can i give thanks
any impossible way
for wholly grace?

You, whose soul
beats in every heart
in every poem

futile words flail
their feeble reach
to grasp your beauty

a simple man
whose simple thought
cannot encompass Your All;

i am alive
because Spirit of Life
breathes within me

may that simple life
be fully spent
exalting Your glory.

The shade hides your eyes.
I really can't see the full extent of your bewitching gaze.
But you wait there.
Out of the sun.
In the shade cast by a lonesome tree in this vast city.
I suppose that would be the easiest landmark to find among this forest of concrete and steel.
I wait and observe your patience for such an awaited appointment.
All day you wait.  
Never looking left or right.
Never looking behind you or above.  
As the sun sets and the night takes its first breath,  you decide to take your first step out of the shade and into the night.
So I follow you.

Start slow...
     warming... up...and...below
         forty five degrees
            to the left...right...others go nineties...
       some freeze...from locked knees
   they don't mind...they'll recover
          before the hour is over...

Detach self
    from what
       surrounds
             but...still aware
                connected...
            agitation
        soon to be lessened
   eventually....calmed

Focus...
   exercise
       stabilize
    synchronize
        visualize
     internalize
  energize!

Endure!
               An ant bites at the back of your ear
         something's  crawling on your tummy
     beads of sweat, drop across your eyes,
or inside your ear...you feel the cold touch within
    
A bee, a wasp...sometimes, a fly
      circles very near your face
           makes your wall of
                concentration, crumble
              tempting you to lose count
          of the movements
      testing you...
   if you might still stray...even
      a step away...
          if, to your weaknesses
      you would still succumb

          will you be distracted?
             or stay focused?

Let eyes, and mind blink
     One...two...three...quickly!
            be grounded!
                stay on the right track.....

               Exercise!
               ...visualize....
               ... internalize.....
               ...never give up!



Sally


Copyright September 21, 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan

Starting some poems, that I then quickly scrap,
because though I feel happy, I suspect it's a trap.
So I can't write, not for any muse,
'cause I can't find the words I want to use.
Sorry for staying, and for feeling this way,
sorry for going and not talking today.
I don't understand I'm just so confused,
holding my heart, all tattered and bruised,
what is it I want? What is I need?
Just give some advice that I can heed.
Because silence is brutal, but talking makes me feel,
and I keep reopening wounds that just won't heal

It's not my first time
I've been here before
I've questioned the idea of it
I've doubted its possibility
But somehow
You've kept me believing
Prayers do come true