Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
  Apr 2015 Ash Saveman
Yasha Harkness
Two shattered parts of me long for you
One breaks down again and again
servos whirring yet unable to function
Another rages at the audacity
of your accusations, your insecurity
making ridicule of my devotion
Yet another furious at myself
for giving in to the lure of love
for forgetting the inherent risks
for foolishly clinging beyond the point
to which you could stand
The sixth part attempts to reconstruct
clearing debris from broken past-loves
trying, hesitantly, to repair the damage
you created in the surface of my soul

**The seventh part is dead.
It died when you left.
It was buried in the grave i dug
In which you forever sleep.
  Apr 2015 Ash Saveman
Kiana Lynn
I think that’s the painful part,
remembering our start.
The innocence,
the uncontained bliss,
it’s such a contrast to now
and I’m still stuck wondering how.
How that chapter of my life is closed,
how is it that we’ve become opposed?
I think I believed we were indestructible,
that our relationship wasn’t corruptible.
It hurts most when I think about it, about us
and all the things we said in unshakeable trust.
Those words float now,
detached, but unforgettable somehow.
I keep asking, why?
For when we were together we aimed for the sky.
Here in the now, it’s much different.
I no longer have the ability to call you up in an instant.
We’ve grown apart,
strayed so much from our start.
We’ve grown up, but part of me is still fighting for what we had
and I know I need to stop because I laugh, but the disconnect makes me sad.
I can’t say I want to forget you, forget us
because you were somebody who had my trust
but things have changed
and we’ve become estranged.
I wish it were different, I don’t think you understand how much
but somehow I’ve benefited, for now I’m my own crutch.
So the goodbye is bittersweet.
I know a part of me, in some aspect, will always be incomplete
for a bond there was severed,
but I do wish you luck with your future endeavors.
I harbor no ill will,
and we’ll meet again on some rainy day, accepting a passing fill.
But we’ll know the truth,
we’ll share a smile that holds a million memories from our youth
and that’s what I’ll come to appreciate,
I’ll carry those wonderful memories even if we don’t affiliate.
We grow up, we change
the future isn’t something we can arrange.
We can only realize our choices,
and follow through on this voyage.
It’s messy, and beautiful, and can hurt like hell
but on the bad things we can’t dwell.
So the memories I’ll keep,
locked away, just for the rainy day when I see you on the street.
We've all lost someone, or multiple someones, but we've all experienced a loss of a friend, family member or lover. Whether it be to death, or the unforeseen dramas of life, we've all lost someone we thought we'd know forever. In the last year I had this happen, and I finally felt like getting it out on paper.
Ash Saveman Apr 2015
Black
Opal
Coal
Charcoal
Midnight
My soul consumed
The horror of my past has caught up with me
I'm consumed by the ember flame
Every part dying
Withering away
Nothing left
Its a cold ground
Where I sit
Everything aches
No one knows
No one can know,
Not what I have become,
A monster inside
My world is nothing
Everything has faded away
Shades of black
Who knew that's all that would be left of me.
Strangely I laugh at this
Nothing can stop me now
For I have become a monster
  Apr 2015 Ash Saveman
Derekis
Inside a synthetic fantasy,
running from love's fall,
experiencing artificial destiny
when my life came to a crawl.

True life outside self-prison walls,
I can feel my purpose originate,
just another illusion's thrall,
twin ideas self-replicate.

(Why cant I keep misery at bay?!)

A lone perpetual memory,
I was just not chosen.
Reliving ancient agony,
I'm so cold, forgotten.

All senses lie to me,
truth hides unspoken.
Delusions are all I see,
I feel my mind is broken.

(Why cant this go away?!)

Unlit candles melt away,
under a cruel dark sun.
Colors fade back to grey,
watching a sadistic rerun.

Inside a forgotten cage
my heart lies sprawled,
unwilling to re-engage,
to her, enthralled.

How can I hope to see a new day?
If my heart still lies frozen..
Ash Saveman Apr 2015
The rain kisses my lips as I look into the sky
The clouds blanket me
And the stars smile for me
They care for me when no one else does.
I sigh as I gaze into the vast darkness of the night
I can't contain it anymore
A scream erupts from my lungs and tears through the fabric of night

Collapsed on the ground now I cry myself to sleep
A hollow shell
Ash Saveman Apr 2015
It won't ever end
Will it?
Pain is me
Not anything else
Just pain
It doesn't end
Pain of failure
Of not being good enough
Pain of loosing
Loosing everything
It comes out in red
That is the pain I like
It is a bright spot in the black
Pain of love
Of never seeing her again
Nothing ends
A downward spiral
Drowning
Chocking
Remembering
Remembering when she was mine
Everything is pain
Words that cut deeper into my skin than I ever could
Pain of listening to skinny puppy
Pain of living
Will death be pain as well?
Ash Saveman Apr 2015
200
She says 60
I say 200

Beautiful

Waiting

Nothing

Trying again

Spiraling downwards

Pain is building

Torment

When will this end?

I just want to see her

She says 60
I say 200

I just want to tell her once more

One last time to call her mine

Beautiful

Smart

She did it

Did what I couldn't

Longing

Writing

Waiting

She says 60
I say 200

One last time

This is it

Last call

Last cry

I can't take it

Suffering

Loosing

Tears streaming

Blood oozing

I failed like always because
She is the 200
And I can't even make the 60
Next page