I lay in the impression of your body
On the right side of the bed
The side pressed against the window
Always the window facing side was yours
Perhaps because you always felt the urge to escape
The need to be able to flee my presence at any given moment
Any flit of your mind
And any flicker of my imperfection

In the dark
Laying in the attic
The rain is slow and painful
There is one persistent dripping directly above me
Many more feel as though they are closing in on me
As if taunting my incompetent tear ducts
My eyes that refuse to cry

Your words speak to me,
They let me know
There is somebody else like me.
Your words are art to my eyes.
Floating figures from an alternate reality.
Touching my thoughts.
Whispering in my dreams.

That poem you wrote about me,
is my favorite of your works.
How could it not be?
That's the most wonderful thing
anyone's ever done for me.
To care enough to be inspired, by me.
To care at all.
But when you asked me,
I lied && said I liked another one better.
I didn't want you to think I was being arrogant.      
I care what you think.
When you told me that your favorite
movie trilogy was The Lord of the Rings,
I told you that I'd never seen any of the films.
What you don't know,
is that later that day
I went out && rented all three films.
I stayed up that entire night
watching them straight through.
I thought it would help me
to understand you better.
I thought it would make me feel closer to you.
I'm not sure if it did that,
but I enjoyed the films nonetheless.
I've always had a problem
conveying my emotions to people.
I convey all sorts of emotions,
just never the right ones at the right times.
Somehow it always felt like I'd be too vulnerable, showing people how I really feel.
For as long as I can remember,
I've always acted the exact opposite
of how I really felt. It felt safer.
I guess I always thought that if I showed another emotion, other than how I really felt, when I was ostracized, criticized, put down, for such displays of emotion, I wouldn't be affected by it.
After all, that wasn't the real me anyway.
Boy, was I wrong.
I now have enemies who love me,
because I've only ever shown them
kindness, so they wouldn't know
how I really felt about them.
I then have people that I would go
to the ends of the earth for, that believe
I hold a strong disdain for them.
I'm not quite sure how to fix this conundrum I'm in, but you really make me want to figure it out.

You once said that in your lifetime
you wanted to witness unrequited love..

I took your hand in mine
and walked down the streets
of tiled memories
yet to be carved

I stole your cigarette
from between your fingers
just like you stole my feelings
without noticing

I lit it in the passenger seat
next to you, just like the way
your eyes light up when they fall
upon my sight

I looked at you, next to me
and mentally snapped moments
without you noticing

I took a drag from your cigarette
the same way I take your breath away
when you kiss me

I filled my lungs with sinful smoke
the same way I fill your mind with wicked
thoughts of me

I exhaled fumes of sighs
the same way you do when I embrace
you for a while

I rolled down my window
and felt liberated, like you do
when you lie there on my bed
with a smile on  your face

I put my hand out
to dance with speed, feeling the wind
caress my hand like you do
when you want to comfort me

I took a sip from that cheap can of alcohol
and smiled, it was cold and sweet
just like your skin, when you sleep next to me
in winter

I felt sedated, borderline drunk
just like you when I lay my skin
on  yours overdosing you with heaven on earth

I rested my head on the seat
and marveled at the night sky
wondering how such simple beauty
can be so mesmerizing
the same way you marvel
at my eyes,
when they wake up
and
light your
dawn

I was whole before you came,
mightier than an animal with a mane.
hated by many unlike a celebrity full of fame,
and then you came.
Showered me with compliments without a shame
made me feel like i'm your greatest gain.
But one day I was so close to being insane
because you stopped calling me babe
and acted as if you didn't know my name.
you closed all the window pane,
left me like an unfinished game.
Now, i'm a just broken pieces of pain.

my love
thy hair is one kingdom
  the king whereof is darkness
thy forehead is a flight of flowers

thy head is a quick forest
  filled with sleeping birds
thy ******* are swarms of white bees
  upon the bough of thy body
thy body to me is April
in whose armpits is the approach of spring

thy thighs are white horses yoked to a chariot
  of kings
they are the striking of a good minstrel
between them is always a pleasant song

my love
thy head is a casket
  of the cool jewel of thy mind
the hair of thy head is one warrior
  innocent of defeat
thy hair upon thy shoulders is an army
  with victory and with trumpets

thy legs are the trees of dreaming
whose fruit is the very eatage of forgetfulness

thy lips are satraps in scarlet
  in whose kiss is the combinings of kings
thy wrists
are holy
  which are the keepers of the keys of thy blood
thy feet upon thy ankles are flowers in vases
  of silver

in thy beauty is the dilemma of flutes

  thy eyes are the betrayal
of bells comprehended through incense

Humanity i love you
because you would rather black the boots of
success than enquire whose soul dangles from his
watch-chain which would be embarrassing for both

parties and because you
unflinchingly applaud all
songs containing the words country home and
mother when sung at the old howard

Humanity i love you because
when you’re hard up you pawn your
intelligence to buy a drink and when
you’re flush pride keeps

you from the pawn shop and
because you are continually committing
nuisances but more
especially in your own house

Humanity i love you because you
are perpetually putting the secret of
life in your pants and forgetting
it’s there and sitting down

on it
and because you are
forever making poems in the lap
of death Humanity

i hate you

i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body.  i like what it does,
i like its hows.  i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new