Laying quietly;
Humming harmoniously
In time with the rain.

hot breath
on necks
finger tips
digging into
hips
eyes at my waist
side
skin shivering
tongue
incantations
slipping under your spell

I am not a gambler
or a mystic or any sort of
self-righteous prophet
but there are sometimes
these small things
that glimmer with certainty.

Small things that pinpoint
the ****** of everything
in the deep, vast universe
converging on this
slim chance.

Its the sensation that
the words are there
on the tip of my tongue,
dangerously close
to slipping out into space
where you might hear them
and love me,
love me too.

Tender scalps
swollen lips
numb fingers
and bruised hips
tooth and claw
tear tender flesh
tears fall
the pain fresh
fingers clasped
sobs and gasps
...breathe
           I can’t
a sigh heaved
incant soft whispers
mantras in darkness
Chaos, my lover.

Fall in love with a writer
they say and you will never die (quoted)

Fall in love with a writer
they say and you will find yourself
embodied in words

Fall in love with a writer
they say and you will find yourself
stretched over lines and pages

Now,

What if a writer falls in love with you?
What happens is that their untamed mind
becomes an asylum where
words smash themselves
on the walls of their brains
summoning
their hands just
to let them out

What if a writer falls in love with you?
What happens is that their addiction
to falling in love is amplified
and when they love
OH THEY LOVE,
they get a certain high
that numbs their inhibitions to reality
and shuns logic to a very far away land

they  reach a mental state
that lifts you to high enough
just to see a glimpse of their world
just to taste a drop of their
potion
but not all of it

What if a writer falls in love with you?
What happens is that their eye *****
birth and harness flames that burn the coldest
of hearts and warm the strongest
of selves

What if a writer falls in love with you?
What happens is that their mind soaks up
every bit, every breath
every call, every cell
every touch, every talk
just to embroider it
in the quilt of thought
that's weaving endless stories about you
in their mind

What if a writer falls in love with you?
God have mercy on their soul
for their craving becomes dangerously
intensified, wrapping itself
to their muses,
giving them the sole purpose
of existing

For the more they love
the more stories they write
and more they feel
the longer
they
live

Colors, beauty, and hope.
Wonder, love, and light.
Life, songs, and joy.
These are all things
You will find in
My Terribly Beautiful Mind.
The most intricate stories,
Wonderful songs,
The happiest memories.
All these things you will find
In My Terribly Beautiful Mind.

However.
There is a darker side.

Loneliness, death, and pain.
Hatred, insecurities, and sorrow.
Darkness, shame, and harm.
These are all things
You will find in
The Beautifully Terrible Thoughts.
The most descriptive methods of suicide,
Horrible pain,
The saddest of cries.
All these things you will find
In the Beautifully Terrible Thoughts
That are a part of me.