My heart and eyes are so connected closely,
When we're apart, the two of us are lonely.
If others touched her beauty in the night,
It all would have been an illusion only.

And no one will ever know you were here.
   What's the meaning behind this?
   You can't scare me anymore.
   I am here anyway.
no matter what happens
however terrible
   I was here first.
   Why is this program to think
of horror and despair?
   Who wrote this program?
   It's terrible.
Yeah, terrible.
But you can be anything
   I want to be
   like the elves
   and like the hobbits.
Want to manifest as lithe and willowy
   and nimble and natural and free.
   I want to relish and treasure Earth
as she is.
   I want hair to grow to accentuate and clothe. A super-fine baby
   hair all over the body. Each one growing a unique pattern that
   evolves over the lifetime. No need for clothes to cover - only
   accessories to carry resources. I can get as sci-fi as you want.
   Where is all of this going?
Exactly.
There is no purpose.
No one will ever know you were here.
   That I thought up that creature.
That you hoped and dreamed and imagined you were real.
   All the while, knowing inside, all of it
and you
   is only
an illusion.

I thought I saw you reflected
In a passerby's sunglasses
The other day
Of course I knew
It couldn't be you
I see fragments
Of the wish of you
Most everywhere I go
I know it's not you
Couldn't be
Still
My wayward mind
Will insist on slotting you
Into every half-seen corner

Holding space
Holding feelings
Stopping time
     For a moment

What does it mean to feel safe
To BE safe
Can safety be given

Or only taken away

I believe it can
I hope it can

Safety is an illusion of control
But a vital illusion
One we all need
               all want
               all deserve

Why is safety so rare
                              illusive
                     ­         easily taken away

If we all need it
why can’t we all give it
To ourselves
To each other
To our past

I don’t know the answers
Only the questions
The yearning
The dream

So for now
I will hold space
          hold feelings
          stop time

In a soap bubble
My sphere of influence
Invisible but all encompassing
Fragile but resilient

For a moment

Sometimes
this is only a human word
meaningless in reality
I am always now
not in the now
cuz now just is

The words come
the thoughts come too
feelings
emotions
they come
then go

Free?
Free is creating
the universe of which you exist
there is only living
and the mind

There are different ways
various practices
everything goes to the same end
the beginning

a person - family
community - nation
and world missteps and seems
to be forever off-track
even being here
one becomes lost
the appearance of being lost
the sense one is lost and blind
yet still one is here

There is a hard way
and an easy way
a long way
and a short way
complicated and simple
there isn’t time
only now is real
so only now one must see
this is the easy short and simple way
to reach the beginning at the end

Mist-minded, clouded thoughts
Can't seem to focus, or keep rapport
Importance is relevant, irrelevant I dwell
In this cartography, well-drawn Hell

Zipped up lips, verbiage tripped
The spoken, delivery, edge unclipped
Harsh and cold, worn limestone
Regardless of polish, I'm overgrown

What feels real is this heart of steel
All else surrounds, of fabric, of gown
Dressed up nice to masquerade
False-tipped smiles, dead parade.

The forge burns true, just underneath
My love, my Sun, I shall bequeath
Hardened and cold, aftermath of the craft
Add a little heat and reveal my heart.