How odd is it?
That I feel like the universe's center
Whenever we're together

Isn't it unusual?
How I feel completely grand
Whenever you clasp my hand

I find it too peculiar
How you manage to make me feel spectacular
And it's too extraordinary
Just how much you make me happy

But strange doesn't even begin to cover
How much I feel like I don't matter
Whenever we aren't together

I am addicted to your warmness
Mesmerized by your tenderness
I am simply attracted to your being
But my heart is hindered by something

You show me two different faces
That tears my decision to pieces
What should I really feel?
Which side of you is real?
The one you show when it's just us two
Or when people surround you
The one who pacifies my nightmares and demons
Or my every doubt and every fear's manifestation

Am I just a distraction?
A source of attention?
Do I matter?
Or do you only think of me when we're together?
Do you only remember me when you crave for comfort?
When you're lonely, in need of love and support?
Does it even matter who gives you warmth?

Answer me truthfully...
Do you really love me?
Honestly...
What do you think of me?

I do not love you
Nor am I in love with you
I honestly have no feelings for you
Yet...

But what will happen?
Once I've completely fallen?
How will you act? Which face would you show?
Who the person is and which is the mask, let me know
Tell me the truth about the face behind
It doesn't matter how nice or unkind
I need to know which is real
I need to sort out how I feel
I want you all for myself
But I don't think you even know your true self
So for now please stay away from me
Because I'm on the verge of falling completely

Our accidental encounter
That inserted your life in my existence as if its the most natural thing in the wold

I should have stayed unknown
And
You should have remained anonymous

You were broken
I was shattered
We were bits and pieces
That didn't fit together

But we tried
To staple, glue and control
The remains of what has been
Of what was previously whole

A lot of pieces are missing
Some where stolen or given away
Some are nothing more than ash
Some forgotten and some are here to stay

We tried to stitch up each other
But we ran out of thread
What started out as a way to recover
Now brings about dread

Fearing to hurt or be hurt
We arrived with the decision
That we should grow wings
Instead of rebuilding our prison

Instead of forcing to be whole
And forcing to fill in the gaps
Instead of risking to fall into the abyss
We should create our own map

If we can't fix what broke
If we can't restore what was lost
If we ran out of thread, staples and glue
Then lets go beyond the uncrossed

If we can't make the ash whole
Then lets build something new
If we can't go back to what has been
Then lets start with today, me and you

Instead of glue, staples and thread
Instead of living in fear and ache
Instead of breathing doubts and dread
Let us be abstract, let's be a mosaic

It's an old saying that to know
Whether one's love is true
You must first have a sip
Of the coffee they will serve you

The coffee, cozy and warm
The blend should be right
The sweetness not heavy
The creaminess not too light

A cup full of warmth
The perfect cup of joe
A blend to suit only you
There's more to tell you though

The old saying is incomplete
They forgot to mention
They left something out
Something that we should've known

Like coffee, love can be too hot
Singeing and scalding its way
It can also be served cold or chilled
Iced coffee isn't that bad anyway

Though it can be bitter or too sweet
You might be lucky to get the best lineup
The perfect blend of coffee served
But you're not the only one with the same cup

The entire room was swallowed
With the intoxicating scent of coffee
Found on the old wooden table
Is your mug, the same but now empty

If given a choice, I would decide
To go along for the ride
As long as you're with me
I'm willing to bet on the uncertainty
Of that so called infinity
And sought after eternity
Transport to a world of color
With the touch of our lasting ardor
I offer you this life and forever
Whichever would last longer

Who knows?
Honestly nobody does
The path that lies ahead
Can make you alive or dead

Can make you alive or dead
Dead, living but stuck on the same place
Alive, struggling to overcome difficulties
Alive, someday defeating all adversaries

Yeah, the path ahead may be ideal
Bright, warm, promising and sunny
Straight, smooth and not winding
A bit boring but hey its soothing

Want the truth?
It's usually never like that
What's ahead can be dark and eerie
Gloomy, hopeless, twisty and thorny

Wow writer, so much for inspire
Shhhhhh, keep reading
It's not easy to make these rhyme
So spare me some patience and time

Yeah yeah, I know.
Rather than the happy smooth drive
You get the stormy seas and skies
Want to know why?

