If I keep still
For much longer
I'll disappear

No,
I won't vanish into thin air
Like a blow of a cigarette
Or a cry of dispair

I'll stay,
Pinned to this bed
A petrified marionette
No longer attached to the strings of this net

So you ask,
What trick do you play
To fool your own self
To step out on this day
As lonely and grey
As it might come your way
Or as you may portray?

Sometimes,
A touch of oneself.
"A sheepish remedy!",
You might complain.
"You should feel shame!"

What can I say...
At least,
It gets the heart pumping
As I go out lumping
To tick the boxes on this never ending list
Hoping to find unexpected bliss

Oh Brother,
On your quests always so diligent
To accomplish what you seek
My efforts remain negligent
My body tired and weak
Though we share the same blood
And grew up in the same hood
Your mind found its way
Among words to stay
While mine got away
So foggy and stray

Our hearts,
Stepping out of the same closet
Yours fueling your strive
Mine consuming to survive
Yours building a mindset
Mine still looking for an outset

Oh Brother,
You ran to a land faraway
Just when I found I could relate
So I used this gateway
To be able to articulate
For expressing myself face to face
Would only unwholesomely convey
What my mouth could no longer retain

Oh Brother,
What should I do to snap out
Of this prone position, so tightly bound ?
I’ve wiped my tears and shout
But still can't loose the pound
And this obsession with loosing
Got me trapped into this tunnel

Vision of Gideon
Where can I find you?
Is it a person?

I need a clue
Give me the cue