A grey sky, a little rain and long way home
Only a shirt, the faster I walk the colder I get
A flash of lights , a brighter smile, a hand out too hold
Its about to get worse, aren't you glad that we met

A quick drive, with quick talk as the sky outside weeps
A reverse park, an open door and a green welcome mat
A warm room ,the smell of food, says please take a seat
You must be hungry too , aren't you glad that we met

Soaked shoes off,  nice cup in my hand and  we are talking
Feeling happy, a little tired, on the table my cup is set
Are you strong,yes I say, let me see, shirt off I'm shaking
I like a good strong boy, aren't you glad that we met

A short walk, a new room a nice bed and I am sleepy
Bed is blue, cardboards white, walks around me like a cat
Says pants are wet take them off , says my shy is silly
Take a nap don't be scared aren't you glad that we met

Lightning flashes, thunder booms, an man and a child
Both in a bed, a hand on my cheek, says not to cry or be upset
A little sound, a lot of pain, that drink has made me mild
Now inside you are warm too, aren't you glad that we met

I think He danced
I think God danced when his first creation looked up and  smiled
When that first being realized that it held all his love
He must have danced and danced for a good long while

I think they dance
When the universe births a new light in its darkness
When a new star flares so bright even lighter then it's elders
And planets and moons dance in circles around its radiant brightness

I want to dance
Like God I want to be overwhelmed by joy as I dance forever
Like the stars I want to rejoice and dance around perfection
But if I was to dance , I would only dance for her

If i could dance
I would dance to your heartbeat, the rhythm of your life
I would dance to your laugh, the symphony of a beautiful soul
I would dance to your words and dance through the whole night
I would dance for you, for your melodies have made me whole

I wish we could share burdens among us
Share whatever has our shoulder shrugged and our backs bent
Distribute that weight until it's as light as a bad dream on a good day
Chip away that burden with every smile and nice word received and sent

If we could share the darkest parts of ourselves
The passage ways, corners and closets that play host to our tormentors
Battle together the pull into the void that calls with promises of peace
Attack those spaces , bombard them with light  even to our inner centers

But I cannot share with you all that brings me pain
Yes it would be nice , but it cannot  be true
To give you one of the demons that have found a home in me
To make you feel what I feel could i still claim to love you

I am sorry, but these nightmares are mine and have been for so long
Not even the heaviest rain that hides and washes away tears
The rain that eventually stops and brings light home
That rain can do nothing to soothe and calm away this pain and my fears

I can't say if I am showing strength or something of another sort
But I will fight my void, shadows and demons on my own
Though I want to ,I cannot take your hand in support
Because when the darkness eventually takes me,  let it take me alone.

Invite me to a masquerade held in a large hall
Most guests would be in suits, those you can see
Almost all are dark males, all quite are tall
All can't dance , because all of them are me

Few in this hall are some of my peers
One of me in a mask basks in their wonder
To them this mask is wise,and one without fear
The face behind though is foolish a coward and a blunder

Few in this hall are some of my enemies
One of me in a mask delights in their distaste
To them this mask promises violence with energy
Behind is the face of exhaustion and no anger to trace

Few in this hall are some of my mentors
One of me in a mask  indulges in their praise
To them this mask is one of potential and future
Beneath lies the face marred by failure and laze

Few in this hall are some past lovers
One of me in a mask savors their longing
To them this mask is a story with a knight and a tower
But beneath Is the face of a lier gifted with talking

Few in this hall are my fellow Christians
One of me in a mask flaunts his humility
To them this mask is of true religious commissions
The face behind long faced spiritual sterility

The last in this hall are my family
I face them with half a mask of strength
To them the strong half mask, and the true half face of apathy
The half mask hides a face exhausted with it's life's long length

It's all a game , but all games have a how to play
If life was a game , where are the rules we live by today
If we are players , where are the judges with the final say
Is it because it's all a game that you treat me this way.

Fine ,it's a game, what is the reward though
What can be so worth tearing another person down so...
What joy do you feel as you stab with your smile and let my blood flow
What logic is there to your game,I'm desperately trying to know

It hurts to think about how much fun you must be having
I'm ashamed of myself for the joy i get from knowing what you are wearing
A real player of this game would know better than lay down all his cards
Only for a prize that he will be sharing

To be honest I'm really **** at games, I still hate to lose
It seems the only way I win is if first place came in twos
It's possible im not good enough, but I no longer know what is true
The truth is Iv never been a player , I'm no match for you

What are you after my dear , and is it really worth my pain
Is your sleep only peaceful on the bleeding hearts you've claimed
Are the words IV heard true of the player with many victims slane
If so I am blessed ,at least I was able to add a little to your fame

