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We were so right for each other,
like the sun
and the
moon,
but our timing was off,
and the sun had to rise too soon.
To the people who don’t or won’t support me,
I don’t live in your solitary reality.
I see the world in an equal and just perspective,
It’s affective, connected, receptive, near-perfected.
So I’m not going to heed your advice,
I knew as soon as I saw her, what I think is right,
I’m going to do what I was put here to do,
I refuse to listen to you and your out-dated views.
You say you will go to the city in the sky,
Way up high in the clouds, after you die,
And you say people like me will go to H-E-L-L,
Then I’m glad I’m not near you and your homophobic smell.
Plus, sending me back to my warm, homely home,
Your cult will crumble like the Colosseum of Rome.
You see, Satan is known for destruction and death,
So if you decide to oppose me, you just took your last breath.
I would kiss her right now, make you feel icky and horrible,
I would hold her hand; remind her she is adorable.
I would mess up her short, dark hedgehog hair,
I would gently hold her face in two hands and stare.
We would poke our tongues out at you, and then grin evilly,
Then skip away, holding hands, eyes twinkling gleefully.
Me and her, we don’t give a flying hoot what you think,
You’re small, insignificant to us, gone in a blink.
Me and her, we don’t want or care for your opinion,
You’re just doing what you’ve been told, like a good lil’ minion.
You go do your thing, and we’ll go do ours,
We will look up and follow the brightly glowing stars.
These boundaries,
wouldn't seem so blurred,
if I dated a him not a her.
Maybe women aren't right for me. Femme women at least are starting to feel all too wrong.
Her
Her.*
Her *smile

Her voice
Her eyes
Her love
Her laugh
Her warmth
Her existence,
My **everything
This whole time
I have been
Searching for Her
In Movies, Books, & Fiction

Wanting her to come off
The pages
Or jump out of the screen
So I can recognize her
And resonate and relate

All so I know I exist
Outside of myself
I wanted a character
To make sense of me
Pull my paradoxical-self together
In fiction form

Be a strong woman
And a vulnerable girl
A student of Law
And
Fairy Tales
A believer in logic and reason
But also all the abstract and obscure
To believe only what you see
And know the most real existence
Is what I cannot see

To laugh and smile with your eyes
Even after your eyes have seen so much death
To be this combination
That people claim I am
That is so rare

I am an enigma
They say

Normally people search for
Themselves
In the real world
But since that is where I already exist

Fiction seemed
More real than Life

I wanted to find
Myself in the world of
Fiction

A character
That could make sense of myself
So I knew I existed
In the real world

I wanted to know
That someone else
Could have pieced me together
And imagined me
And drawn my character in its arc

So I can relate
To more than just
A character from a Soap Opera
Or a heroine with a Bow and Arrow
Who is so real
Yet never smiles or laughs

But then
I realized
If someone
Could have pieced me together
In formula- fiction with such ease
I wouldn't exist
With all the paradoxes and complexities
That real humans do
In real life*

~JLH
Our playlist is
the best love songs
that helped voice words
we needed spoken.
Falling into you I found myself
For with you I was never lost
Blinded by an unkind past
The present, tinged with shame
Became my only truth
Then... I saw you

You gazed upon me
Open and trusting
And I could no longer hide from myself
Your eyes peel me naked
And I stand bare before you
awaiting a judgment that will never come

You see what I thought I lost
What felt like it died long ago
You see who I used to be
Who I always have been
And because it's you
I believe it's true

Your smile is my hope
Your heart carries my heartbeat
Your eyes, so full of love
Prove that I am all I ever wished to be
All I was supposed to be
Before life beat the joy out of me

You found me and I knew
I knew you were mine
I knew you before I met you
I dreamed you alive so long ago,
And here in my heart, I fell in love
In your love, in loving you...

I can learn to love me
5417
Ten thousand leaves fell
with a single wisp of air
that escaped from your lips
as you smile;

that is how rapturously I fell in love
with you.

— The End —