How can people be so desperate to be with others, to feel other peoples attention on themselves?
Maybe it is because they never learned how to love their own self
The best person to take on a date is yourself
The best relationship to have is the one you have with yourself
The best feeling to have is to complete things with all your own effort, to not rely on someone and be fully capable of doing little and big things on your own
The world is changing, it is okay for women and men to live by themselves
Before marrying someone, be the person that you would want to marry.

It's getting late; the sun is about to set.
The sky indicates with an explosion of orange, white, yellow within a framework of blue.
I have many thoughts that swim in the hollowness of my mind.
The things of past, present and soon to be known future.
I have been a silent petal within a meadow of flowers during the only known part of my life.
My voice, only just heard in the form of soft and violent verses.
Till now I had yet to find my tongue that held a million words.
Till now I have only understood that it shall take the years to come.
Till my concluding breath is to discover all million words.

It's getting late, and I have much to learn.
The world remains in harmonious rotation with the sun.
One single memory, to be memorialised in my brain.
The sun has almost completely sunk to the earth that I am yet to see.
As I watch its last drops of life embrace at the wax coated leaf’s.
Night is near - and along will follow day.

It's getting late, with the glow-worms of the streets awakening.
Casting an ambient light on the wings of silver moths.
Swarming for guidance that shall never lead them to a home of unity.

It's getting late, with the wheels of the bus turning beneath my aching feet.
And the rush of blinding headlights cutting the dark abyss that threatens to consume humanity.
My eyes search beyond cooling glass, for a familiar sight to be seen.
For the cluster of buildings and vines and slow moving roads to once more engrossed in my vision.
And for the scent of mud dirtied water to stimulate my nostrils once more.

It’s getting late, with the hurt for home setting in.
The barrenness of family spoiling my independency.

It’s getting late; the sun has finally set behind the foreign place I leave.
Taking its art from the wall; now vacant for an artist of the night to clam.
With my heart in motion to feel the touch of family that is situated in the small of a town far from here.
My brain sorting through many things I have locked away for long enough.

It's getting late; my life from now shall never be the same.
The present now past; the once future now present.
All the while the time of life never missing a tick nor tock.

It's getting late; and I have finally accepted the person I am.
As I travel back to my home from a short time away; to prepare for the unknown.
To try and understand the future that has been approaching for the length of my life’s thread.

It’s getting late; an artist of night has now claimed the wall, arranging stars so effortlessly to shine upon all.
And I have finally gathered an understanding about the life that is seen as myself...

It was a sunday,
that I remember like it was
yesterday.
and I wished,
I could kiss your lips,
and feel you emotionally.
But the problem,
with intimacy is,
it’s mostly a two way street.
emotional or physical.
rarely both.

So I stand back,
and look at the lights,
as they hit your soft eyes,
and tell me things about myself,
I never really knew.

I took pride in the fact,
I wanted nothing,
and life gave back the same.
But as you entered,
I soon came to realize,
that everything will change.

and it did,
good or bad,
I still can’t decide.

But I wish,
I was as simple,
as coloring a page,
with crayons
and colors and detail.
anyway you want,
anyhow you want.

But I am a jigsaw puzzle,
with the pieces thrown together,
most of them missing.

You came to me,
when I needed it most.
But it’s not enough,
to rid of my ghosts.

Insecurity is a burden to be,
which is why i cling to independency.
I wish it were different,
but you are you,
and sadly,
I am me.

I'm going to have to be the one
No one else can save me,
not one human on the earth has the time to constantly be along someone's suffering side
So it'll be me, to do the duty on myself, to get through this never ending battle
& I'll be stronger at the end of it
But it's just so hard to do it alone while feeling so alone,
it even hurts to know that there are not many people who consistently reach out enough to grab  me,
to lift me up and get me going
I'll have to be the one
I'm me, no one else can do it for me,
independency
But when you've spiraled down into such a deep dark place and you try to get out,
every inch doesn't feel that much closer to the light
I fall back in the mud again
Just to fail once more
To be a failure again
To repeat the cycle again
To never get out
To be stuck
Stuck in the mud that I fell in
Thank god it's not quick sand
If it was, I'd never get out
That's how I know there's hope
There's gotta be
Nothing lasts forever
Besides life
Life is infinite
Infinity is what?
People keep on smiling and thats great,
no jealousy,  just envy for their days that keep on  going, their routines and lives that are naturally just flowing, while I space out & sit in silence and wait to disappear in a sphere that's not crystal clear
My bones ache and for gods sake,
I try my hardest to appreciate
That I'm alive today
Even though my days are grey
Getting out of bed never felt so hard
It's like I've lost all my strength &
the power of my body and mind
I'm lost, but no ones there to find me,
I'll be here to find me, there's a little hope inside of me
Reading is such a chore,
since i lose track of everything,
feeling like a bore
No energy to take care of me,
well this is how it'll have to be,
but hopefully.. this is just temporary.

Will you give me love
Will you give me comfort
Will you give me security ?

Will you care about the money
Would you give me some of your money ?
Does it matter ?
Do I matter ?

I smoke my cigarette  
That I depend on for comfort
I smoke my cigarette
As I wait for my problems to end

With a broken screen on my phone
A broken heart that chokes up my throat
With a broken life I write those words

Can I depend on you ?
Cause our love is "true"
Cause you know my life
Cause you know my fight
Cause you know I'm not fragile
But you know that I've broken

Can I depend on you ?
Can you prove my past my present as untrue ?

They say money can turn people bad
But is it only the money that they had
Or are all humans conditioned to care for themselves only
Care for their wants only
And caring for others has a limit
See I can help you but with a price
You can help me but with a price
Even this cigarette has a price
But I got nothing else to depend on
So I pay my price
I'm in debt and I dying inside

So can I depend on you
To prove what I'm saying to be untrue
Please prove me wrong
Cause I can't believe my own self
How could all those people be doing me so wrong
Independency is myth
And dependency has its price
So leave me to smoke my cigarette
Atleast the cigarette never lied
And it warned me about it price

Time
We've made up something absolutely insane
When I come across the word time, it resembles routine.. to me
It does not symbolize dawn, morning, afternoon, evening, night, midnight , twilight
I used to live a life where time was everything
I must finish school at a certain 'time'
I must have independency only for a certain amount of 'time'
I must fall in love after I've become 'successful' which takes 'time'
why
I must go to work and work and work for a loooooonnnnggggggg
'time'
If I don't finish school now,
they say I'll never do it.
because I won't have 'time'
If I have kids now I'll never live life
god ******* ****
what the **** is time
time is a ****** up concept
and I've realized that
I will do things whenever it feels right
because whenever it feels right is the right ******* time to do it
Not when someone with the ignorance to believe In time tells me it's time