I can feel it,
Filling me up,
Wheeling inside me,
Pushing at my fragile seams.

It’s growing in mass,
Starting in my core
And expanding outward to my fingers,
My mouth,
My legs,
My eyes,
My brain.

It’s shutting me down,
Trying to pour out of me
As I stare off blankly at the white board in front of me.

It threatens to stream through my eyes
In helpless, uncontrollable tears.
It threatens to shoot from my mouth
In hysterical laughter.

I stare wide-eyed at the professor lecturing in front of me,
Trying to control the inner volcano erupting inside of me.
I stare straight ahead with glazed eyes
On the verge of getting up and leaving,
So I can open the valve and release all the pressure.

Instead,
I force my eyes down,
And with a shaking hand,
Finish what I started.
-ALC May 16, 2017