champion* they whisper as he struts down the hallway
head held high
shoulders back, chest pumped out
his two best friends flanking his sides like guard dogs
hero the voices surround him
fawning, falling over their feet
to be the first to praise him
to get a minute to bask in the glow of his attention

but they don't see him when he's alone
******* to the very picture of masculinity
washing his hands in a daze
trying not to cry when he can't sleep at 4 am
thinking thinking thinking

they don't see his parents
not technically fighting nor abusing
but they don't speak to each other
his father sleeps on the couch
his mother cooks a hearty dinner
then eats a salad, no dressing please

they call him a champion
but he isn't all that different

why don't we talk anymore?
we used to call each other every single day
filmed ourselves and pretend we had a cooking show
****** around on photobooth
whispered our worries that boys won't like us

when i think of best friend, your name doesn't come to mind right away anymore
you're more of an afterthought
a had-been, a-used-to-be
i want to be the first person you call when something amazing happens
not hear about it from a mutual friend

i want you to text me first
and actually stay invested in the conversation
i want you to invite me to hang out
to reconnect
i want you to want to be best friends again