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3.7k · Jun 2015
certain crush
AJ Scott Jun 2015
we couldn't be friends even if we wanted to be
it might be unfar to him but more to me
That he be one way and I another

I see him in myself everyday
I want to be like him in every way
and he probably just sees me as something like a brother
984 · Mar 2015
urges
AJ Scott Mar 2015
He looks like the kind of guy
I want to take me
steal me into the night
and let nobody save me

It feels like the kind of night
with my hands tied above my head
dazed with stars in my eyes
lips on mine like flesh full of lead

He's probably the kind of guy
to bump straight into me on the train
takes a week to agree to staying the night
not very selfish and not that vain

It's probably the kind of night
When its going great in my head
but we say our goodbyes
and go straight home to bed.
896 · Jan 2016
evergreen
AJ Scott Jan 2016
I no longer think that this is me getting lonely.
I think what I want is for people to perceive me
as not a simple human, but a magnificent pine tree.
the leading pine giant held by the side of a mountain,
I want, more than anything ever possible, again and again.
Though we are linked by my roots and the soil from which I am fed,
we are the idea of a connection, a mere merging instead.

He is my companion and my support,
building at my feet little snow forts.

He is the paragon of advantage, a splendor the energy of the sun.
By volleys of ice, the head off his body is where his power is undone.
He is invincible and I am immortal
that is what makes us feel so beautiful.
I know I'm not lonely, even though I cry.
I long for this symbiosis, I understand why:
I dream of my mountain, rupturing the sky.
877 · Apr 2015
classic f r i e n d s
AJ Scott Apr 2015
down that old dirt road
all the way we go
flying and soaring on the radios bass
my best friends hair hitting me in the face

the sun sets in a pillar of coral light
enjoying inhaling breaths of dusty night
the power of the Sky turned upside down
upon her head I place an ethereal crown

I am heavy with the emptiness of freedon
all the way we go to finding our kingdom
we will rule the night with masks of neon
breathing in whispers, and simply lead on.

between the flashes and arms and legs
no one will have to feel the need to beg;
they will be experiencing the same ecstasy
open your minds and let them just breathe

Rewind and reverse to what we converse
all the way on our road paved with dirt
I don't really know whats at the end
all that matters is that I'm with my friends
839 · Mar 2015
the virus
AJ Scott Mar 2015
sugar and spice and nothing at all nice
loving and living like a walk on black ice
headless necks spilling ****** thought
lost limbs and robotic replacements bought

hide and seek with skin between sheets
little head nods and a lovers retreat
brain cysts' toxicity and ****** lips
maybe I'll heal the pain with a few nips

dessert for thought and a certain arrogance
unavoidably admitted-this is indeed romance
a viral infection where nothing is fine
violet poison absorption; im losing my mind.
this is gory i guess im sorry if you don't like that stuff
668 · Mar 2015
electronic bodies
AJ Scott Mar 2015
this game that we both entered isn't fair
a computer designed to beat the best players
it was an obligation rather than the glamour
that attracted me to this atmosphere

flashback to when we met
our bodies simply avatars and our brains the controllers
dancing with the devil of death with wires plugged into my eyes

Every step illuminates
the tracks of the system
Every touch activates
me; I was a robot without emotion

installed in my was a virus from the start
you ******* played me and my heart
you forced me watch you walk
And took with you the driver for me to restart

I cant believe you could or would do that
578 · Apr 2015
oceans away
AJ Scott Apr 2015
I woke up on a bed of moss
Spongey and warm beneath my back
Somewhere in my there is a sense of loss
A filling feeling sense of purpose, though, I do not lack

The air is heavy and weighs into my skin
The sky is low and sets my body ablaze
My blood is tight and filled with endorphin
It's a happy sickness, some sort of daze

Indigo firs crowd around me like I'm some sort of spectacle
Under tones of sepia and filters of light
Radiation of something pure, something spectral
The brown grass whispers to me in a form of delight

Warm fog rolls a billowing into my clearing
An aura of invitation, clean and mystic
It hinders my sight and usurps my hearing
And I know what lies beyond is likely cryptic

Walking through it, I am instantly transported
This mountain forest edges an empty sandy expanse
But something's not right and the distance is distorted
Floating geometric megaliths in a freakish kind of trance

Spirits of wander wisp past me in heavenly sound
Under an eclipsed sun, halway dark and halfway bright
A white wolf trots behind me, it's toes twinkling on the ground
Feathery wind tunnels vent me to move forward this night

In this place, though I am alone
It feels like I am indisputably at home
Even though not even a day has gone
It feels like I've been here for an eon
I could spend an eternity in this place
Purpose and meaning and time and space
576 · Apr 2015
trying not to care
AJ Scott Apr 2015
I haven't got a lot of sleep this week
and he seeps athleticism like a sickly sweet
Melted galaxies give me the head rush I crave
Dazzling salmon mountains, a riptide to part the waves
Bister crystals reflecting their own source of lights
Canyon voice reminders that this will have to suffice
I inhale him
and see it is he I fear more than anything
This is my choice, on my whim,
I'm leaving just so I will have the chance to see him again.
560 · Sep 2015
big bad wolf
AJ Scott Sep 2015
Oh babe, oh man, oh please
Won't you take advantage of me?
Wrap all of me up in your big, thick arms,
Tight and deadly like a mummy's embalmed
Use your hands to suffocate me,
Cover my eyes so I can't see
Bury me in a coffin the shape of you
My face pressed against your chest, what a good view
All I want is for you to hurt me,
to kiss my face and then comfort me
Bruise my arms and sweeten my skin
Hide all our demons deep within.
This is between us and no one can know
The love I want and the love you show
My boo, my man, oh please
Won't you take advantage of me?
lately
554 · Jul 2015
lolita
AJ Scott Jul 2015
I want my cake and I
wanna eat it, too
It's my party and I'll
cry if I want to
Spare the rod
and spoil your boo.
inspired by a certain recent song? what
531 · Mar 2015
the northern lights
AJ Scott Mar 2015
A cosmic invitation in his slightly uninvolved eyes
shows me a shared future, or an immediate demise

