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Rickie Louis Jun 2011
What people don't know,
is that memories can be haunting,
dangerous in present,
if the future your wanting,  
like ghosts of the past,
those reflections can't hurt you,
but some are like poltergeists,
that  can reach out and touch you,
and if you aren't careful,
they can grab and take hold,  
and rob what you have,
they can make warm hearts cold,
then suddenly you realize,
there are choices to make,
there are times to let go,
before you can take.
Rickie Louis Jun 2011
For me the least that I could do,
is write a little note to you,
in hopes that we had made it through,
this evening starting something new.
But just in case things don't work out,
just know this without a doubt,
that I have faith that love is true,
and love will send someone like you,
and if by chance we do go on,
just think of this as a new song,
verse by verse and word by word,
each day, each month, and year we'ed learn,
to sing, to love, and dance and play,
this song of life no other way.
Rickie Louis Jan 2012
A waking moment, when eyes first open.
Like a newborn experiencing sight for the first time.
Blinding curiosity illuminating a fight for understanding.
Pure at first, as each new sensation overwhelms the senses.
As each new day comes and goes,
turning into weeks,
months,
and years;
shaping our perspectives.
We slowly lose that sight we once had,
a forceful forging becomes of us.
Is who we are simply what we've seen?
It seems as each clip of life is impressed upon us,
we become less individual in the since of freewill,
and moreso as a carbon copy of impulses and reactions.
Lessons of life are gained after rigorous testing of wills, fates and virtues.
Mistakes as high as moutian peeks can be reached in moments,
Whilst the treck down seem to never end.
Lost deep in a forest that repeats itself,
over and over leading back to that peak.
Within these trials of heartache, triumphs, and shame.
When does redemption come to save our souls?
An awaking moment, when eyes first open.
Like a newborn experiencing sight for the first time.
Blinding curiosity illuminating a fight for understanding.
An understanding beyond the senses,
beyond what can be seen and felt thru this battle life creates.
A struggle for redemption for what has been seen and done,
in the moments before these eyes had true vision.
A redemption that is dreamt with open eyes under sunny skies,
and soundly under starlight; but it seems sometimes as tho,
no matter the destination desired for that clean slate in life,  
I find myself fixed, like a switch on the wall.
As tho we can be empowered, only to be turned off.
Is the desire for redemption caused by switching on,
and rewarded by flipping back off with oblivious eyes?
Rickie Louis Jun 2017
The ticket to happiness has a fee..
That fee is time,
time to give to others,
without giving so much you take from yourself.
It's in moving more than standing,
standing only long enough to smell the flowers.
Only looking back to reminisce fond memories;
but overlooking the pain of the past, present, and future.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
Like morning dew,
I wake in a sweat.
With tears running down,
my heart it regrets.
Her love starts to sting,
as my throat starts to swell,
with butterfly wings,
these bees are from hell.
Rickie Louis Jan 2012
There's not too many things inside this life to set you free.
The more I think, the less I know, it might be make believe.
It's truth I seek, a knowledge thirst, that I cannot quench,
The probabilities I see, like chance a mobbing lynch.
Could this be real,
or that I feel,
something that isn't so,
past what's here in front of me, to make me think I know...
It's life that's blinding,
life's what could be's,
making life mundane.
I wish my life's what's in my head so maybe I'd feel sane..
I know you think that you might know,
what I think that I know, but know that I think, what you think,
Might just be a show.
But then again you could be here standing next to me.
Together walking blindly in a world of make believe.
BFF
Rickie Louis Apr 2013
BFF
My best friend is killing me within each and every breath.
Since I was just a child it's been planning on my death.
So long as I recall it's been the only friend around,
Taking all my stress and always there to calm me down.
So many friends have come and gone alike with all the years,
So many times to pick me up and help me fight my tears.
Had I known the fight, I'd take back every strike and strife.
Escaping every anxious moment isn't worth my life.
Eighteen years has come and gone and now I'm twenty-nine.
And death should be my strongest vice to get you off my mind.
And still I sit with you my friend these days make me regret,
The moment I decided to light up that cigarette.
Rickie Louis Feb 2012
I have an undieing urge in life to roam.
An overwhelming desire to experience, and explore, but I feel so confined by city walls.
As tho I'm bound by stirrups of hollow currency and debt I didn't ask for.
Psychologically enslaved, driven like a power horse towards false dreams of open pastures,
herded by the motives of others prosperity.
Where is that life that was intended for me, it seems the very sense of freedom is bought and pacification is all they really sell.
