its not very nice when lonelieness creeps in
how do you make it go where do you begin
how can you replace the love you always knew
when the angels came and took your love from you

now your world is grey empty and so bare
when all you ever wanted is no longer there
everything around you is just an empty space
and the world outside you can no longer face

you must  use your faith with your will and hope
these  are things that matter they will help you cope
time will help the healing. time is on your side
help to fix the lonlieness and the love denied

I'm an actor in a play
But I always play the fool

To amuze the many eyes
And be treated oh so cruel

They love to make me cry
And to treat me like a tool

This world won't let me die
That's the one and only rule

I can never feel alive
Always feeling like a ghoul

What I do is carry burdens
I was made to be a mule

I am just ones and zeros
My thoughts are made of bool

I see them all around me
Like I'm the center I'm the spool

I need all of their attention
Their amusement is my fuel

I'm a character in a game
And I love to play the fool

I lose last battle
Your attention awarded
To somebody else

I cannot escape memories
Absence haunts all I do
When eyes close your face is what mind sees
Every place I go there are traces of you

when you would have thought that nerve had gone, worn down,
when you would have thought that sense was a nub, tuckered out,
given a well deserved rest, after all, it was the best of each of us

maybe a glow, flickering in and out, a summer sun between clouds,
the occasional pang pinging, radiant, radiating in forgotten places,
luxury good, can’t longer afford, once, given with a happy reckless

crazy how love stays with me, low grade infection, ready to spread,
bud by morning, afternoon full blossom, black wilt by next daylight,
can’t decipher, finally decide, these tremors make old age life worthy?

absent, but memorized slivers, old poems, drive by glances of places,
hurt like hell so briefly, double over, no one notices, so fast dispensed,
it’s crazy how love stays with me,
and it’s a crazy that tastes so good,
hurts so awfully good, so badly bad

perhaps that is why behind my back,
not to my face, they whisper,  call me,
the guy, still crazy after all these years,
just still crazy after all these tears, or just,
                                 still crazy