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Ash Saveman Apr 2020
Mother knows
Stranger in my bedroom
Please don't touch me

"Oh but I already have"

Mommy don't leave me
It hurts
Don't want to be touched there

"You mean like this?"

No stop
I cry
He will be back

Face smothered
Can't breathe
Please don't **** me

Be thankful
No one else could love you
Look at you pathetic mess

Please not again

Face in pillow
Hand on my throat
Knife near by

Heart pounding
Mouth dry
Tears streaming

I said no
Please stop
Don't hurt me

Hard thrusts
Body bleeding
I cant sleep
Ash Saveman Apr 2020
Slash slash
Knife in hand
Slash slash
Thoughts in head
Slash slash
Skin red
Slash slash
Wake up dead
Ash Saveman Apr 2020
Stay up
Always late

Eyes open
Heart pounding

Wide awake
Please go away

Voices in my head
Can not be left

Body shaking
Blood dripping

Not okay
Not okay
Ash Saveman Feb 2020
I'm in love
My soul burns
I'm in love
I look into soultry dark eyes
I hear the soft whispers of his voice,
Feel the touch of his breathe dancing across my neck

I'm in love
My heart aches
His passion burns me
His distance freezes me
The dark abyss inside grows deeper

I'm all alone
My feelings swirl
I'm all alone
Darkness spreads
Loneliness grips

I'm all alone
No one wants me
Ash Saveman Feb 2020
Peeking out of the darkness
Hidden for so long
Always escaping
Always alone
Longing for connection
Peeking, is anyone there?
The darkness flows with me
Can you see it?
Can you see me peeking through the darkness?
  Feb 2016 Ash Saveman
Arlo Disarray
I've unwound my crooked spine
and forced it into a straight line
Planted my feet in the ground
and grew a whole new world for you

I've choked down a thousand perfect words
and left them stuffed into my throat
Almost impossible to breathe
And then on top of that, I smoke
Covering the metaphors with tar
And coating my lungs in a joke

A time or ten
I've lost a friend
To overdose, to suicide, to car wrecks
Death sneaks around on silent toes
Remaining in the shadows of the things we'll never know
And life is just over
Before you even know it, there is nothing
And no one
And nowhere left to go
that you haven't already been

I've been stung a hundred times
by the spines of porcupines
Or so it seems
as my voodoo doll heart
falls apart
from an overabundance of pins
and a lack of sturdy thread
  Feb 2016 Ash Saveman
Arlo Disarray
i am a hollowed out tree
whose roots have become so withered
and small
that soon i shall stop growing taller
and i will finally fall

i'm not a beauty queen
or the girl of your dreams
i'm just an amalgam of all
the pretty women that you've seen

i don't want to taste your spit
i don't even like my own
i just want to dance in the rain
naked and alone
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