Like a dream chaser, I say to myself, one day.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
If all were created,
before a finger lifted,
all'd be done...
Before a single word be said,
Every creeping crawling thing'd be dead.
No speaking laws, or slaughtered alters,
Or sacrificing ****** daughters.
No ill lessons, of omnipotence,
Omnipresence or deviance,
The vastness of life and time,
Are much too large, to be defined,
By one who's greatness greater than all,
To know we're here, or rule at all,
It's too far fetched to believe it's true,
There's one above, all around, watching you.
And say a god of sorts is real,
Say christ is god what would you feel,
To know his book is spoken true,
To be applied in all you do,
Word for word and verse by verse,
Forever there to be rehersed,
With jealousy and angry might,
His reasons are, beyond our sight,
His omnipotence we can't define,
His intelegence, beyond our mind,
******, ****, and slavery,
plagues and death, so hard to see,
The fact he made this all for us,
From each bright star, and nucleus,
just to cast us in a pit,
A fiery hell, a suffrage.
None of it, It makes no sense,
And think most don't believe in chance.
Now close your eyes, and just believe,
Blindly follow each page you read,
For faith is something you must have,
To not see past this broken path,
Of lies and hopes in false intent,
It's god who man came to invent.
Here's a law he wrote himself,
One of ten, to show us help,
And thou shalt worship one alone,
But now there's christ who claims his thrown.
A contradiction from the start,
O how this truth broke my poor heart,
He created all in just six days,
A sabbath rest I'm so amazed.
A day to gods a thousand years,
So look at this, And shed no tears,
He made us in all knowing ways,
But so confused within just days,
He changed his mind, his laws and story,
Then sent one down to claim his glory,
Then Lucifer, what was the point,
His purity, god did anoint,
Then jealousy and pride bestode,
But then again god had forebode,
Let alone freewill was not,
An angel had no choice to taunt,
Made to fill specific needs,
The devil had no other deeds,
God knows all, from start to end,
So if he's real, he's not a friend,
He doesn't love, or know all,
Or have salvation, when we fall.
A deity he is not,
Especially with how he taught.
There're better ways to plan a path,
Simplicity is easy math,
But who am I, I'm just a man,
Created by his clumsy hand.
I didn't wanna stop writing this one! So much to say on this topic.. Thanks for stopping by, I have plenty more to read if you enjoyed this. :) Don't forget to like or comment!
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
I could tell you of a story, of this flower that I saw.
Growing in a little crack, this flower had it all.
It's beauty got me thinking, how ****** we forget.
It isn't where we come from, it's that we never quit.
The struggles that this flower faced, no quiver nor a fall.
It rose above the chances,
through this crack that was so small.
The only will was life, and the chance that it may "be".
Exist in ways intended, and truly live as free.
This dandelions beauty, gives me the strength to know,
content with where I'm rooted, 
 and will to always grow.
Rickie Louis Jun 2011
The cold reality of life,
is that it's completely unfair,
the cards we're dealt,
like a losing pair,
some of us,
we can never win for loosing,
hell some of us,
can't even try to live by choosing.
It's like some of us were born in a cruel deficit,  
with an impossible expectation to just climb right out of it.
It's like trying to win a predetermined losing battle,
with all odds against us,
climbin up a broken ladder.
Rickie Louis Jan 12
Mysterious shadows on the wall.
Silhouettes detached from their source.
Just a void of light.
An outline often depicting,
the same that could be said
about some of us.
Detached from our source,
void of light.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
There's a yearning in my soul. A sudden dramatic anticipation. To connect, to reflect, to know your joys and woes. Your sorrows and your hopes.
Even for a day..
A minute..
A moment..
A memory to behold!
I don't expect forever, truly forever is untold, but life has unexpectedly introduced our weary souls. Bestow to me your story. I promise I'm no judge. I am too a victim seeking nothing more than love. A piece of me I'll give you. I'll surly accept yours. To feel in life is purpose, to neglect that is absurd.  Let your heart be open, let it carry you away. The pain you've too long squandered, let's relinquish it today.
Forsaken as we are. Despite our pieces scattered adrift this lonely road. We are still yet hopeful, daydreamers may we be, come to me within your sleep. Let me hold you as you close your eyes, as you slip into this thought, no matter the distance, feel me. A fairytale perhaps. Do we not deserve just one? Take this piece of peace. Find solace and let it thrive. Let this moment be, and long into the next to be a guide. The worst at most will this just fade. The best at least is an eternal embrace.
EH.
Rickie Louis Mar 2013
EH.
Nothing is sacred,
nor does it last forever.
No two can make it,
without hearts being severed.

