Just because the bottles say your name
Doesn’t mean it’s not self-medication
You don’t get to pick and choose
You aren’t curating a selection
You need to throw them away
I know you’re not okay
But you will make things worse
If you choose
To self-medicate

swaying to the rhythm of the bass
I dance the cup back up to my lips again
I close my eyes and knock the rest of the drink back
feeling the familiar burn
I smile
letting the substance run into my bloodstream
again and again and again
each round makes the world a bit brighter
the music sound better
my body more numb
my feelings more happy
so I drink and I drink
until I’m on my back
and the world is spinning
my mind is empty
free from any thought
I am at peace
floating, like a ghost
just trying to get through the night

I've half a bottle of cider
In my bedroom at home
I'll drink it, when I go back
I'll write some more
Then doubtless, switch it up, to ***
It tastes like ****
But it's a hit
And the closest I'll get to a gun
Twice as lethal, thrice as slow
It is my remedy
For all of those evil thoughts
And no one loving me
It seems, when I am drinking
My brain shuts the **** up
It lets me write
It lets me dream
And I've not thrown my guts up