I feel so little,
It's so hard to keep trying
When none notice you.

She asked me why I stared at her
whenever we were seated
in the same room.
Why all my attention was focused
on her, even when hers wasn't
anywhere on me.

The distressed sound of her voice
and the lost look in her eye
are what led me to answer her question.

I stare at her because she is beautiful.
Because I'm quite aware that if I don't,
she might do something spectacular
and I would've never known.

My attention is constantly focused on her
because she is a light and I am a moth,
I must seek what draws me in:
she drew me in.

Her smile and her laugh made me swoon,
made me feel light headed,
while mine did nothing to affect her at all.

I answered her question with three simple words,
I don't know
because it's better if she doesn't know
that I find her unbelievably beautiful.
that she is a light in my dim world.

It's better if she doesn't know that I love her,
that every single day is filled with me
counting down the minutes until I can see her again.

It's just better this way,
there's no heartbreak or rejection.
Call me selfish,
but I think that I'm allowed to look out
for myself.

Look
If it were to find
And to feel it
With heavy chest
This life
This is it
Only for a moment…

(c) Ko Win Khine aka. D Hlaine (March 18th, 2016.  NYC)