Desperation plagues,
once truth in lies unfold,
neglected love evades,
once blame is what takes hold.

love begins to pass,
like the petals of a rose,
once given to a lover,
when two hearts began to grow.

Promises are broken,
once they pass thru lying lips.
love cannot be spoken,
or be grasped with finger tips.

Eyes are bound to wander,
if they aren't fixed soul to soul,
and sinking ships are destined,
once relationships turn cold.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
I'm so stricken, and I don't know what to do.
Like a sickness is killing me,
I'll blame it all on you.
There's a feeling deep inside of me,
That's clawing its way out,
and the pain I can't handle it,
this monsters name is doubt.
He's a beast who stays caged,
with his brothers down below,
within recess of my mind,
and the dungeons of my soul,
jealousy and anger and pride to say a few,
if their free in your mind,
their whispers will consume.
and they come as their called,
by their name they break free,
running rampid like a truth,
it's the truth thats killing me.
Eve
Eve
Do night skys not liken to the shimmer of her eyes?

Do the gardens of Eden not bloom in the presence of her beauty?

Do heavens angels not fall
just to hear her sweet goodbye?

Yet her lips press softly upon mine.
All of life
Is confined within a single moment
Despite that as it may sound
So small or insignificant
It's indeed profound and eternal
I imagine all that have come and gone
In search of purpose and meaning
Over looked the simplicity of lifes beauty
That is to simply exist
Enjoying the whoas and woes
Sinking and rising
As the tides of life come and go
Not fighting or subduing
What is or isn't meant to be
Complacent, content, cohesive
As the matter that forms us all
Because ultimately
Nothing matters at all
So here we are
Existing
Can I exist with you?
It's instinctual
To want to look away
Once contact is made

