I give myself all the pain
thinking I deserve it
I'm not sure why I do that
but that's just how I am

There are two types of love


There's the kindd you find
In good morning texts and shy smiles
The kind that comes with
Butterflies and stolen glances
The kind
Where you laugh for no reason
And a smile is forever glued to your face
Sweet, simple, honest, pure.


And then there's


The kind that finds you
In 2 am phone calls
And the tears on your pillow
The kind that come with
A war between your brain and heart
The kind where
Nothing makes you happier
And nothing makes you sadder
Passionate, overwhelming, intense, daring
And when it all comes crashing down
So
Do
You.

one day my mind will start to fade,
one day my skin will start to decay.
one day I will only wake up with tears,
one day I will question why I was denied with fear.
one day I will be unable to move.
one day my bones will break like frail shoes.
one day I will cry to a god that I don't believe exist.
one day I will become too weak to kiss.
one day I will die slowly as I breathe.
one day I will come crashing to my knees.
one day holidays will mean nothing at all.
one day I will sit as my health begins to fall.
one day I will look back at all the wrong I've done.
one day the sky will **** me with the sun.
one day I will try to remember who I am.
one day I will no longer give a ****.
But today is today why throw it to the wolves?
life is too short to be appart when we have so much to lose.
And today I know that I will always know your face.
that warm comforting smile.
even the crazier days.
But after all is said and my body is all used.
I will remember that forever, that I'm madly in love with you...

I had the best of times
I will never forget
You were the best
But
Wait
Wait
Wait

I forgot

You can't escape me
I will be a lasting memory
that will linger in your mind and soul and body

You can't escape me
I will forever be in your nightmares
I will watch you as you sleep

You can't escape me
I am the horrific past that you'd wish to forget
But you can't escape me, you just can't

Eighty years
to love,
Twenty-nine thousand, two hundred days
to leap,
Seven hundred thousand, eight hundred hours
to learn,
Forty-two million, forty-eight thousand minutes
to laugh,
Two billion, five hundred and twenty-two million, eight hundred and eighty thousand seconds
to live,
One lifetime
to leave…

My parents warned me about the drugs in the street
What they didn't tell me though,
was about the other kind of drugs
The ones that come stumbling into your life
Hazel eyes and a heartbeat
That make yours almost
stronger
faster
Forcing you to realize
why they name hurricanes after people

if your heart is hurting
give it to me
and i will carry it
with hands of love
and tenderness
until it is no longer sore

if your soul is lost
then let me find it
i will illuminate it
with my love
and the courage i have
to unceasingly give it

if your feet are tired
from running
rest here with me
and i will soothe you
with my love
and gentle kisses

if your mind is gone
from thinking
then let me fill it
with warm thoughts
and poetry
about the effects
of your ever-changing beauty

i will reach into the darkness
and pull you out
i'll make a home in your heart
and chase your demons out
i will sing you love songs
louder then the voices in your head
and you'll forget what it feels like
to wish you were dead

Angry words and vengeful tones
dripped like poison
from our lips.

We were both to blame.

But you said you're just human,
so it's okay.
What about me?

Aren't I human too?

You said it was all my fault,
but then you said
you loved me.

I don't understand.

Your words are salt in my wounds,
so I'll just say
I'm sorry.

But are you sorry?