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Owen Carter Apr 2018
Endless storms inside my mind
Ravaging and tearing at my very soul
Wearing down my will to survive
A selfish desire developed so strong
To release this agony
And pour out my sorrows
With the edge of my knife
I take a slice and watch
As the crimson ink flows
And writes these words I speak
My whole being tortured by thoughts
And the world around me closing in
Pressuring me to submit to life
A resistance floods over me
A life I can't live
A life I can't imagine
A life too strong
A life too overwhelming
A life I can't bare to live
And it would all come down to a decision
Owen Carter Dec 2016
I can't see a thing
The darkness is overwhelming
I can't move
Not my arms, not my legs,
Not my head, not even my eyes,
Or, at least I don't think I can.
I can't tell.
Hell, I can barely think.
That's it! Hell! I'm experiencing Hell!
Though, I'm not sure if it's figurative or literal,
But all I know is that I'm in Hell.
Though, I don't think Hell would be this tight.
Maybe I'm not in Hell.
I don't even know if I'm breathing.
I can't feel it.
I can't feel anything.
I can't see, I can't move,
I can't feel, I can't breathe.
I've figured it out.
Dead. Yes, I'm dead,
and all I've got left are my thoughts.
This must be Hell.
Owen Carter Dec 2016
A blank sheet, full of potential,
so much beauty lies within.

A blank mind, calming the soul,
Though it doesn't feel right.

A blank day, full of nothing,
At least it feels like nothing.

A blank life, full of despair,
It all just seems blank.

Nothing.
Nothing is there.
Just a blank face
In a blank world.
Owen Carter Dec 2016
It may start with not wanting to wake,
Soon progressing to not doing homework.
Grades dropping,
Self esteem toppling.
You feel dumb, and then you feel numb.
You think "Is any of this even worth it?"
You're filled with doubt as you begin to pout,
But then you remember the small things.
When your favorite band comes on the radio,
When you finally draw that second eye correctly,
The sound of applause at the end of a play.
Even as simple as that new episode of a show you watch.
And then you ask once again: "Is any of this even worth it?"
And it truly is.
Owen Carter Feb 2018
Everything was dark
Not a living soul in sight
Touch starved and broken I wander the abyss
Praying to a god I never believed in
Please just someone come to help ease my pain
To help ease this insufferable loneliness
The only solution to end the pain is death
But my desperation for interaction prevents it
I scream out into the emptiness, unable to be heard
No walls to bounce off sound waves
Just an endless field of pitch black dread
My only companion my thoughts and my impossible shadow
I stand silent in the darkness
Hoping for a soul come to me
But not a single soul is in this wretched place
Not even my own
Owen Carter Dec 2016
I couldn't even begin to count them all.
Hundreds? Thousands? More?
There was no way of knowing.
Each one was a brilliantly sculpted freckle
That laid upon the night's dark face.
Each hundreds of thousands of light years apart,
Yet all come together as a beautiful painting in the sky.
Each one so much more immense than what meets the eye.
Trillions of moments, millions of lifetimes,
All trapped within a single glance.
Owen Carter Sep 2017
I love it when she wears my hat,
I fell for her right off the bat.
She towers in height,
A few inches more.
When I hear her voice I'm as high as a kite,
If love were a currency I'd never go poor.
All I want is for you to love me too,
And hope your heart has the same plan I do.
Owen Carter Dec 2017
An autonomous program written for all,
The margin of error is rather quite small.
A day to day basis I go through my week,
Without any error it's bound to repeat.
The automatic smile when passing a stranger
Believe it or not the code is in danger.

A fault in the code that lies in my brain,
At first I feel normal but then feel insane.
The code is so broken that nothing seems real,
How could it be when this is all I feel?
Day in day out a feeling of nothingness,
Most mark it off as me being a pessimist.

It all meshes together and all feels the same,
All I want is to get out of this sick, twisted game.
No changes in schedule is really quite boring,
But the thought of change is super abhorring.
I look at my friends and know I should care,
But in the end my mind is just bare.
Owen Carter Jan 2019
Blue skies and apple pies
Football games and guns to aim
40 hours of work and fireworks
Heteronormativity and conformity
White tranquility in the midst of police brutality
White terrorism claiming nationalism
What is the American Dream?
Shutdowns and cages and riches for ages
Fascism raises from hateful rampages
Families taken away from their own
These are a few of Trump's favorite things.
What is the American dream?
A flag always at half-mast
In preparation for the next mass shooting
Killing the poor with a minimum wage
That can't even afford rent
Mocking the people we stole this land from.
America the land of the free
Construct of the patriarchy
Thousands of dollars in medical bills
Treating our oceans like landfills.
Oh say can you see by the dawn's early light
A country so broken the end is in sight.
Capitalistic ideals that possess the rich
Destroying the poor as we're thrown in a ditch
Together we must rise above
And show Trump's cult what we're made of.
Owen Carter Dec 2016
Friendship when school ends is like the leaves of a tree:

Spring begins, trees filled with healthy green leaves,
As does friendships within the year.

Summer is the end.
You fill the leaves with hope,
You love these leaves,
You've always intended to keep contact,
But inevitably, Time does change.

And Autumn comes,
And these leaves that previously you had so dearly loved
Start to fade away.
You didn't intend on this,
You were so eager to keep in touch,
But people change, as do leaves.
The once vibrant green you had known and loved
Transform into an ugly unfamiliar brown,
As you desperately cling to these leaves,
Hoping for them to stay this beautiful green you once knew.
Soon you are just standing around these empty trees
That were once so familiar to you,
But now around you all these dead leaves.

Then it's Winter,
And these leaves slowly fade away
Behind blankets of white,
Never to be seen again.
And you just stand there, surrounded by nothingness.
Cold and alone.
Owen Carter Dec 2016
The end of school is closing in
The time to put up your pencils and pens
The end comes closer week by week
Each day passing kids shriek and shriek
The end of summer follows it
Bit by bit
The glow of summer dies
And then the school year flies
The end of school is closing in
That's the way it's always been.
Owen Carter Dec 2016
Roses are red,
But also different colors,
One isn't even like any other.
Violets aren't blue,
Violets are violet,
Is that so hard to do?
I guess they chose blue just for a rhyme,
Not lilies or lilac or the spice thyme,
But "Violets are blue", is that such a crime?
Whoever said it didn't have to use blue.
There are other colors that rhyme, like green,
But "Violets are blue"? that's just obscene.
Owen Carter Apr 2018
Who am I but another statistic
Destined to be the next trending tag on Twitter
More martyrdom made for the minority
Hated for who I am and as they think I chose to be
Who am I but another snowflake
Bashed and beaten for my identity
Invalidated for who I know myself to be
Fearing each day that comes to pass
Who am I but a name that doesn't feel my own
Confusion rattles my brain
As I stare at the name I've known my whole life
So close to me yet so unfamiliar
Who am I but myself
As no one else chooses to see

— The End —