Rose Who Knows

Rose Who Knows Oct 2018

Fall feels
I love to bring out the comfy sweaters
get your hot cocoa ready
snuggle up close
read a book
or watch a movie
while the room is filled with falls feels
filled with compelling scents

wishing for the scent of home
the scent of pumpkin spice
(even though I don't like pumpkin)
(gasp)
the scent of the crisp cool air

Fall feels encourages crushes
it just happens
not this time
not for me

they are fun
the mushy feelings
the butterflies
late night talks with your gal pals

the whispers
the quick glances
the lopsided smiles
that make your heart beat quicker

it's cute

not for me
not this season
there is too much going on

but I'll laugh with you
I'll smile
I'll support you
and wish the best for you

It's fall break 2018

#fallbreak #fallfeels #fall #crushes #cozyweather #friendship #romance #cute

Rose Who Knows Oct 2018

Part I: water and air

Treading water
so calm and peaceful
tranquil water

rising
falling

rising
falling

as if the water was flowing
to the tempo of my heart

inhale
exhale

my tranquil waters are disrupted
something is not right
the water slides past my ears
suddenly
I am jostled out of my daydream

the ripples turn into waves
they want to engulf me
feel me tumble in their depth
and feel me gasp for
breath

I am in my last semester of college and this is how I feel.

#college #last #semester #worry #anxiety #thefeels #whatwillhappenifiletgo

Rose Who Knows Sep 2018

The boy who laughs

The Catman told a joke
The boy's laughter bounced off the walls
I knew that laugh, so I smiled to myself

I knew before even seeing him
His broad smile lights up the room
His full laugh fills the room
fills me

If only I could be the reason for his smile
If only I could be within his sight
If only it could be as more than a friend

Something I wrote a couple years ago about a boy I liked.

You may notice that I use code names for some people I refer to.

#crushes #smiles #laughter #wishful #ifonly

Rose Who Knows Sep 2018

Rosie

To you who has always believed in me
You have always loved me
Ever since the first time you held me

You were always sassy and sweet
You had these old wrinkly hands
That had touched so many lives

You had beautiful blue eyes
That would watch me with care
Even with your tall boney frame
hugging me so tight I didn't even care

You loved crafts
You loved teaching students
You loved me

I know it's not just about me
There were those who were closer
But I just wish you would say one more time
"I'm not bionic!"
Oh how that was your catchphrase

In remembrance of my great aunt Rosie

#deathlossgriefloved #ones #heart #ache #sadness #i #miss #ui #love #u

Rose Who Knows Sep 2018

Silent fears and tears

The tight feelings in my chest
The hard squeeze of my eyes
to shut away the feeling of hurt
and loneliness
I am the outcast
the wanderer stuck between two worlds
Lost Lost Lost
I'm a wanderer looking for where I belong
Who will help me up and out?
Who will open the door to their world?

Pleading silently for you to stay away
For if you saw my eyes
you'd know something was amiss
Even if you asked
I don't think I could explain something
I don't quite understand

If you won't include me
I won't lean in
I'll keep my distance

You don't know
You can't see
But I won't tell

r.h.

This was a time in my life where I was reunited with my family after a long time apart. Yet, after being together for so little time I ended up shutting myself in a closet to get away from them all. So, I could cry and write.

#drama #emotional #anger #feeling #lost #heartache

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