Her poems paint a self-portrait
Of a face she hides from the world;
Secrets well-guarded, slowly revealed,
Each line a new chapter unfurled

Every word that drips from her pen
Is likened to paint on the knife;
From sunlit paths that lead to dark caves,
She paints the story of her life

Stroke after stroke the words are placed
Upon the warped canvas of time;
The torment that each lonely day brings
Urges her to dress it in rhyme

Are lonely days not punishment
Enough for this painter of verse?
Yet, night only grants her fitful sleep
As her woes refuse to disperse

O, painter of a thousand words,
Your cruel fate has taken its toll,
Leaving you to walk this Earth alone
With weary heart and sick of soul

With open eyes she lays dreaming
Of the day love will grace each dawn;
Little does she know her fate is sealed:
Long ago her portrait was drawn

Though he's gone, life goes on as before --
The rising sun still announces dawn;
At night the moon paces my bedroom floor,
But now my lonely heart cries out "Begone!"

Without him, seasons still come and go,
Callous Spring comes strewing her flowers;
I pay no heed to Nature's to and fro,
In despair is how my heart spends its hours

Since he left, the joys I knew have flown,
At once, like startled birds taking wing;
The last of the summer's roses have blown,
Not a trace remains of our fairy ring

When he left, he took my hopes and dreams,
Strange, he was so different from the rest;
Now my abandoned heart silently screams
While I stare at the sun like one possessed

O, yes, I know his love was not real!
Just a seed sown by a desperate hand,
Expecting to harvest my heart's ideal --
A castle of dreams built upon quicksand

Well, now there are no seeds left to sow,
But in failure I have found meaning:
Imagined love can never thrive and grow,
And grants harvests too sparse for the gleaning

If I were on the shore, looking out toward the sea,
And from a distance, you beckoned to me,
Could I not tread water to reach you in haste,
To be held in your arms, and your kisses to taste?

If I were a garden wall made of rock and stone
And you, a vine, forsaken and alone,
How could I not invite you to boldly climb
Until I was covered by your foliage sublime?

If I were sure that it's my love you were craving,
And from a cloud, to me you were waving,
The embers of passion's fire having been stirred,
Could I not fly directly to you like a bird?

If you were to tell me I alone owned your heart,
How incomplete you feel when we're apart,
Even after death, I shall not be forgot ....
Would I love you, too? My darling, how could I not!

My heart throbbed with Love's expectations
As he pressed his lips to my ear;
Passion's voice eagerly whispered
Forbidden words I longed to hear

Each kiss evoked thrills beyond measure ---
How they left me gasping for air;
But, O, when his face rested on mine
And his fingers tangled my hair!

So warm was his breath and his sighing,
Like the embers of passion's fire;
Then a gentle stroke of his hand
Ignited the flames of desire

I smiled as he struggled to tell me
What his eyes so clearly revealed;
But no words had to be spoken --
The fate of our love had been sealed

So close was the blissful surrender,
I could feel the beats of his heart;
So close to ecstasy  . . .  and then,
Suddenly, it all fell apart!

The warbling of a bird awoke me,
Then my eyes caught the sun's first beam;
So close had I come to Heaven . . .
But it was no more than a  dream

For what purpose has morning come again,
Did my cries awake the sleeping sun?
As dawn tolls its bell, the moon bids farewell,
And the sun's rays unfold, one by one

And still no response when I call to you,
Can your ears not hear my mournful hymn?
Now through tear-filled eyes I watch the sun rise,
And so begins the day, bleak and grim

How does Heaven justify such cruelty,
Taking from me what I most desire?
With a searing flame, Death's cruel arrow came
And pierced your heart, setting my world afire

Reluctantly, birds gather on branches,
Sadly, to sing their songs they decline;
While I cry for you, their cries are heard, too;
O sing, faithful friends, this pain is mine!

A lonely wind now surges through my world,
Missing you cuts my heart like a knife;
My heart's in tatters ..... nothing else matters,
It was your love that defined my life

Now shadows lengthen as the darkness falls,
And tomorrow's pain, well within view,
While I hold tight to your memory tonight,
I may smile ..... but then I'll cry for you

In a corner of my heart there dwells a pain
That thoughts of you awaken each day;
Purposely, I provoke it, then sigh in vain,
Knowing there will be a price to pay

In a corner of my heart there is a poem,
Born of each kiss and each solemn vow;
Loving you as I did they could fill a tome --
But poems your love inspired mock me now

What good is love if the happiness it brings
Turns into a pageantry of pain,
And the song of love the heart blissfully sings
Becomes parting's sorrowful refrain?

Without love, no comfort waits at end of day,
Just memories, unwilling to depart;
(Was it wrong to keep one flower from love's bouquet,
Hidden in a corner of my heart?)

In a corner of my heart my expressions
Of true and faithful love sit and cry;
Unable to absorb the transgressions
Your love brought, they're mute, without reply

So many tears have fallen, forging this chain
That won't permit memories  to depart;
And I can find no way to suppress the pain
Now filling each corner of my heart

Time outstretched its callous fingers
And reclaimed my summer bouquet,
While Death's apprentice stands close by,
Waiting for his cue in this play

The hour has grown late -  so be it -
What matters one more reckless choice?
Though eyes grow dim, yet my ears strain
To hear Love's long-awaited voice

My door now opens to strangers,
(I'm not concerned with their intent)
A daring stance now pays my way,
The coins of youth having been spent

And what of love, that elusive dream
That taunts my heart mercilessly?
This consoling thought I proffer:
Keep faith, dear heart, it yet may be!