Often it's what I do
Impeding anxiety
That they may first

I want to peer deep
Beyond the ambiance of blue
Connecting to within, you

It's not what I see
But what I feel
Pith to crux
Eye to eye
Rickie Louis Nov 2019
I use to plead with fate. Begging and wishing; praying and hoping for things to change. I'd always try to compromise. Almost always blind to one thing. Action. Always neglecting my basic necessities, in exchange for inaction; possibilities, for idleness.. Always focused on the moment. Lacking foresight for progression. All of my life I have simply digressed.
Rickie Louis Oct 2012
I'm not a wishful thinker,
but with the cold reality,
faith seems to be the only warmth in life..
Then again I'd rather be cold than lie to myself.
Rickie Louis Oct 2017
Once we were both peasants
With my intent to be her knight
With haste I crowned my queen
As her king she'd rule my right
Yet now her noble jester
I've performed with all my heart
With hope I'd be an equal
Though a pawn right from the start
Off with my head
Rickie Louis Jun 2011
I smell something and it really stinks,
like truth from liars,
I cant believe.
It's putredness defying spray,
it's lingering won't go away,
it follows me,
I cant allude,
and all my friends they can't subdue,
their noses burn,
and eyes they water,
water yes I need some water,
to clean my self,
and start again,
cause people don't like filthy friends.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
Sometimes,
There are no lyrics for this song inside my head.
so it's best sometimes expressed in my own words,
instead,
of using others expressions, mine's as well,
so I'll place each word on these lines as my pens,
compelled,
to try to draw exactly what I want to show,
so please keep up and follow if you really wanna,
know,
or shake your head and smile, or simply just pretend.
imaginations greatest when you're only playing,
 friend,
is what you call yourself, in times that you need.
not exactly being one within your selfish,
 greed,
is what I'm seeing now as I begin to speak,
listen to me dearly now my hearts becoming,
 weak,
is what you call me now within my time of need,
friend is who I tried to be when your hearts who I,
 feed,
me full of ******* with your insincere concerns,
cause in the end I'll be here as this bridge you try to,
 burn,
it all away and stand there sifting thru the ash.
I tried to ***** the fire as you quickly stuck that,
match,
me with intentions and perhaps you just may see,
that life can be more meaningful without some,
 fallacy.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
Before you know, you're in your thirties,
Recalling all the days that'd come and gone,
Immixed with nostalgia memories,
Tedious friendships that lasted,
Temporary ones that passed,
Although it's difficult to differentiate,
None I've had with real substance,
Yet here you are, always there...
Picking me up from my self desolation,
Reassuring that I have some value,
Insisting there's worth,
Commiserating my woes,
Everything that defines a friend.
I appreciate you, even tho I'm so self-absorbed.
Rickie Louis Apr 2013
Primordial network,
networking mycelium,
mycelia working,
working primitively,
primitive connections,
connecting chemically,
chemical reactions,
reacting pleasantly,
pleasant visuals,
visual enhancements,
enhancing hallucinations,
hallucinating vividly,
vivid reality,
reality bending,
bending light,
lightly colorful,
coloured full,
fully spiritual,
spirit elevated,
elevated God,
Gods flesh,
flesh Devine,
Devine mind.
A lil myco word play, enjoy.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
Love is but a game I've never played..
But through you,
I've learned all the ***** rules..
Game on..
Nice guys finish last..
winners play the game.
Rickie Louis Jul 2011
I am greedy,
Greedier than greed,
Motive lies,
Behind each deed,
All I do,
That motivation,
Is to,
Receive,
One thing,
It's behind,
My being,
My smile,
My hello,
All my well wishes,
It's all that I know,
It's my worth,
To me,
It's first,
More than gold,
It cannot be,
Bought,
Stolen,
Or sold,
It is very rarely,
As it seems,
And when it's not,
It plagues me,
It's my own,
Heart disease,
I do not disagree,
I deserve this,
With all my greed.
Love
Rickie Louis Feb 2012
Imagine grass,
tall bright green grass.
Each individual blade,
Swaying freely in everlasting fields.
Harmonious, peaceful, simple.
Now imagine,
a lawnmower,
loud,
demanding,
ruthless.
cutting down,
grooming,
and controlling the grass.
No more does it sway freely.
Religion is my lawnmower.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
Impetuously copacetic,
as a zephyr to the soul,
with chills she'll send,
feels good till end,
but soon you're left there cold.
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
I just saw a humming bird,
   Whispering a humble word.
     You say, "no, that's so absurd,
       to be humbled by a bird,
       let alone it whisper words".
     Delusional as it may seem,
  This bird it whispered things to me.
Said, "take it slow" with humming wings    
"Abolish all unneeded things".
   Said, "life is now" as it zoomed by,  
   "Without this nectar life'd be dry"..
     said, "take a drink and take it slow,
    let it sit then let it flow.
  Tickle your tongue, and soft your humm, Simplicity will keep you young".
Rickie Louis Sep 2011
There are times that I believe,
               and times that I'm deceived,
and there are times I believe I'm deceived.
Rickie Louis Jul 2015
The road is paved with emotional landmines encircling my every move.
And every sign that comes down this highway seems to remind me of you.
Almost as though I have been down this road, but the view is all but the same.
I'm not driving in circles, but some how it swirls back into painful war games.
Explosions, implosions, dismembered emotions at what point will it all end?
What do we gain when love turns to pain and hearts can no longer mend.
A friend gave me a line and told me it was the start of my next poem. So this is what it is.
Rickie Louis Mar 2012
My leaves have fallen color gone,
this season sings a sorrowed song.
Each branch and finger lingers bare,
where once a luscious life was shared.
With every breeze that passes thru,
within cold nights of bitter blue,  
and as each leaf makes it below,
this truth in life feeds me to grow.
I'll sit and wait,
fight thru
the gloom,
cause soon
I know new
life will bloom.
Rickie Louis Jan 2012
It seems as we get older, a piece of us gets lost.
Desires fill our hearts, it seems those pieces are the cost.
What must we do to find them, or fill that broken void.
Do we ever get them back, or are they just destroyed.
As age creeps up, and time ticks by, and awkwardness begins,
It's hope I find a heart like mine, who's pieces just fit in.
An old unfinished thought..
Rickie Louis Jul 2019
Most relationships seem so lifeless, just floating along aimlessly. Down desolate mundane oceans. Destined to be consumed by the dark fridged depths we call love.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
I relish the best in you,
Endured the worst,
Now you're gone,
My love's dispersed.



