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Eleanor May 2016
How sweet are the lilies she grips in her hands
As white as her dress in the moonlight
Yet she inhales harshly through her withering lungs
She gazes towards the sky with tearing eyes
The cold emptiness burning inside her chest
She whispers the words under her breath
"One day I will be the lucky one"
"One day I will be the lucky one"
"One day I will be the lucky one"
The words float to the sky
The lilies turn red
She has no control over her head
She drops to the ground and the grass becomes her bed
Staring at the moon she crys once more
"One day I will be the lucky one"
Hoping with all her might that it will come true
And her life was taken too soon
By the knife they call depression
The bullet they call sorrow
The rope they call lonliness
And if your heart is beating
Then you are the lucky one
Because most of us are bleeding from self-destruction
  May 2016 Eleanor
Nicole
We lie in the dark,
on the sidelines of existence.
watching and waiting
for the day the fire can leap from our throats
and scorch them all.

But for now,
we observe and listen.
silent in the shadows,
we see them,
spitting sparks of words that sting each other.
unknowingly sealing their fates.

And when the day comes,
we, the silent ones,
will creep out of the dark.
our fire will singe them to the ground.
realization in their eyes,
that their sparks
ignited a fire that burned them in the end.
  May 2016 Eleanor
Nicole
Maybe she wanted to die with white flowers,
clutched in her hands as the world stopped..
Lost in the field of broken glass,
she had his world in her grasp.
tossing and turning,
so she sparkled with deadly glass spikes,
coated in a syrupy red.
the flowers still pristine white
and her mind lost among the lights.
his tears chased her far away,
to the end of the earth where she stayed.
Teetering between
death and life.
he wanted to end her strife.
so he gave her the flowers
to take her away
to a place where she could be safe.
but she fell off the edge
into the sea of glass,
with those white flowers clasped in her tight grasp.
Eleanor May 2016
Drown out the sadness
Drown out the pain
Drown out the voices inside my brain
Eleanor May 2016
I see you wondering what the world may hold
Casting your shadows on the days of old.
Seeing the light yet it doesn't shine on your face
Reaching for the sky but it doesn't feel the same.

I know the end is the end for you
But can't u see i want to go with you
Your lips on mine is all I dream of
Drowning in this water and you pull me above

These cards all disappear
Your dreams just fall away
You don't realize you need me
And I need you just the same

These hollow minds are all I see resting in my hands
And the care within my heart can no longer be bent
Can't you stay another minute longer
Have to go so soon I cannot wonder

The scissors up your sleeves
The tremblin of your hands
The tears within my eyes
I cannot even stand

Be careful my love
Don't fall like I have
For I am down in the depths of hell
And you are all I have

Left and left
Again and again
I cry for you
Because when shall I see you again

I have a hollow mind and an empty heart
One cannot see the trouble
And your are kind, gentle and smart
Stay where u are safe not in the rubble

Of our own disasters
Eleanor May 2016
Longing to express it
Not to suffer and suppress it
But you tell me I can't
you tell me it's easier
You tell me it helps
I tell you it kills me.

Regreting my expectance
Receiving no acceptance
And you tell me I can't
you can't stand to hear it
I can't hold it in
I can't turn off my emotion

Decaying so painfully slow
Dead and so horribly alone
You tell me I can't
You say you need a break
That's it's better if you do
And I can't stay awake

Already lost in my asleep
Burried so far in the deep
And you tell me I can't
makes everything worse
Tearing me apart
How do u think this helps!

Maybe it will benefit you
You think it will benefit me too
You tell me I can't tho!
And I'm lost in this storm
Of endless torture
Forever so numb

In the end when you come back
I'll be the same and not on track
Because you tell me I cant..
I've held it in for so long
It's killed me so slowly
Nothing but dust
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