Sorry
For texting you, for bugging you,
for annoying you.
for thinking of you day and night.
by being clingy and possessive.
for staying by your side every time you push me away.
Sorry I get worried about you.
for needing your attention,
for being needy to you.
Sorry for loving you.
I'm very sorry... I can't unlove you.

My mind
it races
with thoughts
of you.

My heart's
quickened pace
in reaction
to you.

My hands
yearn to
touch your
own hands.

My lips
they long
to kiss
your cheek.

My body
gets nervous
pressing against
your body.

My cheeks
turn red
when you
love me.

there are monsters everywhere.

no,

i’m not talking about
those under your bed,
those waiting for you in the dark,
those hanging on the branches of the trees,
those staring at you when you sleep,

no.

not those monsters.

i’m talking about
those who destroy your good mood,
those who bring you down in every mistake you make,
those who always look for a flaw in whatever you do,
those who make you feel sorry for ever being here.

those monsters.

but just like the monsters you imagine

— they are all in your head.

you can ignore them
and see that those monsters,
are ever so small;
so easy to trample,
so easy to destroy.

She has tried her hardest not always but often
She falters on occasions not often
She wants him to see how much she has done
She wants him to stand by her side when she is not at her best
She knows he is willing to do it sometimes not often
She knows that he feels sick just looking at her
She knows that he can't stand her
So, she backs away into silence right beside him
Right where he can see
Because unlike him she would stay at his worst
She would die for him always not often

God. How am I still not okay?

God. It's been so long.

God. I'm so tired of life right now.

God. What happened to me?

I was such a nice kid.
I was calm all the time.
Mature for my age,
Little but so lively.

I was so helpful.
So loyal.
I always supported my trust.
But I never really spoke my mind.

I was shy.
I was small.
I never stood up for my feelings
I never stood up for myself.

And now I'm older.
I realize I don't need support.
I need myself.
I need confidence.

Speaking your mind is not wrong.
Standing up for your feelings isn't rude.
Standing up for yourself isn't mean.
Saying what you feel doesn't make you imperfect.

No one's perfect. Not even them.
The ones you hate for being so amazing.
Maybe she has anxiety.
Maybe his mom is alcoholic.

No one has a perfect life.
There's not one perfect family in the world.
There is not a person in the world who's perfect.
There's not a person who doesn't have one bit of strife.

But just because you aren't perfect.
Doesn't make you less worth it.
You're amazing.
You're still charming, kind, and strong.

You're just more experienced.
You just understand some more things now.

And maybe, just maybe,
You just aren't as shy anymore.

It's 3am

I'm on the phone
No one's awake and I'm alone

It's 3am

The radio's on
Songs are played on lonely station

It's 3am

I'm in my bed
My eyes are open and sleep has fled

It's 3am

I'm on the balcony
The sky is dark and just quite scary

It's 3am

Some windows have lights
Could they also not sleep tonight

It's 3am

I'm still awake
When will life ever give me a break