What were you to me?
It is only now when you are gone
That I begin to find out

Yearning for a glimpse of hope,
Out you come to save me
Under the frozen skies of winter

We ventured
Eager to find a hand to hold
Roaming through the snow, we found each other
Endlessly trapped in each other's embrace

Mesmerized, we continued to walk hand in hand
Inking the songs we made in our hearts forever
Never to be forgotten, I'll always hum the tunes we made
Every time I think of you

My love for you may seem
Conditional

But my rage and deep despair seem
Endless

Your actions, your choices, your words
Push me to the point of irrational cynic

I cannot face you
I cannot look at you
Only to pour through memories of my childhood
Now tainted

And yet I still feel
I must succumb
Must yield my pain
To save your pride

Today
Your 60th birthday
I cannot wish you well
Not yet
I'm not to that stage
Forgiving

I cannot, through gritted teeth
Say 'happy birthday'

I do not wish for your happiness
Because your quest for happiness
Drove you to infidelity

And I didn't wish for that

You will be lonely
Whether in a party
Or, at night at home.
You will be lonely
Throughout your life
Till you continue to breath.
You will be lonely
With your love beside you
Or, with the broken pieces of heart.
You will be lonely
Among the dazzling star
Or, in the brightest sky.
You will be lonely
With the glass of wine
Or, with the bottles in hand.
You will be lonely
With the thousand tears
Or, with the longest smile.
You will be lonely
With the pain from the past
Or, with all the happy memories.
You will be lonely
In this time
Or, in the realms unknown.
You will be lonely
Till you learn the art of being alone…

Some days there is an ache
That ripples through my soul like an echo in an empty cave.
Where it started, I'll never know
But it seems endless on my empty days.

With his head in his hands
And his heart on his sleeve
He closes his eyes against the light of day
And against his quiet despair
He pretends it is not real

But part of him knows
Deep down amongst half-remembered dreams
Emotions that appear from nowhere
And linger
Every cell of him knows

He knows a loss without closure
A conversation without words
Dreams without endings
And hoping without hope

He hears a knock on the door
But no-one walks in
He puts his head in his hands
And his heart on his sleeve
He pretends it is not real

                                           By Phil Roberts

Crackling. Rocking. Crackling. Creaking and oscillating, a century old **Mahogany Wood seceded to the paSsage of time.
Particles of sand, confounded by the Peninsula’s chaotic, blasting breeze now revealed a shade of burnt tar.
   Outside of the second floor Maissonette, sways the rocking chair once warmed by Grandpa.
A Tactless, impatient, rhythmic Requiem Bashes near the wiNdow pane as the sunset falls Under the frame.  
                                                        ­    Empty Folklore presides like the Residue of a once lambent effigy…                                               SwOosh. Hush!
           Cocktails were a Preamble to lunch like diabetes to Nephropathy.
Corrosive Rhetoric seeped in to expose the ego of a Sommelier.
     A smile would Parachute down when you needed it like Nicotine to remind that no Precedent had been set, just an Anomaly.
                     Cutthroat beginnings, this was no Analog man.
        In grade school his Cosmos found Zion and “The world to come”.
        This baby’s Cradle, abandoned High atop a mountain was blown by a Chinook towards the Atlantic.
                “I was found swallowed in a stained Table cloth by Balkan children on a treasure hunt, with no Guarantee and no resignatIon. "
                     The boTtle narrates these chronicles and a smile parachutes down when you need it like nicotine.
                                          Dionysus Crafted his accounts while most Garnered his spiels with Snide.                               As they witnessed dream remembrance; he thought his memory was Presumably accurate, and although his tales were triFling to the gathering audience, they became his Heliocentric history.
            Calling me a young Galleon and handing me a map, Grandpa scanned his hand across the vast land
       guaranteeing trEasure would be found if I had no resignation.
               This Asinine assertion to my teenage sister Symbolized the Barring of her unheeding imagination by time and then a smile parachuted down just when she needed it like nicotine.


_TRF

I stare
at this screen as if unpracticed
Though my reaction anything but masked
So naive we can be to feelings abstract

I see*
You lack clarity to recognize beneath you
As if you really see, truly view
What it is I so badly wish to say, hope to do
Of all that surrounds, subjects, and subdues

I fall
Forward into the plot of despair
Who will hear me, who will care
But then I recall of one passively there

I shudder
To think of what you would say now
Watching you breathless, wanting for air
Made my own lungs hostile, for how unfair
That which I craved, you had to bear

I know
The cancer was quick, it took you well
I really was not sure how to tell
You
Now there's no chance, no choice
Oh, how I miss your beautiful voice

A fair price to pay
So much we must weigh
Everyone has their cross to bear
If only there were a scale for despair

I glorify the uncertain
Making myself the aversion
Till I'm blinded to God's sacrifice
There's nothing left to romanticize

"It won't always be this way"
Is the message they send
"I just want one good day"
What they can't comprehend

Cowered small, no reprieve in sight  
I wish there was anyone left to fight
Unarmed, all defenses have fled
To the constant unbearable noise in my head

These eyes, no longer my own
My heart changed its beat
A snake has a hold of my stomach
My body admits defeat

It's merely following suit
After all, the body trails the mind
Rage overtook that system
When my father decided to resign

You might think a job
I guess you would be right
Twenty-five years of marriage
Forsaken overnight

Now if you are uncertain
This was not foreseen
He was fairly content a man
Although a bit extreme

He had all he wanted
That was insufficient
So he went quietly searching
And one lie became malignant

As I reimagine the events
Not by choice or reason
I can't un-hear my mother
Her sobs weak, uneven

I struggle to relinquish
The semblance I have left
Of the life I knew just days ago
Before this unthinkable theft

From my window, I stare into the blue,
Without the faintest clue why,
You never come.

Time drips away.
My soulmate gone,
I’m not sure, she was ever here.

Lonesome George,
They used to call me that here,
Before I became the last.

The island fills with our empty shells,
I don't know how to escape it.
I dream of visiting the caves in France.

But I too, will soon become dust;
Perhaps, I already am.
Though when I taste the water, I do remember,

The feel of Fall's fluttering leaves, together.
And while the island washes us away,
My heart never forgets you.