long-suf·fer·ing
adjective
adjective: longsuffering
having or showing patience in spite of troubles, especially those caused by other people.
"his long-suffering wife"
synonyms: patient, forbearing, tolerant, uncomplaining, stoic, stoical, resigned; easygoing, indulgent, charitable, accommodating, forgiving, understanding

in vain
phrase of vain
without success or a result.
"they waited in vain for a response"
synonyms: unsuccessfully, without success, to no avail, to no purpose, fruitlessly
"they tried in vain to save him"

*
Rickie Louis Jun 2011
Love is complicated,
somewhat like a seed,
with out the proper nutrients,
that plant won't grow and breed!
I want to be your soil,
free of all the weeds,
I want to be your sun and rain,
without impurities.
I pray someday I'll have it,
Someday I will see,
time is all I'll ever have,
to plant my litte tree!
My first poem.
Rickie Louis Nov 2017
Hearts perish for the devil,
For heavens in her eyes..
Rickie Louis Nov 2017
I miss the way you use to giggle at me,
face down, 
grinning, 
eyes drawn to mine..
intrigued and blushing by my dry passes and poetic rants..
I miss the way you'd hold your body pressed firm to mine,
after a long day, 
like you'd not seen me for weeks..
I miss the way you'd seek my hand, caressing..
I miss when you'd call me with excitement when things were right, 
or when wrong and needing reassurance that all'd be well,
or just to see how my day was going.   
I miss the times we fought,
but made up...
sometimes passionately...
I miss being able to write the words of my heart,
and my mind, 
and seeing in your face it reached you... at the depth I'd aimed.
I wish that you could see in me not just this man I was,
or the man I may just never be,
but as the man I am.. 
dedicated to you..
worth loving too..
I miss that when we did something weird,
we'd always apologize,
even if it was nothing..
because we cared..
I'm sorry..  
I miss when you loved enough to restrain..
to reply..
to make time..
to be mine..
and I be yours..
I miss passing new music that touched you or I in a way, 
to connect, 
then reflect, 
like I'm doing today..
my muse..
You use to love my figurative ways,
my many points of view,
my romantic aspirations..
you once agreed more than oppose..
At what point do you decide to no longer try?
I need to know..
so I can give up too.
so I can stop loving you..
I miss you.
Rickie Louis Nov 2014
I feel apart of me's gone missing,
I don't care if it comes back.
The love I have's bled empty,
I'm afraid it's turning black.    
                                              
I'm finished always wishing,
With beggars knees so sore.
The shooting stars are missing,
My hope is gone for more.      

I find I'm always focused,
Dwelling further down a hole.
As misery is lurking,          
I'm a broken hearted mole.
                                                                
I'm blinded and I'm searching,
By the one thing I can't find.
It's a warm place for my heart,
But it's messing with my mind.
Sorry for all the sappy poetry. It is what it is I guess.
Rickie Louis Apr 2013
She said to me go,
without hesitation I left her standing there,
without hesitation our hearts collapsed.
Rickie Louis Jun 2011
We have our allotment,
our bit and our share,
an instant, a moment,
it can seem so unfair.

I'm running and chasing,
I'm trying to subdue,
theres no way to stop it,
it can quickly allude.

