At times
I long for a world that is black and white

Crimson sunsets would no longer make me believe that love is anything but painful

and the oceans would stop summoning for me to come home with their sapphire tides

I could be content with where I reside, for all colors would be the same
and your eyes would stop calling my name

and perhaps, it's because a world filled with grey

is merely and unapologetically mundane.

An endless supply of words held me together
Strung up in a line to keep stringing me along
Perhaps I'm fooling myself to believe the muddle of letters
Or it's just natural to want to not believe what you've known all the time

To think a few words could keep the flame flickering is amazing
That the smallest notion could move the ocean
Or that time could reverse a crack in the shell of a heart
Maybe one day the walls will stop building themselves to let something in
And the tide will finally flow again, bringing you with it.

I'm dying in vain,
I'm closing my eyes with pain.
all the thirsts and all the stuggles I gain
will still remain.

those fame I dreamed of,
those Game I played,
those struggles I take
I will leave them and forsake.

to thee I struggled so much,
thy roaring sounds still bothering me.
to thee I cried so hard,
my words at this pass were vain and bootless.

I love me, because I can depend on myself
I love my company, more than I love anyone else's
I love my space, more than anyone in it
I love to ride, more than riding besides someone
I love being with myself so there is no time-sharing
I often talk to myself because I am a good listener
You call me selfish? YES, I am happy being selfish!!

Why? Why on earth am I the way I am?

I'm terrified of sleeping alone
so please i beg you dont go