And perhaps on some moonlit night,
With his arms clasped tightly 'round me
My love and I will speak with joy
Of that winter night he found me

Watching tender blossoms open,
Though a frost lay thick on the bower,
How we'll  bless that borrowed sunshine
Love granted in our winter hour!

But should this never come to pass,
Who is there to blame for my plight?
Just a fool in her loneliness
Who dared to dream on a winter night

Once again my thoughts walk love's graveyard,
(Why is there no lock on that gate?)
Never have I seen a field so charred
By ashes of love that turned to hate

These remains of love provoke and rile
Stifled sobs as I look around
In silence, not wanting to defile
Sacred memories of this hallowed ground

Pain and pity are shaking my frame
As the tears gather in my throat;
False hope, and then prayer (one and the same)
Rise from my lips to some realm remote

Once again the heart is left weary,
Weak grows the pulse coursing my veins,
Gazing through eyes clouded and teary,
One last time I search through love's remains

But I can find nothing worth saving
Of a love that died long ago;
So why this unrelenting craving,
Why does this stream of memories flow?

It's over, I must put it to rest!
The bloom's faded, the fragrance lost;
Love's phantom now an unwelcome guest -
Worthless as a crucifix uncrossed

As night spreads its ribbons of darkness
Loneliness taps at my window pane,
But too lost in reverie am I
To pay heed to its doleful refrain

Wishful thinking helps me to escape
From the madness of Life's fickle ways;
Though make-believe is a tangled web,
I thrive in its ethereal haze

How sweet the proverbial nectar
That flows from his lips onto mine;
What bliss I derive from a romance
Only my wild impulse could design

I swoon at his expressions of love
Sung and spoken in poetic verse;
(Though at times my heart scoffs at pretense,
Seeing not a  blessing, but a curse)

Yet, when I gaze deep into his eyes
I thrill to see love's reflection there;
He need only take hold of my hand
And together we climb Heaven's stair

O, how painful  are the loveless hours
Of reality I must endure;
In my dreary solitude I find
Wishful thinking holds a strange allure

Ah! but then reality holds sway ---
Once again the snake devours the dove;
But wishful thinking soon restores my peace
With its exquisite mimicry of love!

The moon stands vigil as the wine prepares
To perform its secret ministry;
Well rehearsed, the sacred nectar obeys,
Raising the floodgates of memory

Love's smoldering ashes start to ignite ---
One more sip, and then the flame's aglow;
Intoxicating specters flood the room --
O, what sorcery . . . let the wine flow!

Hands that deliver torment with each touch
Guide me slowly into heaven's arms;
Passion flares, and as our lips combine
I yield to the wine's spellbinding charms

So the hours pass in shameless ecstasy
In the darkened nooks of Memory's Hall;
But the wine is dwindling  . . . it's almost gone,
Soon reality's curtain must fall

And dawn arrives spewing its harsh advice:
Abandon this trickery of the wine!
But dusk will bear witness to my heart's plea:
Sweet libation, make this night divine!

And so this strange ritual has sustained me
Through many godforsaken Decembers;
But should Time erode flakes of memory,
I'll not worry . . . the wine remembers

Standing at the footbridge I waited each night,
My lantern raised high, with its brilliant light,
Until he safely passed, one side to the other,
Only to watch him fall into the arms of another

Now my lantern is cold, no flame burning bright,
No more do I search for those lost in the night;
Next to the hearth, on pillows strewn o'er the floor,
I sip sherry with the wanderer who knocked at my door

As night descends it brings foreboding,
And right on cue, here comes the fear;
What will I do when the clock strikes twelve --
When it's midnight, and he's not here

Night after night, the same scene unfolds,
Misery, why do you loiter near?
The starless ceiling of black and gray
Steadily falls, and he's not here

Not a thousand stars falling to Earth,
Nor the moon whispering in my ear
Could free me of the impending doom
Of the twelfth hour,  if he's not here

What agony! will God hear my prayer,
Or into my heart ****** a spear?
The hour hand of the clock slowly crawls ...
Nearing midnight .... but he's not here

But the fount of mercy doesn't flow,
My bitter cup, devoid of cheer;
As I draw the drapes, here comes the storm,
Midnight arrives, and he's not here

The clock's message echoes through the night,
Trying to provoke one more tear;
The steady ticking tells me that he's
Not here ..... not here ..... not here .....

Let me chance upon a secluded nook
Where Life's bitter torments seem to cease;
There I shall transcribe a most dismal book ---
My heart's voiceless pain seeking release;
A field of daisies swaying in good cheer
Might lighten this burden so sad and drear

Or  I might climb to the top of a hill
Where the scent of heather stirs the air,
And the clear mountain springs sputter and spill
Over ferns dwelling happily there;
A comforting balm shall course through my veins
As my heart dictates its mournful refrains

While tides ebb and flow o'er a restless sea,
My pen will scrawl with a feverish zest;
And when all endurance is drained from me,
On some grassy knoll I'll take my rest;
As the night unfolds its jeweled canopy
My heart will shed its cloak of agony

But should more toil await as night draws near,
Pity me not for this endless day;
For life has ****** many a poisoned spear,
And this poet's heart must have its say;
Not till the very last vestige of pain
Is expelled, will my heart find peace again

