I felt bad today
Enough to almost throw my life away

In one split second the decision was made
To wait it out, just one more day

I wait for these feelings to go away
I forgot how to be happy, forgot how to play

Today I woke up
Happy with my choice
Glad I didn't listen to my inner voice

I thank the Lord i made it one more day
I know now I can do this,  I'll be ok

And here we are again,
Stuck between sad and lonely.
What is wrong, darling?
The world is right outside.

And here we are again,
A dance with the frightful and dark.
It is only your own thoughts, sweetie.
Can you not feel the warmth of the sun?

And here we are again,
Numb, and life foreboding.
How much more can you take, honey?
Cant you see the hand extended toward you?

And here you are.
Cold and lifeless.
Not much has changed.
Except now the world around you feels your pain.
Is this really what you wanted, love?

And here I am again.
Stuck between sad and lonely.

Your lips tasted like nicotine
Your hair smelt like rain
What really dragged me in was that
In your eyes I saw pain

I wanted to fix you,
I wanted to love you,

How could I help
When I'm the one who needed help

I should've fixed myself first,
I should've loved myself first,

Now my veins overflow with nicotine,
My hair smells like rain,
The worst part is that,
When I look in the mirror, all I see is pain.

I wish for the day we find someone who doesn't have to play pretend,
who sees my scars,
and softly presses their lips to every single one,
not to erase them,
but to simply accept the parts of me I am not proud of,
as they are,
as I am,
and then last they will take their lips and rest them on mine,
not to erase me,
but to colour me for the rest of time.