you held on to him as if he was the last tangible thing, keeping you from falling to hell. you grabbed his hand so tight your knuckles turned white as if he would run away the second you let go. after all, you didn't want to hang more flyers in your chest, begging people to call if they found him. you didn't want to have another funeral for all the memories between you and him. And my god you must have been disappointed when you realized that just like him, the moon follows everyone. he teaches them all to dance to hungry eyes, darling. you let him wring out your ego like a sopping towel and when he didn't come over that night, you misplaced your importance. you overdosed on "i love you" and now your brain is so fried, you forgot that love isn't supposed to make you cry. he was your pair of glasses and you're stumbling without him. life doesn't make sense and you can't seem to get your head to stop hurting from squinting so hard trying to keep the tears from falling the same way your mother's did when she found out you would rather be dead. i wish i could tell you it gets better but you fell and i'm so sorry but paralysis doesn't fix itself baby girl. some things in life are permanent and i'm sorry that the pain he cause you when he forgot to catch you has to be one of them.