The Batman Movie (a review). The clues part was cool, but the end of it got boring. I liked that Batman kept a journal - I like the idea of men keeping journals, because, do men have many thoughts they share? Men’s thinking seems so ephemeral.

In this Batman resurrection, Pattinson’s Bruce Wayne & Batman are Kurt-Cobain-like emo and that seemed to work. Didn’t you just want to take your hand and get his hair out of his eyes? I think guys should have hair - I like hair on guys, not buzz cuts. I liked the muscle-car Batmobile.

I liked Zoey Kravitz, she was girl power, but not in a hot girl way, she had her own motivations, she wasn’t just in danger and served up to fuel Batman.

The movie is too long though. They need to bring back movie intermissions - I’d vote for that. As usual, I drank my giant slurpee and ate ½ my popcorn before the twenty minutes of previews were finished.

It’s a three hour movie. I had to *** so bad by the time the movie was ¾ over that I was grinding on my popcorn bucket to keep it in. I finally had to make a dash for the bathroom - I was afraid I’d miss the KISS scene. Argh!

Let’s talk about Robert Pattinson, the actor, and his arch from Twilight to Batman. Of course, doesn’t every vampire turn into a bat? (joke) but it’s always Pattinson being moody, being hot, figuring himself out and the introspective man - the broody man.

Are broody men ****? I don’t like broody men in real life - I feel that only one of us gets to be moody in a relationship - and it’s going to be me. Pattinson seems almost zany and cheeky in RL so the brood is his method act. I Like that Pattinson didn’t buff-up for the role - I think the buffed-up muscle-man as superhero perfection somehow relates to capitalism. Pattinson’s American accent was good.

What was missing from the movie was horniness. Batman didn’t seem HOT for Cat-girl - he just stood there for her to kiss. What’s boy-girl attraction if it’s not horniness? Where has the horniness gone in movies? Sexiness is missing from ALL the superhero movies - I guess the age demo is too young.

I give it three out of five stars

Trust me.
You don’t want to be with me.
You say behind my mask
I’m a human who wants to love
And be loved.
It’s not who I am underneath,
But what I do that defines me.

You want me to be Superman.
Your Superman.
But I am no super-man.
I don’t wear glasses and a suit
like I’m doing 9 to 5.
Then change into my gear
to save the world from the bad guy,
get the girl
and live happily ever after.

That’s fiction, baby.

I’ve seen death
take everything and everyone close to me.
I’ve been disappointed
by two-faced people who flip the coin
on the trust I gave them.
I’ve been broken
by many who I opened up my heart to.

I promised
Myself
I would never let it happen again.
I built my cave
to live in alone
where it’s safe
and no one to bother me.

The only time I go out to have fun
is in the darkness.
I get into fights
with any joker who ****** me off.
I party till the break of dawn
I drink til my eyes are bloodshot red
I smoke my lungs out
And **** a bunch of girls
who can help me forget everything.

But you though
You do things to me
like kryptonite
that make me feel weak.
And it scares me shitless.
That’s why I need you to stop.

You’re beautiful.
You’re brave.
You’re good.

But I can’t be with you.
I’ll hurt you
maybe you’ll hurt me.
Either way things will be ****** up.

I can’t be your white knight.
But I can be your dark knight.
If anyone ***** with you,
I’ll be your vengeance.
And if you’re looking for a good time,
I’ll give you the best night of your life.
Just flash the signal on my cell.

this is how i die an array of colours flashed
hippy's tie die shirt glamourized before me
a 60s hendrix tripping vibe
too much deception, not enough communication
silence was the biggest killer...

after all most deaths are silent
and the dead don't speak

but who says they're not listening

a record collection of conversations stored in heathe ledger's memory files , the frontal lobe archives

just like the front side of the incoming car
just like the front side of the quickly approaching cliff ledge
just like the frontal assault i planted on myself,
but my pain is temporary...it is everyone else i know who must bear it  for a lifetime if they discontinue this domino effect

(i'm not talking about domino's pizza)...pizza hut OBVIOUSLY

I ordered the extra large cheese with a side of jalapeno's because this one if going to burn with a cheesy ending

how could you miss it.... i wrote it in my death note.

Don't know what to do in this life
I guess I'll grab a knife, slice it up
And find something in the next life
Sounds like a plan Batman
Maybe when I wake up in the next life
I'll be in the body of superman
Oh goody,  you sure are the man Batman!

I'll fly in the skies like a bird
Destroy those who are cruel
Be remembered forever and ever
Wouldn't that be beautiful

Hey captain boss man, how long is my lifespan?
I don't want to wait
Don't wanna watch my life dissipate
Can you **** me now Mr. captain bossman
Oh geez Batman captain man, thanks!
After you **** me
please give my best friend my underpants
Him having them is his destiny
Thanks, now I'll die happily.

you should see me now,
dancing alone in my room,
moves as sharp as a violin bow,
a young lunatic in its full bloom.

with my fleeting interests
comics on my lap and jazz
gently displaying my awkwardness.

daredevil, deadpool and spidermann,
my only friends, well and also shazam.
okay, jokes aside, it fitted the rhyme,
dc is actually not really my choice of style.

except batman.
he is as cool as ... maybe japan?
definitely not as cool as japan.
[really not.]

© fey (25/09/19)