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 Aug 2015 lucy winters
eli
she always told me
"try This"
"try That"
she constantly
wore a blood alcohol level
that defied mathematics.
and bore eyes red
as a painter's canvas;
but a smile
she would paint onto her face
putting the final touches
to her masterpiece.

she always told me
Try This
Try That
reassuring i'll be fine regardless
if i get hooked, or not.

she was Perfectly Drifting away
unaware
i was already hooked
to the most powerful Drug of all
right
in front of me.
 Aug 2015 lucy winters
Anna
"You'd be really hot if you actually ******* shaved. Hairy girls are disgusting," you snarled.
"*******," was easier to say than
"I smell like vanilla. You smell like 3 day old body odor."
Its my body and I can do- or not do- whatever I please wish it. K bye.
"but i care about you."
he said ...

       after i heard through the

g r a p e v i n e

       that he'd shared our energy with another.
he had ****** himself within her & she moaned his name
... probably.
& while he's sleeping peacefully, here i am,
rolling in bed, going insane.

"but we have a good thing together."
he said...

       after i saw a text come through his phone,
       it read

i m h o r n y b a b e, w h e n u c o m i n g t o s e e m e ?
    
       right then & there i wished i was blind
& i felt the tears run down my face.
i just didn't understand, how love,
something that's supposedly so beautiful...
could cause me so much pain.

"but i love you."
he said...

        as he tugged on my arm, his eyes screaming

p l e a s e d o n ' t g o

         but his actions being the antithesis of that.
& that's when i realized, i'd given him the power
to constantly break me.
break me &

B R E A K me, until i believed i was nothing.

"but i care about you."
"but we have a good thing together."
"but i love you."
i doubt i'll ever believe those lies again.
The worst part
Isn't the pain
Though it hurts

The worst part
Isn't the sadness
Though that's horrible

No,
The worst part
Is the emptiness

That feeling
When you don't see the step
And you fall down

When you try to sit down
And someone's moved the chair

When you reach for support
Only to find it's abandoned you

That is the worst part
Of saying goodbye
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