What lies ahead will be a soul crusher
Your heart might waver, vision may falter
Emotions would fluster, strength could shatter
You'll be lost and tired, rest but don't surrender

Afraid?
Who isn't?
Isn't it scarier to live never finding out
Regret of lacking bravery but having an abundance of doubts

Yes the path can be demotivating
And absolutely overwhelmingly terrifying
But have you ever seen unguarded treasure?
Something amazing lies ahead, I'm sure.

It won't be easy
I wish it was but it usually won't
It's alright to be afraid and uncertain
Rest, clear your thoughts, then fight again.

You'd never know what's at the end
Without taking that first step
And to be continuously walking
So rest if you're tired but keep going

I tried to break away
To break free
I really did.
I flew, only if you could've seen me.

Clingy shades of trouble
Painful looking but pain free
Marking spaces on my skin
Where your lips used to be

Clingy shades of purple
Some temporary tattoo
Of unorganized design
A secret concealed by two

Clingy shades of couples
Proud but remaining unseen
Silent proofs of emotion
Traces of where you've been

Clingy shades of trouble
My all time favorite scar
Reminds of your presence
And the tale of what we are

I took for granted
Something i once knew
A world of color, a mixture
Of beautiful shades and hues

I realize now how pretty it was
A world of color, now fading
Slowly being engulfed by gray
Water washing away its meaning

Everything is black and white now
Lifeless but easier to understand
I ran, panting, desperate for air
Exhausted and unable to stand

Winded, unable to pace myself
Frantically chasing, there it stood
Trying to hold it with my hand
I extended my arm as far as i could

Still not within my reach
I desperately move onward
Taking every step in the hope
Of finally reaping that reward

If roles were switched
It might even look funny
But it wasn't, so here I am
Smirking and laughing at me

Trying to breathe once more
I realized it way too late
That the world of color I love
Was something that I used to hate

That all I've been desperately chasing
Was a scenery beautifully unfinished
On a washed up battered canvas
Of lines previously drawn and cherished

Of the colors and hues painted once
Afterimages, of the picture we used to make
That I kept reminiscing in my dreams
And kept haunting me while I'm awake

It was burning, a fire so warm
A fire that lit, not scaldingly hot
It captivates, lures, and terrifies
It was something I knew not
Something I'd love to touch
But afraid to try and grasp
Something I'd wish to hold
But won't dare own and clasp
Familiar but somewhat new
I knew of fire, but not like this
Unaware if the fire was violent
Or whether a gentle kiss
If it rained flowers of blood
Or poured bloomed rosy petals
Whether it lit to tame and lure
Or to show impending pitfalls
A familiar fire I never knew
Will it burn or only illuminate
To strengthen or extinguish
How will i decide this fate?

Before the explosion of rosy crimson
Before the shadows engulf the skies
It was this that painted the heavens
It's the color of the sun's loudest cry

The sound of alarm starting the day
The feeling of the morning breeze
The smell of freshly made coffee
The taste of toasted bread and cheese

The pitter-patter of raindrops
The cozy and slow afternoons
The noontime TV programs
The dancing to our own tune

The painting of the clouds
Dyeing them red then blue
With us together under moonlight
Whispering goodnight and I love you

I remember yesterday's daybreak
You and I, under the same sun
Now, I awake to today's daylight
Facing the day, knowing you're gone

In the duration
Of whatever we had
I only spoke of truth
From start till end

When I first said those words
Three words, fragile yet strong
When I said I'll stand by you
Whether right, lost, or wrong
When I said that I want you
Want you to be my future
When I said I forgive you
Regardless of all the torture
When I said I'll handle the pain
That I'll be strong enough for us
That we'll make it, endure it all
That we'll bet no matter the cost
When I said I'm willing to fight
To fight for us against all odds
That I won't let go that easily
I meant everything, real not frauds
You were so difficult to love
Lovable and oh so painful
For my first fluttering heart
And heartache, I am thankful

From the first I love you
That you've heard
And every thing in between
I meant every word
.
Then I lied
A lie to end the truth
A lie to release what's true
.
In the duration
Of whatever we had
I only spoke of truth
And told one lie

When I said I no longer love you
When I changed "love" to" loved"
When I bid a tearless goodbye
What I meant was I've had enough
When I said I no longer love you
I idiotically and honestly still do
But the truth that I couldn't say is
I no longer can nor do I want to

In the duration
Of whatever we had
I lied once
A lie to save myself