A fool is he that shares his bed with the fear in his head,
My choices weigh my down, like cement shoes they pull me under the ever rising tide of self-loathing that constantly threatens to drown me.
Why do I feel such hatred for those eyes in the mirror, I can only stare for so long lest the urge to put my head through the reflective pane become too much.
It is a fire.
It burns within me, this anger, this disgust.
The shadows sing quietly so as no one else can hear.
Whisper abuse, taunting,
I am weak, hopeless and predictable,
As always, I rise to the bait.
Shackled, bound, as much a prisoner as any convict rotting behind bars,
I waste away within my mind.
I'll lash out at you!
I will...
Can't stop till I've had my fill,
I starve for blood and my own will do,
I hate that I want to hate you,
I hate that I fall short of the mark,
I hate and I hate and I hate,
Until I'm completely lost in the dark...

I'll **** your demons,
Knowing you can't **** mine,
And when asked if I'm okay,
I'll respond with "I'm fine",
I'm not your burden,
Though I may be your friend,
Put the pressure on and I'll break before I bend.

I find no comfort in my bed
Where ther once was peace
Now lies dread.

I wake up each day
With sadness in my eyes
Sun peeking through the curtains
It’s my time to rise

Getting out of bed is as much as I can do
Tears flowing down my cheek over losing you

I keep going on
With a smile on my face
Wanting no part of this human race

Without you in my world
There is no reason to live
Besides grief and depression
I have nothing to give

It starts with a single time,
you get back up saying you're fine 'till in the dark place you find yourself crying,
temptation seems to work on overtime.

The slightest one you thought would be fun,
regretting it now wanting to run, feeling alone your heart so cold,
it begins to suddenly hit home,
Noticing you're not the only one feeling it ,
hurt them all without meaning it,
while all along they've been screaming it.

This thing I cannot grip,
I've lost all control,
lack of feelings in my soul,
time on time I say I'm done,
promises are made said it was the last one.

Everyones is different,
but in a way the same,
all caught in an over active brain,
each day a new beginning,
not knowing what it will be bringing,
a throw back, a relapse,
here it goes again,
each of us wonder can it ever end.