And so I wait,
and watch as another steals smiles that belong to me,
I wait
as another takes in the beauty that only I should see,
I wait
as another feeds on the warmth she gives to him leaving her weary,
I wait, I hurt, I weep
but I cannot have her till I am certain that I can set her free

But

She will know
The memory of her still burns fresh and new in my mind
She will know
My heart is forever in two and she owns the other side
She will know
She is the only one for me no matter how far, I'll follow close behind
She will know, i hope she knows
She is my sky, worth all the stars that men can find

Though

I want to
Undo all she has suffered ,all the pain she has built walls against
I want to
Free her wings ,convince her that with me those walls are waste
I want to
Look in her eyes,mock chaste and patiently wait as not to invoke what comes of haste
I want to, I need to
Let her come to me, with her scars and bruises and hurt, though slow, to me she is never late

Thus

I will
Not push, but gently nudge ,as a parent does one she loves dear
I will
Like a lovers wisper in a dream, utter unheard words but the feelings are clear
I will
Never assume, till she sees me ,I'll only ever be her peer
I will, I will always, I will forever
Someday be the source of her joy, with a love so intense Cupid might have used a spear

Cut me ill bleed
Lie to me I'll hurt
Your emotions are hard to read
You change them like a shirt

Hit me I'll bruise
Ignore me I'll whither
You could never ever choose
Then again you never chose me either

Drop me I'll break
Look down on me I'll shrink
I give and you take
Give me poisoned water I'd still drink

My emotions are my blood
The more I lose I might die
So cut me and I'll bleed
I'll bleed till I'm dry

-Hugo

Can we try not to lie to each other,be each other source of stress
Can we try not to ignore each other, create more ice
Can we try to be open with each other, free to express
Can we try to really talk , not just fill out chats with emotionless Hi's

Try to understand, I'm not good at this
Try to understand, no one is
Try to understand,I'm careful with my love
But I do understand, without love we'll starve

Try with me, the harder it is the higher it's value
Try with me,we will use our own rules made for ourselves
Try with me, all I feel I want you to feel too
Trust me and I'll love as if I'm under a thousand spells

-Hugo

She asked absentmindedly if he is happy truly
Through a dozen shields of complements and praises her question went through
The three words a catalyst to a stagnant volcano making it unruly
Once upon a time he wanted to be happy too

Not every thing is for sale and yet everything has a price
They say happiness can't be bought but to have it comes at a cost
He tried for so long to focus on things that brought him joy
A foux path led him so astray he could barely feel all he had lost

Blame may be relative but guilt is always true and final
The weight of his selfishness bore down on him
The result of so much time wasted on nothing sent him into a pity spiral
He learned that to want joy had become his greatest sin

Perhaps the type of happiness he saught was the problem
He met reality like a freed slave learning no one is really  free
'are you happy' she asked again wanting an answer
With a heavy smile, he said 'happy has never been for me'

By-Hugo

The girl child is strong, I was raised up to know
The girl child is rarely wrong, even when it's not so
Though a fragile build, a fire in her shows
The girl child is always the first to take life's heavy blows

The young girl works hard, at school and at home
The young girl learns duty, engraved in every bone
The young girl dresses well, her look like polished stone
Weight of family, weight of duty, weight she bares alone

The teenage girl has personality, she learns to artfully speak
The teenage girl has attraction, hence the company she keeps
The teenage girl  is temped but the bucket of weight and duty never ever leaks
She wants to be free like the boy, in frustration she can only weep

The young lady is focused, determined without fear
The young lady has barriers,that she slowly begins to tear
The young lady is pressured by society, more duties come near
The young lady graduates well, because of her *** her future is still unclear

The woman is taken in only for the beauty of her face
The woman is the minority, in every single race
The woman is more qualified, but for her there's just no space
It is a man's world, didnt she ever learn her place

It's a cruel world for her if she doesn't become strong
It's a cruel world for her if she cries at every wrong
It's a cruel world for her if she mistakes life for a song
Be strong woman, for woman's  life is usually very long

By-Hugo

I seek the mystery of the night, I crave the one wearing midnights lace
I need to see the depths of her darkness and become lost in her velvet embrace

I seek truths unseen by normal men, only ever beheld under a sunless sky
To humble myself and plead again and again, her attention a shooting star, still catch it I will try

Her skin dark, with a sheen as though stars are lined underneath
Her eyes all seeing, the secrets they hold and the truth they know
Her lips the lock in which few if any man or woman hold the true key
A blasphemous thought to think there is a flaw in her from head to toe

I am mesmerized by the dark skin of the lady with a lions name
I am trapped by the possibilities of the girl with the gun firing roses
The dark woman, a lioness that no sane person will ever try and tame
I am enchanted, at great risks I must get to know her dispite the threat she poses