Just found out
Dear friend is gone
R.I.p angel
This is yo song

I keep trying to write letters
but they never turn out right

you taught me that home was never truly a place

it is blue eyes that I could get lost in for hours
pushing and pulling like the tides of the sea

it is strong hands that built things up but also
tore them down
and still managed to leave goosebumps down my spine

it is whispered 'I love you's that sound like a rainy august night
hushing me to sleep

it is long cold winter nights wrapped in your arms
listening to our heartbeats synchronized

it is the thought of our apartment

it is the holidays we spent together

it is the way you used to look at me

it is the promises we meant to keep

I am still in love with you. You are still my home. This hurts a lot less then I expected, but the pain is
constant and shoots down my veins. I am addicted to you. I feel alive with you.

I told you from the first time we kissed by the library that we would end up this way.

every second I was with you, I knew I would end up trying to write you heartbroken letters that would
never end up sounding right.

You tell me to grow up
To stop being a child

That I am being weak
I don't actually hurt that bad

Well news flash:
I am a child
And I do hurt that bad

"...There are miracles in the way their eyes linger, wishes in hands that are kept folded to still the trembling.

There is wonder in knowing that, someday, they will never have to let go, ever again.

This is what I fight for, this is what I've waited for, this is what gives me hope for the future.

This is what's meant to be.


...But late at night, when the bed that waits for me is empty, I fold wishes in my hands, and shed tears for what cannot be."

A distant girl who lives a lie,
Only to come alive as she
bleeds her stories upon
torn pages, hoping you'd
read her cries

She made friends with her words, but over time people turned their backs. Drowning as she pushed them away,
It seemed with every goodbye lowered a rope..

A distant girl who lives a lie,
Only to come alive as she
bleeds her stories upon
torn pages, hoping you'd
read her cries.
lives out her dreams in
peace

She made friends with her words.
She never knew the day she
whispered her last goodbye.
As her feet hung above the floor

I once met love and asked her.."why do you keep running away from me?"
She said..."Coz i fear that you will self-destruct if you come in contact with me."
Then i met life and asked him..."what's your deal?"
He replied..."My deal is pretty simple...i 'll push you to the edge of sanity and test the limits of your patience."

I'm losing my edge
Losing my sanity
Lost and confused
Seem to be drowning in a sea of self-doubts
Nothing seems to make sense no more
My conscience it seems has become corrupted
Every human relation that i've ever been a part of is cracking wide open
My head feels like it will explode any moment now
Every day i'm fighting this constant inner battle
And gradually the battle is reaching its peak
Darkness is consuming me
And i don't really have much of a defence
I'm exposed now
Transparent as water
They said time is the best healer
As of now time doesn't seem to be playing that part
F*... everything's going haywire
For the first time in my life i feel like a virtually hopeless person
And yet a tiny voice inside me head keeps telling me all the time....
....Don't lose hope
....Keep going...it's never over till it's over

Blue was the colour of your eyes
At times i wondered if u were an angel in disguise
Red was the colour of war
I wondered if i could ever survive
The situation was hopeless....but it was your image that carried me on
Provided me with that extra drive
U taught me to be fearless....to never give up a valid fight
U provided me with a sense of direction...a sense of wrong and right
U sacrificed and cared
I feel sorry that i couldn't give u all the wonderful things u deserved
U remember those days.....the days when we were young and naive...
.....having fearless dreams ....trying to make our own place in this crazy and selfish world....
....Talking about silly things and not caring about a thing in the world
Well.....seasons have changed
The months have rolled on
Years have gone by
The war is over but the fight still lingers on
The place that we once used to call to call home....is now nothing more than an abandoned wreckage....
.....and a beautiful memory that has long faded away into a black hole
The place used to be full of greens
We lived there right from our childhood to our teens
The neighbourhood was a lively one
The place used to bustle with life
Now it's nothing more than desolated buildings waiting patiently for their death
But u and me
We're still the same
Fruits of the same tree
We blossomed into beautiful flowers and had our 'sunshine' moments
We fought against odds and took a chance
Every moonlight used to witness our slow sensual dance
We cherished the sunny days
Enjoyed the rains
Fought the harsh winters
And welcomed spring with an open heart
My soul's an old one.....Bruised and battered....
......But not broken
I've seen the many facets of life....
.....The good,the bad and the ugly
I've had my share of success and failure
I've had my moments of glory
I've had my moments of shame
Had moments worth cherishing
Had moments of utter gloom
U were there with me in the prime of my life...through every thick and thin
And then u left me to survive the winter of my life in isolation....
....Life has never been the same and i can never be quite myself again
Honestly life ***** without u
I miss u everyday,every hour,every minute....every **** second
You know what u mean to me
My life has no purpose without u
Just come back to bed baby....i'm afraid to take this journey alone
Can't bear this six degrees of separation from u...Just can't.

On the outside back in,
Reflections of life,
Everything I am,
Affect me and morph me.

Help me kaleidoscope,
evolve me to change.
A small piece of god in the lights and the sounds.

In this acoustic ambiance,
Envelope me whole.
From my head to my hands to my heart to my soul.

My eyes are educated.
My body abused.
Yet perfectly painted to join all the used.

Were free in our worlds.
Realities vivid,
deep oceans of everything making me feel it.

Boulders of color and sound
Magical lights made of marmalade ground.
I have intended
To morph you the ended
Is only the start of my mouth.

Stars flow with every baton
Painting my eyes with excitement I'm on
Blues and the greens make
the world look serene
Have a second to take in the dawn.