Megan

Megan Jul 2018

Medals

Remember the Rush?
I do.
Remember the Feel?
I do.

Remember the time you felt alive and all was still?
The day you got that
That medal of yours

You thirsted for them
Had to have more
And you achieved another
Another achieved again

But that last accident threw you for a spin
And you’re on bedrest
You’ve lost some shine
Like those medals

These medals of mine...

Maybe I’ll make another poem about how I get up and become what I used to be but I can’t do that because it’s not true... I really peaked when I was younger and now I don’t have anything going for me..

#medals #competition #shine #lost #win #winner #loser #idk #bored

Megan Jul 2018

Is It Just Me?

I’m upset.

But the type of upset that has no words;
The type of upset that doesn’t feel like anything;
The type of upset that I should have known would come back.

I’m lost.

But the type of lost where I know where I am physically but not mentally;
The type of lost where I’m doing what I’m doing but I don’t know how I’m doing it;
The type of lost that keeps me from forgetting what I still know.

I’m angry.

But the type of angry that keeps me calm;
The type that leaves me speechless;
The type that helps me reign in my rampage.

I’m here-
And there-
And lost and scared.
Upset-
Can’t breathe-
It’s just me.

It’s just me.

Bored in love ?

#itsjustme #me #you #confused #boredinlove #upset

Megan Jun 2018

In the end loving myself

I miss the late night drives,
With you by my side-
I miss the late night skies,
With glowing stars like glowing eyes-
I miss the late night highs,
With the bonfire for light.

Oh and how I am now-
With none of the above.
Oh and how I am now-
With Nothing I love.

I just miss the you and the smile,
The rush of love gone wild-
I just miss the hands in the cold,
The warmth of something to hold-
I just miss us naive;
not wise and old.

I don’t have the time though,
To think of these now.
I don’t have the time though,
To wonder about how.

It’ll just be me—
Upset again forever.
It’ll just be me—
Learning to love another.
It’ll just be me—
In the end loving myself.

But then again
          I’m still left
                    With Nothing
                                I love

I feel unnecessarily angsty and such ****

#yaya #latenight #nothing #hurt #brokenheart #clichestuff #heartbroken

Megan May 2018

Crazy Kids

We were always crazy kids with crazy dreams.
And we never changed.
Crazy kids.
With their crazy ideas.
Ideas of world peace and of no hunger.
These crazy kids they say.
But I’m one of them.
A crazy kid with her own crazy ideas.
Crazy dreams.
Dreams full of nothing but the future.
Crazy girl. With your crazy thoughts.
Stop for a second.
They’ll say give up.
Don’t do it crazy kid.
Don’t ever look back.
Or down. Or away.
Crazy kid with your crazy thoughts.
What will you think of next?

I want to progress... I want to change things.

#newworld #crazy #crazythoughts #thinking #think #thought #whatnext

Megan May 2018

Doodles in Class

I'm in class
doodling-
instead of paying attention-
doodling instead of listening.

I'm just hearing
the mumbling
of the professor...
professor-ing.

he's talk talk talking about...
something.
Doing something
because of something.

But I’m just doodling.
Again not listening.
Again not hearing
Such important details

Of something
Happening somewhere
Because of...
Something

Something bad is happening
Again
Sounds like something that’s happened
Before

I continue to doodle
adding tornados to the scribbles.
Causing mayhem between
Simple blue lines on bleached paper

Just like somewhere
Where something happened
Because of...
Something

Concentrate-
Harder like the pressure of the pen
I doodle with
It’s too late

Lecture over.

Don’t get me wrong though I love class and learning! It’s just sometimes it’s like people never listens in class or take their own initiative to learn something and that frazzled me up a little lol

#drawing #art #doodle #class #school #payattention #mumble #learning

May 2018

Another Bad Poem

hello, poetry?

it's official
it has been
a month

a whole,
wild month
but still a month

a month of
countless words
and
hundreds of views

though the question is
what is the point of this?
i've been here a month
and i'm still not sure

do i write here
just so
i have an outlet?
to get these feelings out?

am i here
to seek acceptance
to find people who feel like me
or who appreciate my thoughts?

am i just here
to feel wanted and understood
to hear praise and
watch my views climb?

is this a way for me
to say things to people
that i don't have the courage to say
in real life?

or am i here to help
diffuse my anger
and dull the pointed edges
of my soul
and try to put together
the shattered parts of me
by accepting them myself?

Megan May 2018

A small backyard

I close my eyes
So tight that it hurts,
so tight that I'm crying

But I'll keep them shut
Until at least I can remember
until at least I can understand

When you were the one
who spoke to me
who spoke to me about wanting this small backyard

I didn't want the cherry tomatoes
so red
so sweet

Next to the chilli peppers
so pungent
so spicy

But you planted them there anyway
In this small backyard
In this hole in my heart

And the cherry tomatoes died
overbearing chillis
overbearing on me

In this small backyard
where you planted seeds
Where you planted love in my heart

I don't know what it was
But the way it is now
but the way they taste now

I like the backyard
with the hole in the ground
with the hole in my heart

Overbearing chillis
you replaced cherry tomatoes
you replaced the sweetness and the ****

Poem dumping again don't mind me ! I don't really go through my poems before I dump them lol but here it be also ****** because dumps lol get it

#backyardlove #backyard #summer #plants #sweetandspicy