My father once told me,
To grow out my hair,
Then I'd be pretty like my mother,
And he would actually care.

He would blackmail me,
Put me down for my looks,
Said I had no friends,
But good that I read books.

He said these hurtful things,
Such a while ago,
But I remember them today,
The words never really go.

They stick with me,
Like I stuck with my long hair,
But I cut it, and tomorrow,
I hope he won't care.

It's true, I'm scared,
For what my father might say,
But at least, I know,
I'm safe for another day.

you know i still love you
but i will always hate you too
for so many reasons
leaving me alone at 6 on friday nights till 2am the next day
i never ate enough
you never noticed
i never did my homework and lied saying i did
you hardly checked
i hurt myself
you never noticed
but your my dad, i can't just only hate you
but i feel the need to
cause the pain you put me in
i will never forget
the phone calls that i have to initiate with a text
im sorry im a bad child
im so sorry im ****** up
and im sorry you don't know how to parent
im sorry i love my mom more than i'll ever love you
thanks for not being there for me now
or ever
you have gotten worse as the years went by
but i love you dad
you know i do
you just don't know how much i hate you
thanks for kinda raising me
you yelled
i cried
you drank
i cut
you left
i attempted suicide
you slept
i drank
you went out
i stayed up till you got home
im sorry but i feel the need to say goodbye
to the father i wished you were
so i finally accept the real father you are

This is for you:

-the girl who is so ashamed because of her acne,
-the girl who cries in front of her mirror because she doesn’t
look like Picasso’s muse,
-the girl who forgot how to smile because of her problems,
-the girl who cries her eyes out every night because of him,
-the girl who is so terrified to attach because of her past relationship,
-the girl who is different from the others,
-the girl who wants to save every soul she meets, except hers,
-the girl whose heart, blood and soul runs wild,

-you are so much more than the sprinkles from your skin.
-you're not Picasso’s muse, but you definitely are God’s muse.
-don’t waste your life being so stressed, just enjoy the journey.
-you need to be strong.Cry your heart out, but stop,your tears are too worthy , make them rare, for the real ones.
-try to love yourself first, then someone else.
-your future is not defined by your past.
-you need to save yourself first.
-run with them, darling, and never look back.

This is for you, girls.
You, no matter what, are good enough.
You are lovable.
You are strong.
You are independent.
You are different.
You are rare.
You are you, and that is your power, learn how to use it.

Nevermind,
It's never mine,
What I've never done;
Never left behind,
I'd never thought,
I'd never find...

Broken,
Shaken,
Never had a thought;
Never crossed my mind,
Never thought I'd know,
Never thought I'd mind...

Shotgun,
Rusted,
Never thought twice,
Filled my veins with ice,
I've never lied,
I've Never died...

But never's fine,
I've never twice,
Played a game of never mind with my life,
I'll never find,

I'm never fine...