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  Nov 2017 Jas
Evan Stephens
Out with my ex wife
almost in the old haunts
like the bar where we saw
the Hungarian jazz band
with the wild accordion man,
the same bar where she first said
it was over, all cards were dealt
& it was a losing hand.

Bringing her there,
more angry now
but less burdened,
clearer in that way,
as she coaxes me out
from the silent shell
I wear as habitually
as the old houndstooth coat.

Drink after drink -
coffee, coffee-flavored beer,
just beer by the end -
felt like old times.
Walking the miles,
the benighted embassies,
trying to guess them by flag.
Seeing us, you might almost
believe the night didn't come
& chill us to the bone.
  Nov 2017 Jas
A
You
I've always seen you.
Standing in the hallways,
Talking with your friends.
And I wanted the moment to stay.

I've always liked you,
Your hair and face and smile,
The way you are,
The way you live and love all the while.

I'll never be able to admit it,
It's too much to bear,
I'm afraid that if I confess,
All my love will go somewhere.

So I'm content with watching,
A quiet background figure,
And maybe, just maybe,
You'll see me over there.
Jas Nov 2017
She listened,
He deflated,
I broke
And it's so **** cyclical.
I leave little bits of me everywhere I go,
I find stranded bits of her in every new place
And like a metal detector he collects them all.
Jas Nov 2017
I want someone to adorn me as if I were a blank, brick wall in the city.
I want someone to brand apart of themselves onto my bare surface
So that my purpose, no longer being to stand
Can be to unite those who tagged in memory.
I want the bubbles frozen in cement between each layer of me to be hijacked and painted in all colors;
I want the smell to stick and ferment inside of the holes, so that each person that strolls
Can smell the lives of the people who have touched me.
  Nov 2017 Jas
pluviophile
i hate math
not because it's boring
or it requires work
but because it is the thing
that causes my mom and i
to fight
you won't realize this
thinking it's only a shallow opinion
but to me
math is a wall
separating me
from love
Jas Nov 2017
There's something about text messages in the dark.
Late at night, with the glow of the LED
Illuminating one's face, burning the eyes
It's romantic and slightly painful all at the same time,
It's usually for love,
At least it sounds similar to it.

There's something about text messages in the dark
When you wake up from a nap.
Those tend to feel like
Midday shipman reminders;
One missed call from this one,
Several from that one
And a few text messages from friends -

Or when one arises, yawning
From a deep slumber and repeatedly slaps the bed in search of the forgotten phone burried underneath the covers
Scrolling through feeds, counting messages
Noticing the ones in particular from a special person
That's when one realizes they've missed their chance at a flirty conversation
But boy do they have something to dream about now
Oh, there's something sweet about text messages in the dark.
Jas Nov 2017
How long has it been since you've last gone outside?

Routines are the sedatives of all souls
The wild ones whose dreams bedazzle beyond a pillow
But all infallible ones turn the lights down low,
Lean against the window and count the blows.
The world appears to be wide awake -
It's deathly void of color
The lights from the stereo beacon for party goers in the making;

There's something to be said about life from the second floor.
I can't put my finger on it
'Cause you and your vision never make it to the other side of the window
But I don't want to keep stride through clouds of smoke.
When I succumbed to rest, the leaves were green.
As I rose, the branches were bare and accusing.
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