I always see them.

Laughing with their friends,
Head thrown back
Sunlight spilling down their throat
Lighting up their crooked teeth.

I want that to be me.

for all the love i bear for you
eventually ill pay
the price of love is grief, i fear
amassed along the way

and when the debt collector comes
to claim the pay that's due
he'll take the love and leave the grief
with either me or you

Sometimes
I have to remind myself
That I made a promise
That I am not
In the business of giving up

I don't mind
Traffick in the morning
Raindrops blurring
The stop lights
Into technicolour beads
The paper touch
Of the air conditioning
A butterfly kiss
Landing on my cheek

Sometimes saying goodbye to someone
doesn't nearly hurt as much
as saying goodbye to the version of you
that existed alongside them.

i told you i was hurting
and you caused me more pain