Nighttime grants imagination its wings
To soar far above the day's common things,
And as my lids gently veil weary eyes,
A voice in my head whispers lovely lies:

"Come, dear, make haste! This day's in retreat,
The hour of enchantment now lies at your feet;
Let your dreams run wild -- command what you will,
Sing passion's song!  .  .  .  though Love's own voice be still"

Whispered desires summon gentle hands
To caress and embrace, as love demands;
A warm breath turns into a searing kiss --
A seductive touch,  a moment of bliss

Each fantasy I conceive becomes real,
(These are the moments that Fate cannot steal;
Though flaunting its might, it has not the power
To slay these thoughts or vandalize this hour)

And so with golden threads of make-believe,
Romantic overtures are mine to weave;
Such love is mine till night opens the door
To the sun's first rays . . . . .  then love is no more

O, what wonders my senses behold  
As down the garden path I amble,  
And a welcoming feast starts to unfold
As my footsteps approach the bramble  

A few startled birds dare to scold me
As I pluck the berries from their stems;  
(It would take determined arms to hold me
And restrain me from these tasty gems)  

But as a child I was taught to share,  
So my feathered friends have naught to fear.
But what is that scent invading the air?
As I turn the path, lilies appear

Casablanca lilies six feet high
Tower over me like fragrant clouds;
Small wonder mourners approvingly sigh
When white lilies adorn dead men's shrouds

Scintillating songs of mirthful birds
Gently float toward the welcoming ear
Of the listener, who, at a loss for words,
Stands in awe of this enchanted sphere

Nature's beauty begs to be caressed
By admiring eye or sensual hand;
And those who seek will find a treasure chest
Of Earth's priceless gems at their command

As the sun pompously greets the night,
Spreading flames of gold and crimson hues,
All the senses stir in utter delight,
And in such splendor poets find their muse!

Standing at Love's window, I wonder
Why I've never been invited in;
I ponder the possibilities .....
Soon glorious fantasies begin

Is it true that roses smell sweeter
When Love gently caresses their stem?
I've heard that birds sing most splendidly
When Love is the purpose guiding them

And they say Love can revive a heart
That has withered like a dying flower;
O, the stories I've heard about Love ......
Its gentleness and its furious power

Even a heart that's grown weak and tired,
Fraught with ashes where once there was fire,
Even for that heart there's still a chance
To rekindle Love's blazing desire

But the years pass, and I've yet to know
If the things they say of Love are true:
That first union within Eden's gates!
The ecstasy angels never knew!

Yes, Love has quite the reputation
For bringing joy where sorrow has been;
But I wouldn't know - that's what I've heard,
I'm on the outside ...... looking in

It's time I set sail for an unknown shore,
I've rigged the mast the best that I could,
My destination's a mystery,
And I fear, perhaps more than I should

Blindly I've wandered, so what's left to fear ....
Another storm? I've weathered them all,
Love's tangled vines have tripped me before,
So it's of small concern if I fall

And should a wave cause my boat to capsize .....
More than once I've drowned in my own tears,
Then cruelly revived, against my will,
And so this is the least of my fears

I may encounter nights as black as coal,
Frosty winds that could turn flames to ice,
But should this come to pass, I'm prepared,
I'll recite his love poems, once or twice

And I'll stare at the sky's diamond necklace,
Recalling how we loved 'neath the stars,
O, when will I cease to yearn for love lost?
Old wounds hurt when you pick at the scars

I'm ready now to break the bonds of Earth,
Long enough on its thorns have I trod,
At journey's end, may I find my peace,
And forgiveness in the heart of God

It didn't seem quite so urgent then
To lay my Song of Love at his feet;
The buds of Spring were yet to open,
And the song of the robin was sweet

I kept my song safe inside my heart,
I'd give it voice at just the right time,
As enchanting as a full blown rose
Would be the melody and the rhyme

And I rehearsed, a line at a time,
All the while, Fate watched from the back room;
My Song of Love, soon it would be sung
When the lilac trees burst forth in bloom

The lilacs dried, summer changed her dress,
While the hills took on a crimson hue;
No one asked to hear my Song of Love,
And soon the frigid winter winds blew

Now, behind snow-crested mountains,
Summer's sun has begun to descend;
My song lies wrapped in a burial shroud --
A concept it cannot comprehend

My Song of Love still wants to be heard,
"Tomorrow" still vibrates on my tongue;
Alas! tomorrows have come and gone
And my Song of Love remains unsung

Shadows lengthen, day is almost done,
Laid to rest are dreams of tomorrow;
Flickering embers of a dying sun
Seem to mock my unrestrained sorrow

O, Life, how falsely you've dealt with me!
Starving for love, I feasted on lies;
When my head was bowed in agony,
You sent more woe, dressed in hope's disguise

With hands wrapped around an empty glass,
Waiting for someone to pour the wine,
Through tear-filled eyes I watched the years pass,
Each night praying that my star would shine

Enough! My eyes gave their share of tears,
(Though some higher force may disagree,
But I've moved beyond those threats and fears,
Dismissing that which I cannot see)

My feet will no longer tread this path
Formed of craggy rocks, nettles and thorns,
Designed by some Power, wielding its wrath
On beings it designed, and now scorns

My heart and I have suffered enough --
We long to lie 'neath some ancient tree
Where the woes of this world we'll rebuff,
Basking in a long-sought liberty

Every tear from my eyes has been drained,
My life, to the last, remains unblessed;
Has not enough suffering been ordained?
Enough!   I've earned my eternal rest!

