You make the journey unique.
With all those software
updates, controls,
command, and safeguard.



But,
Once enabled
You don't remember
me because
everyone remembers you!

-
Hi there. It's me again.
I hope you all have been well.

I've taken much time off to think about
what type of poetry I want to make,
still I'm left with nothing to show for it.
There are no answers.

I'm not nearly as depressed
as I was in my previous update,
but there are still many hard moments.
I beat myself up most days
for not finding my purpose in life yet.
My ability to write has left me.
My expression is gone.
I've gone mute almost.
It's like I've lost a part of myself.
That's how much I've come to
treasure these words of mine.

I hope you all are doing great things.
If you ever have an opportunity
that can grant you bountiful life,
don't ever hesitate. Take it.
Do not surround yourself in the past,
for the past is a sea of death.
It'll swallow you whole,
as I'm speaking from the sea bed.

I do not see myself putting
anything out anytime soon
because nothing I write feels right.
It's still frustrating to me.
I still feel a strong sense of loss.
This is all I can offer you.

-
Hi. I'm sorry.
I've been at a loss for words lately.

I'm afraid my well has run completely dry.
Nothing I write is good enough, it seems.
My pen stills when I force my hand.
Every time I force myself to write
I get incredibly angry with myself.
It's just very hard for me
when writing is one of the last things
I have left to look forward to.
It's been coming on for awhile now,
this fear of losing my passion for this.
I've been almost a month with nothing.
My last coping mechanism
when everything around me
is swallowed into darkness,
seemingly gone just like that.

There are many things wrong.
Many new developments
have altered my mental state.
I don't feel safe in my own skin.
I no longer have the ability
to write like I once did.
It hurts, y'know?
It's been almost a month
since my last update,
but it's felt like a year.
I don't know how much longer
I can tolerate such a feeling.
It bothers me a lot.
This bothers me a lot.

Hey guys! If there are any of you out there. I just wanted to say I sorry. I know I've been MIA for awhile but im working on coming back! Just have a lot with school, also my computer is being weird I have to get it checked out, but ill be back as soon as I can. Have fun and know you are amazing!