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I'm so unhappy
being this being
of unresolved
uncomforts and broken
unrealistic dreams
of wanting to be a new
something without a way
of becoming
it's this pain so deep
even I can't reach it
in a place where only I can feel it
and I smile and wave
while people say
"wow, she looks so happy"
but I fake so much
I almost think it's real
and then I'm reminded
with a tear stained window
that I've never been so unhappy
depersonalization.
Some places in me
Are hollow
And if you press too hard
I'll cave in

I don't need empty reassurances
Of my wholeness
Just acceptance
Of my vacancy

But please know
That barrenness
Does not mean less
When it comes to loving you
"Trick or Treat"
Clamorous voices demand at the door.
A cry that you've heard so many times before.
You open the door face plastered with a grin.
Wishing you could cull this rabble and stop
their screeching babble.
Sweets doled out,  "be safe" you shout at their backs,
after all you wouldn't want to be hacked by a ******!

Knock-Knock**
Its sound echoes all around.
You hate these midgets at your door
looking cute and asking "give us more"
You'd love to keep the door closed,
but well then you're known as the weird house.
So adjusting face and keeping pace you open the door,
only to be heard of no more.
© JLB
31/10/2014
13:16 BST
I didn't mean to kiss you.
I just happened to fall in love.
Notes (optional)
Drunken texts and phone calls at 3am
Forbidden fantasies of you and me
Stumbling through the city to find where you might be
It's all a trick isn't it,
An impossible dream.
Your apartment door shakes,
Oh it aches for me.
Taxi cabs being forced to drive.
You send me away,
No. Not tonight..
Lipstick kisses and tired hearts.
I always take it that little bit too far.
I shouldn't have gotten so drunk that my feet forgot what they were doing.
I walked to your apartment in the middle if the night and made a fool out of myself..
Sorry.
You unlocked my heart and invited me in
You whispered so slightly
That tickled my ear
'A little spark kindles a great fire within'
Once you got the blaze going
Deep in my soul
That tickled down to my toes
Delve into all my being,
This night I realized
You are my hint of sherry
My cup of loneliness
With lots of steadying breaths of regrets
My hand reached towards heaven
Waiting for the spark I will receive ....
___________________________________________
*The spark that kindles the fire in you
Was lit by the gust of wind
That kissed your soul sighing
Igniting the embers that were dying
You failed to see or feel…
The flame of eternal love
Was what the heavens threw
Fusing your nights into mine,
As my fingers reached to grab your sadness
The knuckles and digits entwined,
The sherry, your cup of loneliness,
I took away…
Spilling each blood’s droplet of mine
I was there each dawn,
When you woke seeking a brightened morn,
You missed what that little leaf saw
Laughed over…smiled
That drop of dew glistened in my presence
In that little droplet of rain that formed the rainbow
I arched over you, protecting you so tall!!
She cries late
                  every night
     Turns off all the
                           lights
         Sits in bed
bawls
             her eyes out
      in the dark
Cutting out pieces
      of her heart
No one can see
                          the scars
           of her sewing
back up her chest
       Soon she will be
             an empty shell
        Hopefully
                    putting her soul to rest
If her heart
                    is no longer there
It can't get broken,
              right?
If no one can see
                          the tears
Then she never cried,
                     right?
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