A seed of Love that never found
The hallowed path to fertile ground,
The fruitless trees, the orchard bare ---
Bitter pain of unanswered prayer

A tired heart, trampled by Love's feet
Dolefully yields in utter defeat;
No eyes gaze upon its despair.
Although unseen, the pain is there

An outstretched hand that no one holds
As night's obsidian cloak unfolds;
Mournful sobs permeate the air---
O, what pain! And no one to share

Hours of blissful happiness
Followed by guile's fatal caress;
Wretched pain of Love's sad farewell . . .
O, what stories the past could tell!

Though such reminiscing brings regret,
Still, the heart whispers "Never forget,"
And so to Love's treachery we're resigned,
And journey on  . . .  with pain close behind

See those stars twinkling so high in the skies?
Some are sad stars trying to avert their eyes,
They've observed lovers who have parted ways,
To keep from crying, they must turn their gaze

And those stars displaying faint hues of red .....
Don't know if it's true, but I've heard it said
Love songs and poems tend to make them cry,
And cause these soulful stars to blush and sigh

Now each star's assigned a task to perform,
To create galaxies, many must swarm;
Stars must grant favors when they're wished upon,
Should they fail their tasks, their light soon grows wan

And such stars will be expelled from their berth,
The Lord God sends them careening toward Earth;
It's not clear what offense they've committed,
Perhaps they were lax, or just dimwitted

But how lucky is the star that hovers
And twinkles in the bright eyes of lovers!
Their satisfying task never grows old,
(With stars in our eyes, love never grows cold)

If love has found you, then you have been blessed.
If you're still searching, don't give up the quest;
And when love tears down despair's prison bars,
Don't forget to thank your lucky stars!

As twilight's deep shadows were falling,
A spirit voice whispered in my ear
A message that I found most enthralling,
Which I'll now repeat for all to hear:

"Love is a treasure we must cherish
Above all else, lest it soon be lost
Among baubles and gemstones most garish,
And fool's gold that was not worth the cost

Unlike diamonds, Love does not glisten,
Yet what radiance beams from tear-filled eyes
As desolate hearts eagerly listen
To Love's gentle whisperings and sighs

Love is a divine commodity ---
Inexplicable is its power,
As baffling as an ancient mystery,
Bringing joy to each waking hour

Cling tightly to this treasure called Love ---
Unequaled is the bliss that it brings,
For its value is rated well above
All the gaudy wealth of queens and kings

If bejeweled fingers fill your glove,
Cast aside these trifling, worthless themes;
Set your sights on the riches forged from Love . . .
You'll know wealth beyond your wildest dreams"

If I could hold your heart close to mine,
I would know what sorrows you bear,
And I would claim your pain as my own --
All that you'd allow me to share

If you could but let me hold your heart
Through the dark hours that plague your day,
I'd gently restore your trust in Love
That waves of deceit washed away

If I could keep your heart for one night,
So attached to love it would grow
That should you attempt to reclaim it,
It would shout a resounding "No!"

If I could lay your heart upon mine,
All your woes I'd seek to smother;
Maybe, just maybe, your pain and mine
Would annihilate each other

If I could hold your heart next to mine,
Dreams long dead would once more take flight;
Will we deny our hearts their last fling . . .
Or let them soar in wild delight!

Why can I not escape from Loneliness?
It hangs over me like a cloud;
Prowling about like a stray, hungry dog
It finds me cowering in the crowd

From dawn 'til dusk Loneliness calls my name,
With vague terrors it fills each night;
It accompanies every step I take
And no prayer seems to ease my plight

Loneliness etched its name upon my heart
And each day worships at my shrine;
Wretched fiend, your loyalty makes me cringe!
If only Love had your design!

Through long empty nights I curse Loneliness
As it leads me down its dark hall;
And yet, if it weren't for Loneliness
I'd have no companion at all

My pen hovers over a blank page
As red ink drips from my wounded heart;
The pain has been stirred by some senseless word,
Now my loneliness awakes with a start

Why are all my words penned in red ink?
The heart must deliver its lament!
Sad words find release, bringing a strange peace
When too long the heartaches of love are pent

And why do my verses taste of salt ---
Not of the sea and its gypsy waves
That come and go, free of all care and woe,
But from tears shed for the love my heart craves

How much must a heart invest in love
Before it receives a dividend?
To reach its goal, it pays a hefty toll,
And yet, the journey seems to have no end

So where lies the blessed love I seek?
Have I left some leaf or stone unturned?
Might there be a flower in my sunset hour
Yet to blossom, for which my heart has yearned?

Lord, take pity on my foolish dreams!
Shine your torchlight on my dark despair;
And when I implore, storming Heaven's door,
Turn the key and permit me entry there

For those of you who've had more than your share
Of Life's wrath, I raise my glass of false cheer!
Join me in a toast to Fate, if you dare
(But don 't appease it by shedding a tear)

Though Fate chose to look on us with disdain
Don't let its wicked pranks obscure your mind;
Each morning a new sun rises again --
Another chance to leave your woes behind

Always keep in mind Fate may smile on you
And on your shoulders lay its golden shroud;
But be prepared, should all this prove untrue
And the dawn offers yet another cloud

We who have nothing, not even Love's touch,
Crippled, we slowly limp toward the abyss,
Frantically seeking a lifeline to clutch,
All the while awaiting Death's frightful kiss

You who have never found favor with Fate
In this jungle of misery and rue,
It is your misfortune I celebrate,
For your failure has been my failing, too;
But rest assured, all suffering will abate
When in Death's embrace we bid Life adieu!

