God I wanna hate you,
I wanna curse you,
Yes,
I want to ram you with a concrete mixer,
And I want you to be swept away by a hurricane,
But then she appears,
She appears like a red, warning, siren, in my head.

Her smile,
Her laughter,
Her beauty,
Her everything,
Mostly,
The comfort I sense when she lays against your chest,
The same comfort I felt,
When I was the one playing on the swings of your chest.


Only because I understand the way you make her laugh,
The way you fall asleep playing with her hair,
The way you haul her into your arms and kiss her when no one is watching.

I know,
I know everything,
But I also know how it is to be snatched away from all of those,
And I want her to treasure all that she has,
Only until she loses the battle to some other girl.

In my thoughts  I scream
don't look at me
no
don't look at me
no
don't look at me the outside -- serene

In my head I dread
Inside my head I dread
Please don't look at me
don't look at me
you're looking at the living dead.

Where do we go when no one knows
where we are?

In my thoughts I scream.
Don't look at me.