being far away from you
brings back what once fade a little
just like staring
at dusty window on a rainy day
reminds me of
how much i miss the sun

or
soaking my feet
into piled up snow
reminds me if
how cold
you could ever be.

To my future children,
nothing in life comes easy
you will hear these words all the time.

To my boys,
treat the world with a gentle touch
be kind
do not let others
teach you the ways in which
they think boys ought to be.

To my girls,
i say the same
but in this cruel, cruel world
remember that you breathe fire
for that is the only way
you will make it out alive.

To my DAD,
I’m sorry for being born
I’m sorry for being a girl but you know all my life I’ve tried to be a boy to you, as you always wanted but God didn’t gave you one
I’m sorry for being such a failure in life
I’m sorry for being a burden to you and mom, especially to you when mom passed away 3 years back
I’m sorry for being angry whenever I see you drinking alcohol and in the end you’re unable to stand straight. You see I’m more concerned about your health because I know the disastrous effect alcohol have on you and also it is the reason that my concept of a perfect family is ebbing slowly.
I’m sorry for telling you NOT TO DRINK ALCOHOL TOO MUCH
I’m sorry for yelling at you when you start to drink as I know you’ll crave for more after one bottle
I’m sorry for being angry when you invite your friends and your family over to drink a lot of alcohol because I know they are just momentary friendship and familial bonds, when you’ll fall ill nobody of the group will come to your help
I’m sorry for being so brutally honest when I tell you what effect of this new behavior of yours is affecting our relationship and also those of my sisters
Moreover I’m sorry for all that happen yesterday night : for telling you to go to bed and scold you like a child because you can’t wake up enough to walk to the bedroom
I’m sorry for helping you to stand and take you to your bed
I’m sorry for removing the glass from your hands and suggesting to carry it for him to his bedroom because of his inebriated state
I’m sorry because of me you’ve gotten angry and broke the glass into millions of tiny crystals on the floor
I’m sorry for caring too much
I’m sorry for thinking life is like a bed of roses and as long as I have my parents love I can overcome anything
I’m sorry for hoping you loved me and still do despite all this
I’m sorry for being a hurdle in your path to live your life fully. Though I would never understand how a child can be a hurdle as I was lead to think that a child is the greatest gift that GOD can give
I’m sorry for being unwanted
I’m sorry for not having the courage to end my pathetic life and remove myself from your path
I’m sorry for constantly trying to gain your attention, you see I yearn normalcy in my life where everything is fine, I have a loving father, perfect life and all

EVERYTHING WAS MY FAULT, I’M REALLY SORRY DAD ……..