To the four winds I scattered all my dreams,
Hoping they'd ascend to Heaven's door;
But that was so long ago -- now it seems
Love was the one dream that failed to soar

When will he come, does he know of my plight?
Someone needs to warn him to beware
Of the darkness that is mine, day and night;
Will he search where no one else would dare?

How will he find me, when no friendly star
Offers to light the path to my door?
Might this task prove to be a bridge too far?
Such sobering thoughts shake me to the core

Will he falter when the path twists and turns,
Will he ford the rivers though they rise?
On the windowsill my last candle burns,
Will the flame attract his straining eyes?

Time grows short, and I've reason to despair:
Fate has a will mightier than my own;
As hope withdraws, I raise my hands in prayer --
The seeds of panic have been sown!

When I think of days and nights I have spent
Begging unresponsive deities,
I now wonder if that time should have been used
Savoring life's wine, instead of on my knees

So many prayers that rose like curling smoke
From a heap of dried smoldering leaves,
Rising upward, supplicating a response,
Were they lost in some galaxy thick with thieves?

I fear not one reached its destination --
Am I naive in my conclusion
That perhaps my prayers were feckless and garbled,
Or dismissed in a moment of confusion?

No! My prayers were delivered distinctly,
But to each one futile hope was pinned;
Too often these hands folded reverently,
While my supplications were lost to the wind

Now the rivulets are too cold to flow,
And the trees have donned their robes of ice;
No longer will these hands be joined together
Pointing upward, trying to reach Paradise

Such things are not accomplished by begging,
I turn my back and scoff at the rules
Of a game won only by the most cunning,
While faithfully observed by cowards and fools

I will not survey the devastation
Strewn in paths I've so faithfully trod,
Walking on thorns, wondering if I've suffered
Long enough to be found worthy by some god

Misery and woe have trespassed my heart,
So here's a vow I will not rescind:
These hands will now be used to reach out for love,
And not for prayers that will be lost to the wind!

The sweetest mystery of life --
This glorious madness called Love,
Formed and nurtured by the mind of God,
A rare gift born of Heaven above

Softly, its essence rides the wind,
Satisfying a primal need;
Love's rare scent causes delirium,
Yet we inhale it with anxious greed

Love provides the strength to surmount
Life's hurdles, to climb each mountain;
When the sands of longing parch our throats,
In our desert there springs a fountain

We hear Love's whisper in the dark,
Then one tender kiss kindles the flame;
Suddenly the fire's out of control --
The raging beast is no longer tame

Love is a baffling mystery,
Who can interpret the spell it weaves?
How great is the joy when it arrives,
But what burning torment when it leaves!

Only Love can inspire the poet
To relay what our hearts cannot tell:
Through Love we're shown a glimpse of Heaven,
Without Love, we get a taste of Hell

Love drinks our tears, changing them to wine,
In darkest hours, Love intercedes;
Love assaults the tree of loneliness,
Destroying the root, crushing the seeds

Love affords us the will to endure
Failure of our ill-conceived schemes;
Love is the calm that follows the storm,
Love is the fulfillment of our dreams

Love is the proof we are still alive,
For no spirit could feel Love's fire;
Though we declare Love with our last breath,
The grave silences mortal desire

What force gives meaning to our lives,
Our mettle when push comes to shove?
What helps us endure life's cruelest pain?
This divine blessing that we call Love!

The fountain's gone dry, now withered leaves blow
Down the path where we walked side by side;
Faint echoes still murmur in the wind:
"God is Love" ..... but O, how they lied!

Two loving hearts always beating as one,
If separated, would bring great pain;
And heaven cried "Lord, if you take him,
Such love she'll never find again!"

"And who will cherish her as he has done?
Love this faithful is so hard to find";
And heaven cried "Lord, please reconsider
This notion that's clouding your mind!"

But, sadly two hearts were torn asunder,
And heaven cried "Lord, what have you done?
You've torn apart the most loving hearts
That ever beat under Earth's sun!"

But Divine will is not to be challenged
Or questioned, though caring angels tried;
And with heavy hearts, they bowed and said:
"Thy will be done" ..... and heaven cried

Soon I'll set sail for an unknown shore,
So I've rigged the mast as best I could,
My destination's a mystery . . .
And I fear -- maybe more than I should

If turbulent waves capsize my boat
That would be the least of my fears,
For I've survived the vagaries of Love --
More than once I've drowned in my own tears

At times I've tripped on Love's tangled vines,  
So I'm not concerned I might fall;
Life's storms battered me relentlessly,
But I stood fast and weathered them all

Death may inflict nights as black as coal,
Freezing winds that could turn flames to ice;
But Life's fickle ways have tempered me
For just such reckless rolls of the dice

But who's to say what perils may lurk
In the darkness of Death's corridor;
Will peace prevail, or some unknown dread
When my eyes close and I breathe no more?

Knowing I must break my bond with Earth,
Just the notion shakes me to the core . . .
Taken from this world against my will,
Exiled from my home  . . . forevermore!

