brick walls stop me.
as they tumble only to crush me.
Why can't I get through to you?

I broke finally.
Thought you'd be happy to hear,
that I fell off my high horse.

Now all that's left of me feels so shattered,
my very essence rides the wind.

Like virtue it doesn't hold,
all of me is tainted.

Why must you make me feel like the bad guy?
Why do I have to be the villain on life's grand stage?
Why is it when things happen in my life
I'm expected to drop everything for your one strange thing? You're my mother not a nagging wife

I'm not ungrateful, like you make me out to be,
I have limits you do know that
So why do you have to keep pressing and trying me?
I love you mother but I'm cracking, I know you can't see it
But I cry inside, when you put me on a guilt trip

*******
******* for everything you took from me
my ability to make good decisions have tainted my time
And still, I wonder if you are ok.

Its time to be who I was meant to be.
Goodbye.

if you search through the rubble,
you'll still find fragments of me
tainted by thoughts of you.

I was going to be, so much more...
A little miss goody two shoes.
Someone called wholesome.
I would be the one to make them proud.
I was going to be, the light.

Instead, through life I became...
Jaded and so very bitter.
Tainted and well experienced.
I only ever made them disappointed.
It seems, I am the dark.

Once upon a time, so long ago...
I was a happy little girl.
That little girl did not survive childhood.
She was buried, deep inside.
She became lost and forgotten.

Replaced with ugliness, so long ago...*
I have ached for years.
Barriers crumble beneath the force.
My created strength, fails me.
I don't know who I am.