It's often just wasted,
or squandered away,
and feel so eternal,
like a long lonely day.

The cost,
you can't buy it,
and it's easily misused,
It's treasured and priceless,
and can never be reused.

No matter,
how badly,
you try and hold on,
you can't even touch it,
then it's suddenly gone.

So just make the best,
and do what you can,
sieze every small moment,
in this very small span.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
i know how i look
with my rose tented glasses
im not naive nor gullible
just convincing myself to believe
i know it's a set up
pehaps a little foolish
but the highs i reach
are worth the lows beneath
there's nothing that can stop
how i wish to see
i would rather not admit
the sad truth of reality
Rickie Louis Jan 2017
No depth,
you're hollow,
you're empty inside.

It's no wonder you wallow...
Society has you,
you're destined to follow.

Adrift and aimless,
pathetic and nameless,
you're not even shameless,
with shame you're aware,

but you're not..

You can't even care you're so self diluted,
you're blind as a bat,
and your conscience is muted.

Let's hear you refute it..

Despute it..

It's all just a game, I know.
Another song and dance to show.

I'm not impressed.
Not in the least.

I get it.

Lifes your buffet,
and it's all you can eat,
but retreat,
and know I'm no feat,
I repeat,
you will never defeat,
with a virtue to cheat.
You're merely transparent with all that deceit.
A girl I know.
Rickie Louis Oct 2011
One heart,
born in whole,
Free from all captivity.
Not a slave,
nor care,
Beating for one,
Myself.

Two hearts,
one of the other,
made to feed and grow.
Beating for me,
Mother.

Torn hearts, inseparable, separated.
Lost to the world,
by choice of deception.
The curse begins.

The seeking heart,
Beats for another.
One piece lost,
Destined to recover.
Absent of nurture,
Wicked, wicked,
Stepmother.
Repelled, repulsed, shamed.
Uprooted,
over and over again,
Homesick.

Adulthood,
weirdness and awkward.
With a childs desperate heart.
Hopelessly hopeful,
Helplessly lost.

Found love,
Beautiful love,
lasting love.
My lover,
Deception, infidelity,
Another piece lost.

The cycle continues.
The seeking heart,
Desperate to replace,
What was lost long ago.
Ten times over.

Realization, awakening, awareness.
This piece left,
Peace of heart,
Beats for one,
It's my own.
No longer captive,
Nor a seeking slave.
This last piece,
Freed for me.
My first, non-rhyming poem. Enjoy, my love summed up! Please feel free to critique or compliment!
Rickie Louis Jul 2015
There's an apple in a tree that I want so miserably
and I jump and I climb, but I just can't seem to reach,
and I know everyday that the tree's a lil taller,
but that apple is so red and it isn't getting smaller.
So I try even more and I give it all I've got,
while I imagine how it'd taste and I know it'd hit the spot.
Then one day the apple falls upon my weary feet so tired,
just to hold it in my hands only to find it had expired.
It is then I look around
just to see how easily
it'd had been to take a moment
and see other apple trees,
because I've been within a forest
and my stomach had deceived me
and my eyes they had ignored it,
just to get that one to please me.
Rickie Louis Dec 2018
Curiously wide eyed,
flawlessly pale skinned,
mysteriously dark haired,
beauty.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
I don't think of you anymore...

Except for when I close my eyes,
you fill my dreams..

Before I close my eyes to dream,
it's only you for my heart screams.

No more than that I do assure,
I've finally rid you of my core.

Except my day,
here and there,
your smell,
a sound,
a touch,
I swear.

It's easier,
aside all I've said,
you're no longer here,
not in my head.

Besides the morning when I wake,
my heart it quakes,  
please take this ache.

I know I lied..

I cannot deny..

You're locked forever inside my mind.
Goodbye.
Rickie Louis Dec 2016
To have you in my dreams..
devoid of just a touch..
is but a nightmare..
a barren land..
my destitute.
Rickie Louis Apr 2018
The times I miss you the most,
Immensely.
I rid myself quickly by remembering how you made me feel,
Intensely.
Despite my will for you and I,
You often made my heart run dry.
I went from darkness,
To light.
Desperate,
To flight.
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