It was hell, but I called it love,
And the whispers of regret became my favorite sound.
Your half-hearted love is what I look for in a crowd,
The games that you play kept me hanging around.

Like a garden of roses of black and purple hue,
More of thorns that cut, leave no mark or clue.
The worst place for hearts so fearless and bold,
Yet the perfect abode for a love that's stone-cold.

Heard my name resound; did you call out loud?
Glad you need me; you know I'm not trying hard.
I held out my hand, but where are you now?
I thought you'd be here, but you're not around.

You always surprise me, was that even fun?
Staying for today, so tomorrow you'll be gone.
Oh, how could you be that despicable someone,
To a girl who just thought you might be the one?

It was entirely hell, but I called it love,
Deep down, I know, it will always be.
But a love like mine won't forever survive,
Someday, I believe, it will set you free.

I get up and I run to the sun when I'm stuck in a place that's darker than my home,
'Cause I know now I've grown I will never be alone I'll always have somebody's silhouette,
Stand and watch holding onto something I can never quite get my hands on I'm painting with pastel grey,
When my vision is blurred maybe something I heard gave me inspiration to carve my way,

Holding On

Well my story unfolds when I try to move on from the things that I've done or the things I've said,
And I know my control was the problem initially it was all just in my head,
Verse by verse it got worse my jealousy slept with me every time I went up to my bed,
Teddy bears and fear's what I held so near I watched as my tears turned to cigarettes,

Holding On

Sometimes
          Letting go
Is the only
          Thing you
Can hold
          on to.

-Sayali Parkar

we begin.
i am painted pink
and your hands are my artist.

we begin again.
and i might be hurting
and you never notice.

we begin again.
and you are running miles for the both of us
while i am hesitant to take a step.

we begin.
you and i, both shaking, letting go of holding on.

I'm forcing it
I'm forcefully holding on to a heart that wants to fly away