How mindlessly on Life's ocean we float,
Practicing deceit, causing tears to fall,
While a witness silently takes note --
Time sees and hears all

Not one false vow made in the name of Love
Will escape Time's ever watchful eyes;
Like thawing snow reveals the frozen dove,
Time unveils all lies

Tears carve channels that are easy to trace,
Brows are furrowed by promises broken;
You need only look upon my face .......
The years have spoken

Alone ..... what a heart-wrenching word,  
Hope recoils in the face of Despair;  
The purpose of Life becomes blurred,  
A promise broken beyond repair  
  
Alone ..... riding the restless waves  
Of loneliness on this stormy sea;  
O, to send my woes to their graves  
And revel in Love's sweet company!

Alone ..... too much time to wonder
When light and dark converged into one;
Helplessly I watched Fate plunder
All I held most dear under the sun

Alone ..... I knocked at Heaven's door,
But to my anguish no ear paid heed;
Yet, in dark hours I still implore
Heaven to commute what Fate decreed

Alone ..... now facing Life's twilight,
Straight to my heart panic flings its spears;
What once was deemed a sorry plight,
Has become the sum of all my fears

I see you had nothing better to do
And decided to come for the tour,
Then please, do come in, and you will see
Just how much pain one heart can endure

Before we begin, I just want to say
For our tears, we must never feel shame;
Rather, let envy flare up toward those
Whose hearts were never burned by Love's flame!

Throughout the years, I've had to add more rooms
As my collection of sad tears grew;
This dark room holds Tears of Loneliness ---
They have stained the walls a somber hue

As you can see, the labels are varied:
Tears When He Left, Tears of Missing Him,
Tears From Nights I Prayed He Would Return,
Tears When I Remember  Kissing Him

And here in this back room are all the tears
That were cried with intense, searing pain
When I found the courage to admit
He would not be coming back again

In this little room are assorted tears ---
Tears of Forgiveness, Tears of Regret;
Strange!  Among my tears I've yet to find
One that ever helped me to forget

And in this room are the Tears of Pity
Friends have donated over the years;
Sometimes I come here, seeking comfort,
But friends have moved on - now no one hears

I seem to have misplaced my Tears of Joy,
A box so small, I tend to lose it;
But I don't care, it just collects dust,
Seldom, if ever, do I use it

And with this concludes our tour for today.
When you've nothing to do, please feel free
To come again, perhaps with a friend ........
New tears are added regularly

God knows the ocean needs the waiting shore
To welcome the tides as they flow;
God knows the birds need their wings to soar,
Is He not aware that I need you so?

God knows warmth must follow Winter's harsh reign,
On Spring, nature's sweet song depends;
God knows sunlight must echo the strain,
So I need the warmth and light your love lends

God knows when each star tumbles from its berth,
Or when a leaf falls from a tree;
God knows our miseries suffer no dearth,
So why is it you are not here with me?

God knows laws of nature must be obeyed,
First comes the bud, then the flower;
God knows, for I've told Him as I prayed,
I need your love to guide me through each hour

God knows I'm determined to stay this course,
No one will I place above you;
God knows that my heart has pledged to yours
An eternal commitment to love you

God knows without air and water we'd die,
God knows each heart must have its due,
God knows without love life goes awry .....
But does He know I can't live without you!

Why does the abandoned heart keep loving,
Though there is no love being returned?
Because it was taught love is forever,
And love's lessons cannot be unlearned

Why does the abandoned heart keep beating,
Sustained only by a memory?
Because it must believe love will return,
And will wait forever, if need be

Why does the abandoned heart still insist
None but this love will ever suffice?
Because only this love carries the key
That unlocks the gate to paradise

I sense the raging fury of a storm  
That's unfolding as dark clouds gather;  
Hold me close,  and talk to me of love,    
Or sing me a song, if you'd rather  

Just as the bee hums his serenade
To the rose that waits in solitude,
Hover over me, and sing your song,
Talk to me of love ..... I'm in the mood  

Talk to me of love, have you not seen
Angels straining when you whisper low?
Though divine, they cannot comprehend
How my roses blossom in the snow

Through torrential rains my sun still shines,
Rainbows stretch across my midnight sky;
Love's gifts dismiss time and circumstance,
Baffled Angels don't know how or why

How can words of love possess such power?
If true love is what the heart dictates,
Then the words that flow are absolute --
Just watch as they trample Heaven's gates

And together, boldly we enter
To join the blest throngs that dwell above;
It is on such nights that I rejoice --
When you whisper your sweet words of love!

Wait no longer, talk to me of love,
Profound feelings come to torture me:
Abandonment, loneliness, then tears --
A foreboding of calamity

And here it is ......  the warble of a bird --
Now my eyes perceive the dawn's first beam;
I don't want to hear what's coming next .....
"Wake up, Lora, this was but a dream!"

Rays of a golden sun greet the day,
A warm breeze brushes my cheek in its play,
Fragrant flowers bloom in radiant hue,
Amidst this beauty, I think of you

A wandering bird in hectic flight
Searches for shelter before fall of night,
Then sanctuary comes within view,
When I've lost my way, I think of you

Amorous waves hug a lonely shore,
While avocets scavenge the sandy floor
The moon and stars keep their rendezvous;
In this peaceful realm, I think of you

A dove woos his mate high in a tree,
Together they warble love's symphony
As bees sip the rose's velvet dew;
Seeing love fulfilled, I think of you

Though life may demand its daily toll,
Your love guides me toward my journey's goal;
And when despair spreads its darkest hue,
Love's flame kindles when I think of you

A woman's forgiveness, desperately sought
By a man whose rash decision proved unwise;
But mercy's denied - there'll be no second chance.
What a sad account of love's demise!

