Go.

I can't sleep- and I'd like to think you are still up too.
But I know you aren't.
You are curled up in bed with the smell of her perfume
acting like a lullaby.
I'm not saying I miss you-
that would be silly.
I'm the one that ended things.
I'm not sure I ever really missed you
Just the feelings I once had-
you reminded me that I could in fact love someone.
Looking for those feelings is what keeps me up at night.
I know you are asleep because you have found those feelings
with her.

What do you do when you've had
the "awe inspiring" love at first sight-
and had it blown up?
Why does trying to love again
feel like settling?

The thought of seeing you again- makes my heart beat faster than it does when I'm in bed with him.

I found a tear in my favorite shirt
I do not understand why this hurts
it's just a simple piece of cloth
so why does this feel like such a loss
in this shirt I've been through a lot
pouring tears or deep in thought
I guess there's not much I can do
it's just your shirt, it is not you.

As I lay here, I pretend
it all ended happy in this age old narrative.
As I lay here, I imagine
a world with just the two of us, a twinkling melody.
As I lay here, I wish
we were always so closer, and nights weren't so colder
and it wasn't so gloomy, and we could step outside
and nothing was so gray,
and we would only see the blues and greens
As I lay here, I think
what if, time had a way of turning around,
and I could see you one last time,
turning around to see me..
As I lay here, I only think of you
and how far away you are and how I start measuring
distance across oceans on world maps,
pretending you're inches away from me..
imagining, you were right where I could see.
As I lay here, I weep..
in the dark, turning the night lamp on and off
realizing, it was all too good to be true and that
all good things don't last forever and
like a record that's ended, *our stories have too..