the magpie stole my pen

then flapped its wings
to hide it fast
so i couldn't see it again.

i ran up the staircase

so i could see
how far could flee
in blue's cool embrace.

the day had a golden hue

up the roof
wind blew aloof
the sky said i need you.

birds were dazzled white

made pleasured cry
soared to high
stole my all eyelight.

cheerily swayed the tree

cute green leaf
in disbelief
saw me carefree.

the magpie called me then

now i bet
you don't regret
my stealing away your pain.

I wish for the star to shine,
Yet it won’t glow for me,
Unlucky.



© Pax

She sat and waited for the sirens and police cars
She knew they’d be coming
She didn’t run, just gazed at the stars

She was ready to be taken away
This was her final free day
But she was never really free
She had to take his life, this was the only way

No more torture, no more ****
She’s covered with his blood
She enjoys the smell and the taste

It was finally time for her to take back her life
That’s what provoked her to pick up the knife

He had no idea what she was about to do
He came in so cocky, treating her like a fool

She wasn’t going to take it, not one more time
She jabbed him with the knife, feeling no control over her mind

The police came in ready to fight
But she had none left in her
She was all out of fright

They cuffed her and walked her away
She grinned to herself
What a wonderful day

All I want is to talk
Again like old times,
But I'm so full anger.

You wrote to me once.
You told me to never forget you
Forgetting you is impossible.

I think about you everyday
Even if I don't want you
I couldn't forget you if I tried.

You're a lost cause,
But I'm trying to fight
Even if it means dying

Just shoot me already.
You already took out my heart.
Finish me off.

Please I'm begging you,
Just end me
Because I don't want to live like this.

Some starts from scratch,
While others start
     From scars.*

© 2015 J.S.P.

I found you last night
Slipping in and out of my dreams
Silently sliding through hallways and nudging creaking doors
Whispering as you tiptoed through my mind
I found you
As you pulled at one string a little too hard
And I was suddenly overcome with too many "one more kiss" memories, too many bucket-list items never completed, too many times when we tried so hard to fit ourselves together but everything was just too messy.
I found you this morning
Smoking a cigarette in the back of my mind
Making ghosts with the smoke that you used to teach me to spin into swirls
Laughing roughly in the dark way you would when things went to ****
I found you
As you coughed a little because you forgot to switch out puffs of your inhaler with your cigarette
And I was suddenly overcome with an emptiness that couldn't be filled with Netflix binges or Extra-Peanut-Butter Reese's cups or even the ****** poetry that I scribble down angrily with an aching hand and a desperate, gripping need to transfer so much pain through a pen and onto a page and out of me.
Because I miss the way the back of your neck smelled like smoke and nostalgia and the way your mouth tasted like Dr. Pepper and whiskey.
I found you this evening
But I told you I didn't want visitors anymore.

"I wish you were real."
She kept crying every night for days and for every restless, sleepless moment you could ever count. It felt like an eternity before this ever had to end.

She never knew that one day
she would wake up and realize that she's had it with all these damp cheeks, dried up tears, clogged nostrils, and sniffling pains.
She never knew that she would throw the very thing that meant the universe to her into the black hole, into the oblivion.