It flashes quickly

he, lagging,
sticks around to keep up with me
me, bragging,
to no one of the secret we keep

loving and feeling, we'd fall right asleep
Underneath the same clean linen sheet

that look, ensaring
me into that "I-must-give-in" trap
his voice, daring
What do lovers do right before a nap?

Everything he says: an allusion to later
he likes to prepare me, just to make sure

Then before I know it:

His arm squeezing my neck
like its always been our thing
as proudly, I look
at my new wedding ring.

and then his body swings right by me
and the eyebrows he gave me probably didn't mean a thing
I hate thinking about puppy love but hey, we all feel it, man.
491 · Jun 2015
matt
AJ Scott Jun 2015
Inside me there is something like a chrysanthemum,
Irradiating a light like the sun.
Growing, it unfolds an oasis of bliss
Chalk full, it pours a dismantling happiness.
It feels like my ribcage is about to burst.
Warm and heart beating, like I was shot first.
the gun to my chest is his voice in my ear
I tried my best over the course of this year.
480 · Jun 2015
things I hate about boys.
AJ Scott Jun 2015
you want me when you can't have me
but you could care less when I'm actually free

When we talked, it was with ease, a breezy air
and now you really don't seem to care
you're just using me and it's so unfair

You used to show me how to be myself
Now who do I go to to cry out for help?
This is worse than being put on the shelf.
479 · Jul 2015
Here and Now
AJ Scott Jul 2015
He laid his heavy head on my pillow here
and I laid mine on his shoulders there.
I'm chained to the middle of the now
but my mind wheels back to then.
He knows me by my overwhelming fear
that hes going to vanish into thin air.
I feel more than okay when he pushes me down
and I can finally feel normal again.
AJ Scott Apr 2015
untie me from this earth and let me go
he is beauty divine and I am nothing but his
free me from this man who I do not know
I want to be mine and be taken away from this

barefeet on needles and sticks among pines
I rub them in my palms, impress little lines
I fail to count the thousands of eyes
squeezing the seeds out and whisper goodbyes

nobody ever really talks about it
most everybody has thought about it
there is more relief, than the actual action,
thinking about the release and reaction.
440 · May 2015
this isn't me anymore
AJ Scott May 2015
In a land
where their skin glows
and everything goes
people aren't afraid of tomorrow
of the places they'll go

when perturbed with a question,
they just say I don't know
instead of a simple no
they don't cry out, oh!
they dont ask to say it isn't so

They wait for a reunion;
the stars are their home
they dance till they die singing let me go
in an instant they can vanish in smoke
***** oil left behind by the hoax

I wanna go.
418 · Aug 2015
m.IV
AJ Scott Aug 2015
you destroyed my earth
to my end and from my birth
and now it's impossible to get anywhere
there is no soil for me to walk upon
asphyxiation is the least of my problems when there is no air

you corrupted my system of time
to the night and from such fresh dawn
I cam confined in the incarceration of a dimension
and you will do nothing to ease the tension

I cannot tell my friends what you've done
I thought we were supposed to be having fun.
I cannot blame you, because that would be arrogance.
I will not blame me, because that would be ignorance.

At the center of this planet that we used to run,
you have created something deeper than a black hole.
I've grown tired of trying to reach the even horizon.
406 · Mar 2015
that's just who you are
AJ Scott Mar 2015
He looks like a bear
but lurks like a shark
His words are unfair
more bite than bark

He's got beautiful eyes
and even prettier lips
something inside me dies
when I watch his swinging hips

He deeply invigorates me
iron butterflies in my stomach
so many that it's scary
He's just that ****** slick

His anger proves me prone
but round me it travels
in this I feel alone
and at the same time unraveled

it feels good for a minute
even when he's cruel
there's reason in it
when I say I love you
354 · Aug 2015
m.V
AJ Scott Aug 2015
m.V
"Circa five years"; that phrase I always said
I hoped in that time we'd still be on track
But now it's not a joke and it's stuck in my head
won't you say it back?
nothing's ever hurt like this
343 · Jun 2015
rings of red
AJ Scott Jun 2015
rings of red rim perfectly gold irises
condemning me to exile in a world of delight
my minds linger in a summer with sticky skin
and adventure calling my name in the night

I lay in my bed, and hear nothing but the sound of cars passing by
you are simply a fantasy, something to think about when I close my eyes

I ache to quell this yearning for expansion;
to drive in your car and see where we go
It won't happen and these dreams are transient
I'm fed up with thinking these thing so please, leave me alone.
305 · Jun 2015
5/15/15
AJ Scott Jun 2015
woke up thinking about death
staring at the opposite wall
I used to be scared to death of dying
But it hasn't crossed my mind in awhile
So I tried to imagine the deformed abyss
The lack of color and ever-changing, nondescript shapes.
The pressure in my eye sockets and absence of thought
But I realized
*I just don't care anymore
optimism at its finests

— The End —