So goes the tale of two shadows on the wall
That come to life as day draws to a close:
A remorseful man offers a woman
His atonement with a tear-stained rose

She extends her hand, but then withdraws . . .
What he reveals breaks her heart in two;
The man she loves has betrayed her trust,
He's confessed to having been untrue

Uncontrolled tears cascade down her face,
Her hands helplessly fall to her side;
His outstretched arms beg her forgiveness,
But she recoils . . . O, **** her foolish pride!

Discourse ensues amidst sobbing and tears,
Raising her arm, she gestures toward the door;
With lowered  head he reluctantly leaves,
And the tainted rose falls to the floor

There's a lesson to be learned from this tale:
At some point we're all brought to our knees,
Seeking pardon for senseless things we've done
Because of our innate frailties

So offer forgiveness when loved ones repent,
Forgive friends their insensitive rants;
And don't hesitate to forgive yourself . . .
Everyone deserves a second chance!

Once again I'm sailing alone at dusk,
No companion to help rig the mast;
So much pain accrued in my solitude,
The lonely hour approaches fast

Gathering clouds conceal the moon's bright glow,
Now I know all too well what this means,
The dark shadows fall, then I hear the call ......
The Court of Loneliness convenes

I see the stars lighting the firmament,
Yet, where I dwell, all is bleak and dour;
With my heartstrings torn, and my life forlorn,
No beacon lights my lonely hour

Was ever a chain of woe forged so strong .....
How did loneliness acquire such power?
The clock chimes, but how strange - time does not change,
Once again it's the lonely hour

I'm lost in a forest of broken dreams,
Searching for Love's enchanted bower;
Then, in the distance, with dark persistence,
A bell tolls the lonely hour

Is there no escape, no place I can hide!
Why do bells toll from every tower?
How can I forget what comes at sunset ......
The torment of the lonely hour!

On nights like this, my heart panics,
Life's meaning loses clarity;
And why is the moon so radiant?
I've no need of its charity

On nights like this, all seems hopeless;
If the sun could wake from its sleep,
Its warmth and light could not dispel
This cold darkness that runs so deep

On nights like this, sleep goes astray,
And Paradise comes within view,
Ah! But cruel angels guard the gate,
Refusing to let Love pass through

On nights like this, being denied
The pleasures that make life divine,
I dream of the forbidden fruit
And pretend it may yet be mine

On nights like this, prayers gently fall
From my lips, then bitter tears start;
But no comfort comes -- peace eludes
My distraught, long-suffering heart

What good is night without the thrill
Of a tender, passionate kiss,
Without the warmth of Love's embrace?
O, the torment of nights like this!

Just as the bee hums his serenade
To the rose blushing with wild delight,
Let soft murmurings flow from your lips --
Speak to me of Love . . . come thrill my night

Every spoken word becomes a flower
(Even Angels smile when you speak low;
Though divine, they cannot comprehend
How my garden blooms in winter's snow)

Love can transform time and circumstance,
Foster hope when mercy's spring runs dry;
Midst torrential rains the sun still shines,
Rainbows stretch across the midnight sky

Yet, when anguish takes aim at my heart,
Piercing it with grim accuracy,
How your words bestow Love's healing balm
Still remains a mystery to me!

How can words of Love possess such power?
When true love resides in the heart's core,
Then the words that flow are absolute,
And this pain-filled world exists no more

Carry me to that enchanted realm
Where we'll join the blessed throngs above;
I have no doubt that Heaven exists
When you whisper your sweet words of Love

Do you remember when we danced on clouds,
And when pelted with the dust of Mars,
We sought shelter in the Milky Way,
Where you wove me a garland of stars?

Do you remember when we hugged the moon
And its rays of light spilled from our eyes?
We woke curious angels from their sleep,
Watching their shadowy forms arise

Do you remember how you held my hand
When life delivered its harshest blows?
You showed me how to avoid the thorns
While reaching for the loveliest rose

As we floated on rivulets of dreams,
We broke all bonds tying us to Earth;
Finding comfort in each other's arms,
Days of sorrow became days of mirth

Do you remember the day your love died?
You dimmed the light, then dampened the flame;
Fantasies and dreams were laid to rest
In a tear-stained shroud bearing your name

Do you remember how much I loved you?
Now passion's fire is just an ember;
I know the flame can not be relit,
But I wonder ..... do you remember?

The sunset hour darkens my door,
A shadow moves across the floor;
There he stands in luminous air .....
The answer to my daily prayer

My trembling hands follow his form,
The cold night air turns, oh, so warm;
I taste his kiss scorching the air,
My fingers stroke his tangled hair

Just particles and flecks of dust!
I despair and turn in disgust;
He pulls me back and holds me tight,
My spirit love, my errant knight

Sensual feelings are unending,
O, what torment this pretending!
When from reality I flee,
It's then his spirit comes to me

How I love him ..... how I need him!
Lord, don't let this beacon grow dim!
But his love is not mine to own,
And soon the night finds me alone

Prayers can't change the rules of this game:
Here comes Fate to blow out the flame;
A foolish dream, a wish in vain .....
Companion from another plane

Face of moonlight, kiss born of dreams,
Love's longing taken to extremes;
Existing in some realm above,
He's all I have ..... my spirit love

Knowing that Life rides a stormy sea
And cloudbursts oftentimes overwhelm,
I'll rig the sails and face what may be . . .
If Love is standing guard at the helm

Fearlessly I'll walk Life's thorny path
In the dark of night or sunless day;
I'll grapple with Fate's relentless wrath . . .
If Love 's blessed radiance guides my way

And when despair grabs hold of my hand,
Gallantly I'll cry my share of tears
While waiting for storm clouds to disband . . .
If Love's at my side to calm my fears

When all seems lost and hope goes astray,
And my dreams lie withering on the vine,
I'll endure and rise above the fray . . .
If Love's hand is clinging fast to mine

When my spirit flees this mortal frame
And is summoned toward the dark unknown,
I'll fare well enough with memory's flame    . . .
If Love lingers when all else has flown

Life chewed up my dreams, and then spit them out,
My passions quelled, overcome by doubt,
Trust and courage vanished from my world;
Now I walk with arms outstretched to the sky,
Not in prayer . . . Fate's prisoner am I,
See? my flag of surrender's unfurled!

The fight is over, it's not worth the pain,
A futile clash, and what did I gain?
A defeat greeted with taunting jeers;
And Life still goes on -- seasons come and go,
The rivers freeze, then the rivers flow,
Life's cruel pranks just aren't worth the tears

But tears are the toll that Life demands,
Tears and the labors of calloused hands;
So let me say a word to the wise:
Don't waste your time reciting fruitless prayers,
Though you may evade Life's quicksand and snares,
God has closed the gates to Paradise!

As I descend the crumbling steps of Time,
I wonder what lies beyond the twelfth chime,
Are there any prizes left to win?
With my last breath shall I beg God's pardon?
Might he then bid me enter His Garden,
Or, like a bug, spike me with a pin?

No! I won't spend remaining days in fear,
I won't beseech a God that can't hear,
No longer on Defeat will I dwell;
I'll keep building my castles in the air,
Savoring fragments of love here and there,
As for Defeat ..... it can go to hell!

I observe the world through tear-filled eyes
As deceitful bounders don their disguise,
Pretending to care for the down-trodden,
Their pledge of compassion soon forgotten

But I cannot help but answer the cry
Of the hopeless whose lives have gone awry,
Marooned on Life's sea, left with but one oar,
Why am I compelled to pull them ashore?

It pains me to hurt any living thing --
Rather than **** a bee, I'd let it sting;
In my heart I know this is who I am ---
A willing martyr, a sacrificial lamb

Can this be choice? The instinct is so strong,
This astute awareness of right and wrong;
Perhaps in my reasoning I'm blundering,
But such principles leave me wondering:

Kids who tear wings off of butterflies ----
Is this a behavior they can revise?
Is this really free will, or do you suppose
Just inherent traits that we can't oppose?

I can't help but think choice is preordained,
At birth some dark souls with evil are stained,
While others carry their cross up the hill.
Do we really choose . . .  do we have free will?

Don't idly sing love songs to the wind ---
A troubled heart might be lurking near;
What a loathsome task to have to rescind
Loving words it was not meant to hear

Tread with caution, lest you wake the beast
That's held captive in some desperate heart;
When from its ******* Hope has been released,
It becomes fair game for Cupid's dart

Crumbs of Love that are carelessly tossed
Might be hungrily devoured in haste;
Once that bridge to Paradise has been crossed,
O, what pain when steps must be retraced!

Use due caution before you declare
Unwavering love to a distraught heart;
Deceitful words, though delivered with flair,
Carry the sting of a poisoned dart

Words of love are messengers of Hope
That allow earthbound hearts to take flight;
But lies and deceit weave the fatal rope
That binds lonely hearts to their sad plight

Ice still gathers upon the window panes.
Though I keep the hearth ablaze, I fear
In this desolate corner of my world
Spring will be a little late this year

A fear of dread and emptiness prevails
Since the light and warmth of love withdrew,
How will I endure  . . . How can I forget
All the joys of Spring that I once knew?

Now trees raise leafless arms toward the sky,
Shivering without their sleeves of green;
Bewildered birds gaze upon vacant nests,
Sadly pondering the dismal scene

And the flowers . . . what could convince them
To awaken to this hollow gloom?
To what avail would be their blossoming
And the essence of their sweet perfume?

And though I smile, my eyes betray the pain
That stabs at the heart when love is lost;
The sun has battened down its golden doors,
Leaving Hope to tremble in the frost

I'll not see the flowers bloom and go to seed,
Nor hear the nightingale's plaintive call;
And I know, as sure as day turns to night,
Spring will be late . . . if it comes at all

The threads of love are on the loom --
I'll weave a dream for you;
All the pain that swells your heart
Will soon be out of view

Drift away on the gentle waves
Of Fantasy's deep stream;
I'll stay close by, guiding you
Through this enchanted dream

Our two hearts, chained to loneliness,
Offered a fervent prayer,
Unaware our utterance
Stirred and startled the air

Now our love shines bright as the sun,
Although the world be dark;
Meagre are the moon and stars,
Life itself, but a spark

Though confined to  love's gilded cage,
We've no cause for despair;
Our hearts soar on wings of joy,
For Heaven heard our prayer

Two hearts sing in an unknown tongue,
(Love's language has no name)
While the blessed words pour forth,
Our love kindles the flame

Every night, I weave the same dream ....
What could be more divine
Than love's first embrace and kiss,
When your hand first held mine?

Dearest love, as this dream unfolds,
Cherish the things you see;
They're held captive  by  the  night .....
But dawn will set them free!